I’ve been thinking about a few things since I crossed over to this world.
For example, I know that the stocks of the electronics company with the apple logo and the Korean company with the blue logo will steadily rise over the next 20 years. I also know about the coin prices that started rising in the 2010s and peaked in the 2020s.
I may not be an economic expert, but I do know some ‘certainly rising snippets of information.’
Of course, right now I’m a kindergarten student, so that information doesn’t really mean much.
The 90s were when I was spending my childhood, and my family directly faced the financial crisis during that time, so I have no memories of “how to make money.” Unfortunately, the current me has no ability to make Kagami a huge pile of cash.
Ah, but that doesn’t mean my ‘future knowledge’ is completely useless.
For some reason, I retained the ability to use Japanese and kanji, which I’ll need to live in this world, so I’ve been considered to have exceptional reading ability compared to my ‘peer kids.’
If it had been an “I don’t understand it at all” situation where I’d have to start learning from the beginning… well, at least I could clearly confirm that I’m living in ‘fantasy.’
In my previous life, I was someone who didn’t know Japanese, so just having these ‘nonexistent memories’ allowed me to realize that unreal rules are definitely being applied.
Moreover, the ‘common sense’ I possess isn’t limited to just Japanese.
“Koto Ne, Koto Ne.”
Kagami said with a very excited expression.
My back felt warm. I was in Kagami’s embrace.
After kindergarten ended, we had both returned home from our day.
Kagami was curious about what I did in kindergarten today, and I naturally took out the learning material from my bag to show her.
It wasn’t anything extraordinary. Like usual lessons in kindergarten, it was a learning sheet filled with essential knowledge and information that one should know before entering elementary school—written in big letters.
Hiragana, Katakana, relatively simple kanji, the alphabet, and basic arithmetic.
…That’s right. The problems were of a simple difficulty that even a ‘kindergartener’ could easily learn.
Naturally, I could solve all of those problems without difficulty. Much faster than the other kids. Even the kindergarten teachers were surprised.
This was obviously my fault. I mean, the difference between the thought processes of young children and mine was so vast that it was hard to gauge “how long it would take” or “how messy the writing should be.”
No, or rather, wouldn’t that make me a genius…?
As a result, I managed to write down very accurate answers in a surprisingly decent handwriting in a much shorter time than the other kids.
The teacher was astonished, and Kagami, who saw this learning sheet, couldn’t help but be amazed.
“…Yeah.”
Then, I looked up at Kagami with a somewhat complex and subtle expression.
Kagami, whose youthful atmosphere hadn’t faded, looked even younger when she smiled like this. This made it harder for me to see her as ‘Mom.’ How could I think of someone who is much younger than my mental age as my mother?
Of course, I call her Mom when I have to. It would be too strange for a daughter to call her mother by her name.
On the other hand, Kagami very naturally thinks of me as her daughter.
That’s why my feelings about this are even more complicated.
Of course, the kindergarten teachers don’t call me a ‘genius’ yet. Some kids just grow a bit faster in their intellectual development, and those children will eventually be caught up to by others.
If you show genius at such a young age, the chances are high that you’ll just end up being normal as you grow older. Knowing this objective fact, the teachers would praise me but wouldn’t make a big deal out of it.
However, parents are different.
“Koto Ne, you’re amazing!”
Yes, parents often see their children through rose-colored glasses.
They forget what it was like when they were young and, seeing their child saying something, they wonder, “Is this kid actually a genius?”
They can think that just from watching simple actions like speaking, walking, or absorbing knowledge, so how would they feel when witnessing their child surpassing others?
“…Yeah.”
But if I clearly explain that I’m not a genius here, that would ironically be too genius-like.
Seeing Kagami’s reaction, the first feeling that hit me was fear.
Kagami… is a child going through a very difficult situation. She should still be growing up under the protection of adults, yet here she is raising someone much younger than herself.
From Kagami’s perspective, it might very well be a blessing. If things had gone wrong, both of us might have ended up in an orphanage, and then we wouldn’t have been able to live as ‘mother and daughter’ like this.
However, even if it’s a blessing, it doesn’t change the fact.
People who have it tough often cling to small hopes.
I really hope Kagami doesn’t expect too much from me. I’m just too ordinary for that.
If she builds up a huge expectation too early, what if it gets shattered later—
“Koto Ne.”
