Chapter
Every time I’m with Miura’s group, I feel one desperate problem.
The problem is, not a single one of them knows my real issues.
Well, it’s not like I only have one or two problems.
First of all, my body is both strangely resilient and at the same time malnourished.
Even without undergoing an examination, I can tell. It’s true that my diet is quite unbalanced. If I’m not malnourished with this kind of eating, then it must be some kind of internal function of my body or something like that.
And the biggest reason why I’m eating such a poor diet is simply “to save money.”
If I were an ordinary 30-something guy, I probably wouldn’t be so stingy. After all, the only things I have to spend money on are rent, drinking, and food, right? Even considering a hobby expense occasionally, there’s still a bit left over. I don’t even have a family, so it’s not a problem if I need to go to the hospital.
Now that I’m a student, I realize how amazing my parents were.
…But I can’t just go around blabbering about this to others.
Especially since Miura is already worried about me.
“How about here?”
The place Yamashita stopped was—
McDonald’s.
“……”
Um, this place might be okay?
I blinked and looked up at the fast-food sign.
Following them around, the places we usually go are mostly trendy cafes or bakeries, so I always ended up spending quite a bit.
As high school students, we could have gone somewhere cheaper, but that wasn’t the case since Miura and Fukuda, who are at the center of the group, didn’t seem to calculate their expenses at all.
From appearances, Yamashita seemed to have the same image—
“Don’t like it?”
Yamashita tilted her head and asked, so I quickly shook mine.
“No, it’s fine.”
“Let’s go then.”
Talking with Yamashita felt a bit weird. Both of us were speaking with the minimal words, and our responses were also just a few words. It was like girl high school student Morse code.
When you look at our physical age, we were both at a stage where we should be talking a lot, yet we both fell within the bottom 10% of talkative girls.
I chose the Big Mac. Yamashita picked the large Big Mac set. We each paid, but of course, since we ordered together, the meals came out on the same tray.
Yamashita waited beside me and, without giving me a chance to try and grab the food, she lifted it up triumphantly.
Then she boldly led the way and took an empty seat.
Since the school is in Minato Ward, it’s easy to mistake it for being somewhere ordinary, but Minato Ward itself is the heart of Tokyo. It’s where Tokyo Tower is located, and there are several national headquarters of Japanese corporations. Naturally, it’s a bustling area with a lot of people, but it still wasn’t too busy yet since it wasn’t even five o’clock in the afternoon.
That said, it wasn’t quiet either.
As soon as I sat down at the two-person table where Yamashita had taken a seat, she immediately grabbed the distinctive red fries container from McDonald’s and dumped it all out onto the tray.
The regular fries and the large fries were mixed together so that I couldn’t tell which was which.
Seeing her stack the containers with a nonchalant expression, it looked like she didn’t really care.
“……Aren’t you going to eat?”
Feeling slightly guilty about eating it straight away, I just stared blankly at the fries when Yamashita picked up her Big Mac and said,
“…Eat.”
Watching her rustle the burger wrapper, I did the same and unwrapped mine.
The scent of beef patties wafted into the air. It might be a normal description, but for someone like me, who rarely eats meat, it was truly a sweet aroma.
When I opened my mouth wide for a bite, the greasy patty, lettuce, and a bit of pickle sandwiched in the bread stuffed into my mouth.
Delicious.
It had a very greasy taste that seemed bad for my body. But isn’t this grease exactly what I need right now?
“…I’ve never seen someone eat a McDonald’s burger so deliciously.”
“……”
As I was chewing a big bite, Yamashita said this, so I moved my mouth in a slightly less chewing direction. But I had already chewed too much, so I couldn’t help it.
Yamashita ate the burger with an expressionless face.
But she was definitely eating much faster than I was. Is it because she’s a growing teenager?
After finishing her burger, she took a sip of her cold cola and this time reached for the salty fries. There were probably fries in there that weren’t mine, but if I were to nitpick, I wouldn’t be able to eat at all, right?
