Chapter 80 – When a Woman Turns Thirty, She Gives a Golden Brick; When She Turns Thirty… She Gives Her Son!
Wu Ge was dumbfounded and felt that something was off about the situation. “Aunty, what do you mean?” Wu Ge shook his head, “Ah… that’s not right! Aunt Liu, what do you mean? I don’t understand!”
“Do you not understand my meaning? Are you pretending to be clueless?” Aunt Liu said with annoyance, “I’ve experienced so much in life, been married three times, how can you not understand your childhood thoughts?”
“But, I truly don’t understand!” Wu Ge shook his head.
“You’re still pretending, huh? Actually, I’ve figured it out. Everything you’ve done these past few days, wasn’t it all to attract my attention? Wasn’t it for…” Aunt Liu blushed and lowered her head, “To win my love?”
This sentence could be called the ultimate oily-attack! Wu Ge felt nauseated!
Shaking his head vigorously, he said, “No! I haven’t! Say it!!”
“Hehe, you’re still pretending, huh? You were so brave and shameless before, but now you’re pretending to be innocent!” Aunt Liu said with an expression as if she had seen through him. Wu Ge, full of survival instinct, said, “I really haven’t. There’s a misunderstanding!”
Ignoring Wu Ge’s response, Aunt Liu lowered her head shyly and said, “Actually… the first time I saw you, I felt a bit moved. Because you look so much like my husband who passed away years ago!”
Wu Ge: “Why does it feel like an insult?”
“But considering our age difference, we wouldn’t be suitable together. So, I extinguished that thought,” Aunt Liu continued.
Wu Ge nodded repeatedly, “Extinguishing it is good. People shouldn’t hold onto fantasies.”
“But…” Aunt Liu bravely raised her head, “Your sincerity and persistence moved me!”
Wu Ge: “Oh my god!”
Bravely, Aunt Liu walked over, “On that day, you actually fell into my arms with a nosebleed! On that day, you boldly called me ‘baby.’ In front of so many people, you were in Boss Lin’s office, impatiently treating me like that… Do you know how much you touched me?”
Wu Ge: “Are you kidding me!”
“At that moment, I thought, marrying a daring and sweet-talking man who desires me anytime, anywhere, is worth it!” Aunt Liu continued emotionally. “Ugh~”
Wu Ge urgently said, “Aunty, listen to me. It’s all a misunderstanding, coincidences…”
“So-called coincidences were all part of your long-planned encounter!” Aunt Liu exclaimed, “Xiao Wu, from now on, don’t call me ‘Aunty.’ I’m 30 years older than you. Just call me ‘sister’!”
Wu Ge: “Fck!”
“There’s a saying: ‘When a woman turns thirty, she gives a golden brick; when a woman turns thirty…”
Aunt Liu fell into deep thought, feeling as if Wu Ge should say: “She gives her son!”
“Xiao Wu, you’re right!” Aunt Liu laughed uncontrollably. “Although he’s not as handsome as you, I have a son who is extremely filial. He will definitely take good care of you!”
Wu Ge: “What the heck!”
Aunt Liu fantasized about the future: “And, in a few years, I will be able to receive retirement benefits! Let’s live a good life, look after our grandchildren, and enjoy family happiness! We can also go and dance in the square. How beautiful would that be!”
Wu Ge: “What the heck…”
“But, when we go to dance in the square, you better keep an eye on other old ladies and not try to seduce them. Act like an old man and not let them get near you!”
Wu Ge: “Hahaha!”
To do something like that to a woman who is a dozen years older than me…
Damn it!
How could I possibly have such thoughts?
He touched his chest!
Today feels too piercing, why did I encounter this kind of situation? A young and fresh piece of meat like me in my twenties being pursued by a middle-aged woman in her fifties! He felt he couldn’t just sit back and wait for his demise! He felt like he could still struggle a bit: “Aunt Liu…”
“Why call me Aunt Liu? Call me older sister!”
“…”
“Or you can call me Baby!”
“…”
“I’ll just call you Aunt Liu! Aunt Liu, it really won’t work between us. Even if you agree, your son won’t.”
“No, I agree!” A voice came from afar. Turning his head, a tall man around 1.9 meters tall, about 30 years old, walked over.
“This is my son, Da Chun!” Aunt Liu happily walked over and introduced: “Da Chun, this is your Uncle Wu, and also your mother’s sweetheart. Say hello!”
“Hello, Uncle!” Da Chun’s voice thundered.
Wu Ge: “…”
Wu Ge’s face twitched as he looked at Da Chun, who could practically be his older brother. At this moment, being addressed as “Uncle” felt extremely uncomfortable. But now is not the time to dwell on these small issues.
“Da Chun, how did you agree to this with your mom?”
Da Chun: “Initially, I didn’t agree…”
Wu Ge relieved: “That’s more like it!”
“But Boss Lin did some convincing on me!”
Wu Ge: “What the heck!”
“He said that my mom is getting older and needs someone to take care of her. And I’ll eventually start my own family, get married, and have children. It’s impossible for me to take care of my mom forever.”
“But you’re different! You were so eager to be with my mom that you even did such shameless things, damaging your reputation. That shows you really like my mom and you’ll take good care of her!”
Wu Ge: “What the heck!”
Da Chun chuckled, “He also said that if my mom is with you, we don’t need to worry about what happens after. You’re young, healthy. Not only can you take care of my mom, but you might also be able to take care of me!”
Wu Ge: “What the heck!”
“And when I saw you, I realized you really resemble my dad, who passed away many years ago.”
Wu Ge: “…”
This running joke is hard to avoid, huh?
Da Chun said with a touch of sadness, “My dad passed away 23 years ago. I was just 7 years old back then and hadn’t even been weaned…”
Wu Ge: “…”
A bit late to be weaned, huh?
“But he left us, mother and son, and we’ve been struggling on our own for over 20 years, sob…” Da Chun cried, and Aunt Liu shook her head.
Wu Ge: “My condolences!”
“But Uncle, since I saw you, I haven’t felt sad anymore!” Da Chun wiped away non-existent tears, looked up with hope in his eyes, and said, “Because you look so much like my dad, it’s like you were carved out of the same mold! And you’re exactly 23 years old. Maybe you’re my dad reincarnated, coming back to take care of my mom! So, can I call you ‘Dad’?”
Wu Ge’s face turned green in an instant!
Oh my god!
Da Chun, you’re rushing things a bit too much, aren’t you?
I thought of you as a nephew, and you’re thinking of me as your dad? You’re more impatient than your mom!
1. The wordplay here lies in the similar pronunciation of “金砖” (jīn zhuān), which means “golden brick,” and “儿子” (ér zi), which means “son.” The proverb humorously suggests that when a woman turns thirty, she might start worrying about marriage and her son’s future.