While I was lost in thought, Kagami called for me.
Her hand was gently stroking my head.
“By any chance, do you not want to study?”
“……”
Did she think that because I wasn’t saying anything?
Kagami’s voice wasn’t the kind that pressed or scolded. It was just soft, and she seemed genuinely curious.
But I couldn’t bring myself to answer that.
I still don’t even know what I want. I’m not really a child, after all. The innocence that children of my age are supposed to have has long since worn off. When was the last time I even dreamed of something?
Children can be anything, but I also know that realistically, very few children like that actually exist.
So, I really don’t know.
But—
Kagami firmly hugged me and shifted to lie on her side.
I naturally turned my body to face her. Kagami preferred this position when it was just the two of us.
As she gently stroked my head, Kagami said,
“If you don’t want to study, there’s no need to work too hard.”
“……”
“Koto Ne can still do many things, so you just need to take your time and find what you want to do.”
…What about you?
Could Kagami have found possibilities at the same age as this ‘Kurosawa Koto Ne’? Could she have dreamed of doing something she wanted to do?
No, she probably couldn’t have.
Kagami tried not to talk about her hardships in front of me, but I am somewhat perceptive. Besides, she’s not really a little kid.
Kagami had no opportunities.
Yet, is she trying to give me a chance?
I’ve heard adults often project their troubled past onto their children, making life harder for them, but Kagami doesn’t give off that kind of vibe.
Or maybe…
Maybe Kagami wants to give me everything because she has had nothing herself.
So she’s trying to do her very best.
At least for the past few years.
…
I am not a genius. Eventually, everyone will find that out.
But, even so.
Yes, there’s still time. And if I connect what I learned in my previous life with what I’m learning now to study hard, I might still be able to be a ‘good student.’
Let’s work hard.
At least so that Kagami’s devotion towards me doesn’t end up being one-sided.
I’ve felt firsthand just how hollow one-sided devotion can be in my previous life.
*
This might sound like a weird story considering I think of myself as an ‘adult,’ but I have made a friend.
To be more precise, she wasn’t a friend I actively made. After entering this kindergarten, I basically maintained my attitude of sitting alone in a corner.
The teachers worried about me, but honestly, if I ended up playing with the kids and they started crying, that would be a whole other headache.
However, maybe the kids in this kindergarten are too young to read that atmosphere.
“Hey, Koo-chan! This way!”
There was a kid pulling my hand.
Maybe it’s because I was just born into this world, or perhaps it’s because I hadn’t adapted to calling children by those cute names; I still wasn’t used to that way of naming.
In the end, the way I called people is just by their ‘name.’
“Harumi.”
Though I simply called her by the name, I still wasn’t used to calling names.
I don’t think the way shown in animations is necessarily the standard way, but the idea that ‘in foreign countries, you call surnames for those you aren’t close to’ somehow dominated my mind.
Is it okay to call someone I’ve only known for about a week by their name?
But for a young child, calling by name seems appropriate too.
“Yeah, yeah, come this way, this way.”
Her black hair swayed. It wasn’t as long as mine, but she was also growing her hair long over her shoulder.
Her skin was a bit darker than the other kids, but it’s hard to tell if it’s because she plays outside so much or if that’s just her natural color. Either way, she looked healthy like other kids her age, which was nice.
Harumi seemed to not care at all about how I referred to her and made me sit on the floor.
There were several boys nearby. There were far more girls than boys.
I obediently sat down as Harumi directed.
A few of the kids looked at me with slightly anxious faces. Especially the boys. Do I look that scary? I think I just look normally pretty.
“So, Harumi, what are we going to play?”
One of the boys asked uneasily.
“We’re going to play house!”
Ah, I see.
Now, that’s classic.
This already awkward situation just became more awkward.
I quickly took a deep breath when the other kids weren’t looking.
So… that’s it. The term ‘childhood friend’ huh.
That sounds somewhat traditional too.
…But making friends with boys might turn out awkward too. Well, how long can the connections made in kindergarten last anyway?
For now, I thought to just get along well enough not to make Kagami worry.
Upon realizing that I was assigned the role of the ‘youngest daughter,’ and most of my lines were “Waaah,” I felt more than just awkward; it felt shameful— but hey, what does it matter?
Who’s going to remember this after kindergarten anyway?
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