I pushed that guilt to the side and put some thinly sliced, fried fries into my mouth.
The salt and fried potato went really well together. I didn’t know if it was a mistake by the employee or if it was just how Japan is, but there was no ketchup on the side. But it was still good like that.
Yamashita looked at me curiously as she popped a few fries into her mouth, and finally spoke up.
“So, what was that about?”
Ah, right.
That’s true.
We came here to talk about this.
“I…”
Trying to say something, I paused.
Seeing me freeze while holding the fries, Yamashita shrugged her shoulders and picked up more fries.
“You can tell me when it’s convenient. We have plenty of time.”
She must think I can’t talk because of my trauma, or because I’m too frightened by the seniors to say anything, but in reality, it’s different.
I got caught because of the hot dog that was laid out on the floor.
And that was a hot dog attached to a fishing line.
Of course, there’s no denying it. Kaneko from the same club started it first, and I was just playing with it and got caught.
The reason I got caught initially was simple: I was trying to catch a croquette without any kind of consultation.
“……”
If the other person were Suzuki-sensei, I would have probably stiffened my expression and nodded in acknowledgement and wouldn’t have asked further.
Miura would have probably done something similar.
If the literature club members talked about how I chased after a hot dog, they’d easily believe that’s how it happened.
Fukuda… I’m not so sure. Maybe similar to Yamashita. She probably wouldn’t have been as quiet, though.
“…Can I ask why you’re asking?”
Earlier in the bathroom, I saw the captain of the athletics club getting hit in the face with a bag and bleeding, and then I saw another kid rushing in to deliver a straight punch to the solar plexus.
While I don’t think I’ll face anything like that, it wouldn’t hurt to be polite, right?
“Because Miura will worry.”
The answer came immediately.
Oh, I see.
Yamashita said she had been friends with Miura since middle school. Perhaps she had known her even before that.
“…”
And the reason for worrying about Miura was something I could sympathize with too.
After a brief moment of thought, I said,
“…It’s the athletics club guys.”
“I heard about that.”
She was next to the bathroom, so of course.
“…There’s someone in my club who used to be in the athletics club. Apparently, there was bullying, and the bullied person left after trying to protect that person. I’ve gotten close with that person.”
“So, vengeance?”
I nodded.
Well, even without the hot dog part, the story is mostly right.
Yamashita let out a short sigh and took another bite of her fries. I did the same.
For a while, there was only silence between us. I could hear people laughing and chatting around us, but it felt incredibly quiet right here.
“What are you going to do?”
Yamashita asked out of the blue.
“…Huh?”
“Them.”
Ah.
The athletics club?
“Since the teacher knows.”
“Right.”
Yamashita went back to eating her fries again.
I wish that… had continued a bit longer. Of course, talking too much is uncomfortable too, but the awkward silence is far more discomforting.
I hesitated for a moment before opening my mouth.
“Why were you there?”
“The bathroom.”
No, I know that.
“…It was in the corner. Fukuda and Miura weren’t there—”
I cut myself off midway. Yamashita moved her eyes to look at me, and that reminded me of the face she had in that bathroom.
But Yamashita didn’t keep that expression.
She looked down for a moment and sighed lightly.
Holding her fries, it seemed like she was wiping something off the tray like it was a cigarette that had burned down.
“…Family issues.”
That was the answer.
Hmm.
What a simple, clear, and logical explanation.
It was a statement that could stop any further questions.
Sure, if she had family circumstances she couldn’t talk about, it would make sense she would want to sit somewhere alone and think.
“Dad is cheating.”
“Oh.”
Wait a second. Stop.
There’s no need for further explanation. It’s a secret, right? Did I just see someone’s ears perk up and wiggle from sitting behind it?
I mean, even if I might inadvertently bring up some very personal story in a public setting, I’d naturally start paying attention without even realizing it.
“…How did you know?”
“They admitted it directly. I pressed them.”
Oh.
Hmm.
That.
“Seems like they’re about three years older than me.”
“……”
Hmm…
Should I comfort her?
I don’t even know how to comfort someone.
What, something like, “At least they’re not a minor,” if I said that then she might sink down like someone who received very poor CPR on her solar plexus, right?
I’ve seen funerals at houses where people’s parents have passed, but I’ve never heard of parents cheating.
We ate fries in silence again. It didn’t feel like we were eating quickly, but the dumped fries had disappeared in an instant.
“What about you?”
“……”
Yamashita asked.
“Are your parents on good terms?”
“……They don’t come home.”
I replied that way.
That… was extremely awkward.
I feel a little guilty saying that right after getting such great help today, but the truth is, just a day ago, I wasn’t that close with Yamashita.
It’s not like I dislike or feel awkward around her or anything, but there’s always that distinction. There are close friends, and then there are different people who are friends with those close friends—a friend of a friend.
It’s someone I hang out with often, but when alone, we hardly talked, and it felt weird and unfamiliar—something like that.
It’s a relationship that could be called a friend, but I was scared of casually calling her a friend out of concern for how she might react with, “Was that so?”
So now, suddenly sharing family issues was a bit surprising.
“Must be bad?”
“……Yeah.”
It’s definitely not something I could say is good. I’ll say the other party doesn’t seem to dislike me, but it seems Kagami doesn’t no longer see me as more than a tool for them.
“Yeah, seems that way. Usually, on days like this, people call their parents.”
Yamashita picked up another fry and did the same thing as before, rubbing it against the tray paper. The fried outer part cracked, and the white potato peeked through.
After a while of doing this, Yamashita spoke up again.
“Today’s talk stays a secret from Miura.”
“…Okay.”
Like I would tell her.
If I did, I would be exposed immediately.
“I’ll keep it secret too.”
That’s… thank you.
Honestly, while receiving Miura’s pure concern and worry made me feel better, at the same time, it also brought on a heavy sense of guilt.
I… appear like a malnourished high school girl on the outside, but on the inside, I’m a 30-something man.
A high school girl patting me on the head to comfort me is something I could get over with a smartphone character. But if I received that kind of comfort in reality, it would feel kind of illegal.
Of course, I’d have to wait at least five years before smartphones come out in this world.
Seeing Yamashita gulping down the remaining cola in her cup, I followed suit and gulped my drink down, feeling the cold beverage fill my stomach made my forehead and temples ache.
After we finished eating, we came out together and stood next to each other outside the store.
We walked in silence for a bit until we got to the station.
“Well then, see you tomorrow.”
“…Yeah. See you tomorrow.”
Yamashita raised one hand in a wave, so I waved back. She waved her hand lightly in the air and turned away… to go home. I guess.
She should be going home, right?
Since she said her dad is having an affair, they probably aren’t getting divorced. I can only imagine what her family situation is like.
…
Ah.
I feel like I now understand why Yamashita went out of her way to tell me that story.
Miura or Fukuda are too close to her.
If she brought something like that up, it would just worry them for a long time.
Yamashita doesn’t want that.
I’ve been there too. The other person is genuinely worried about me, comforting me, and asking if I’m okay, but on this side, the heart has been crushed to the point that I didn’t want to hear any of that.
Talking about it only makes you reflect on it, and thinking about it only increases the pain and reminds you of reality.
Especially when you’re in a sensitive stage of life, you might want to get it off your chest, but in reality, you can’t just drop it to someone.
You end up suffering alone and blowing up.
And I must have coincidentally been present during that explosion.
“……”
I quietly watched Yamashita’s back as she walked away, then turned around.
…
Let’s go back.
And when I meet her tomorrow, let’s just act as if I didn’t hear anything.
I’m not in a position to help her with anything.
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