God,
When I am called,
Grant me the power to save a life,
Even amidst the fiercest flames.
Before it’s too late,
Let me embrace the child
And rescue the trembling old man.
Always allow me to concentrate,
So that I can hear even the faintest cries,
And quickly and efficiently extinguish fires.
Help me diligently fulfill my mission,
So that I can protect the lives and property of my neighbors.
And if my life ends according to your will,
Please take care of my wife and my only son with your gracious hand.
*
So…
I must protect that intention.
I have to do it.
*
“You’ve checked the request details, right?”
Aileen gulped down coffee that tasted like poison and drummed her fingers on the desk.
“Confidentiality… Hah, fine. I’ll take your word for it.”
Aileen’s gaze shifted to the Blacksmith.
Oh come on, not that kind of person!
She broke her eye contact with the Blacksmith and silently glared at me again.
“But if it gets leaked…”
A clacking sound came from Aileen’s mouth.
Ugh… Why is she grinding her teeth like that…
“When that happens, I can’t take responsibility either.”
“Y-yes…”
Cold sweat trickled down my back.
At least it’s a relief that Aileen isn’t a criminal.
When I went to the kitchen to get coffee earlier, I asked the Blacksmith, and the reply was, “Not a criminal!”
Yeah, “not a criminal!” Why is that emphasis there?!
Then what the hell is it?!
What’s your identity?!
A noble? Or could it be… royalty?!
Is that why you’re giving so much gold?!
My head spun with all sorts of complicated thoughts.
Sure, I’m quite knowledgeable about [Dark Sun], but… I’m not familiar with every character.
Plus, I don’t know the story… I forgot!
I only glanced at the story when I first started the game; after that, I just hunted or did PVP endlessly…
How am I supposed to remember a story I saw eight years ago?
If I had known the whole story, I wouldn’t be stuck in this tiny village…
“Huh…”
While I was clutching my complicated head, a gigantic bag thudded onto the table.
“It’s 15 gold. That’s the advance payment, and when we reach Cartia Village, I’ll give you the remaining 15 gold.”
But… that’s a ridiculously big bag for just 15 gold?
As I poked at the bag, Aileen murmured,
“Uh, um… I couldn’t prepare it in gold, so I brought it in silver. Don’t worry; the amount is correct.”
“Ha-ha… It really looks like you just took it from a piggy bank…”
As soon as I said that, Aileen jumped up, furious.
“My piggy bank?! It’s not that at all! Huh, really… What do you see me as? Hah! I’m older than I look, you know?! I’m not a child, so what’s with the piggy bank?!”
I mean, I just had to say that… Why react so strongly?
I’ve had experiences like that too!
Was it in middle school? I remember once I broke my piggy bank to run away after saving up for three years!
“I-I’m sorry…”
“Uh… no, it’s fine… I’m sorry for shouting too. Let’s get back to the main topic.”
Aileen took a moment to catch her breath and spread out a large piece of paper.
“Okay, this is the village we’re in. Right?”
Only Aileen’s finger could be seen moving, and I couldn’t see the drawing on the paper at all.
It seemed like a map, but I couldn’t see a thing…
But what if I interrupt and she gets mad again?
I must protect my 30 gold…
I should respond first, then cautiously express my thoughts once she finishes.
“Y-yes.”
“When we set out, we’ll go this way…”
Aileen’s slender finger moved swiftly.
“We’ll pass through here. Is that okay?”
“Y-yes.”
“Hmm… You seem confident. Great. Usually, we go this way, but we’ll take a direct route.”
“…Y-yes.”
“It’s a bit risky, but this route is the fastest. Then over here…”
Suddenly, Aileen’s finger paused mid-sentence, and her head slowly lowered.
“Uh, wait a minute…”
She seemed fidgety and bowed her head deeply.
“Uh, it’s not intentional… I wasn’t teasing or anything… Ah, no…”
As expected.
I must have briefly forgotten that I was blind.
Well, I have been moving around, making coffee, and all, so I could forget.
But I’m a broad-minded guy, so I’ll understand!
“It’s okay. I’m used to it…”
I lightly tapped Aileen’s hand resting on the table and smiled.
To be honest, I’m not really used to it.
I’ve only been blind for two months since I suddenly lost my sight. There’s no way I’d be used to it yet.
But saying this might make Aileen feel less guilty, right?
Well, and it’s not like she has to feel guilty at all!
We just met today, and if I had said from the start that I couldn’t see the map, this wouldn’t have happened…
Wait, did I mess this up?
“This is my fault… Aileen didn’t do anything wrong, so… y-you don’t have to apologize… I, um, am sorry…!”
I tried to comfort her kindly but stuttered badly.
By the end, I even stuttered!
Aileen looked up at me.
Did my words comfort her a bit…?
Is she laughing at my stutter…? Ugh, how embarrassing.
“Ahem.”
I awkwardly brought my cup to my mouth.
But Aileen firmly held onto my cup.
“Mr. Noah… Have you finished your milk…?”
“Oh, uh.”
Wow, she’s right.
I absentmindedly put it to my lips without even noticing my milk was gone…
“Mr. Noah… You don’t have to force yourself to smile…”
“N-no, I’m not…!”
My face turned bright red out of embarrassment.
I bowed my head, afraid my bright red face might be discovered.
Instead of offering comfort, I just stuttered like a loser…!
No!!
Panicking, I abruptly stood up.
Ugh, I can’t even look her in the eyes…
I’ve never been able to look anyone in the eyes, but anyway!
“I-I’ll bring more drinks!”
Oh.
Another stutter.
Today, I hated this clumsy body even more.
Holding the cup in both hands, I dashed to the kitchen…
“Be careful!”
Crash!
“Ugh…!”
I stumbled, forgetting my Great Sword…
Damn it, Noah! Aaaaaah!!
First… Let’s find my Great Sword… Ugh.
I crawled and felt the floor.
“Noah…?”
Aileen called out, sounding confused.
Her voice became closer than before.
Hmm… Is she nearby?
I can’t tell.
That aside, where on earth is my Great Sword!? Aah!
I wish I could ask Aileen to find my Great Sword, but… Revealing my weakness doesn’t feel right.
“Nothing… Uh, no! Hehe…”
Let’s just find the Great Sword first.
It has to be around here…
Hmm, this is the table leg… this is a chair… then…
“Ah…!”
Found it!
I jumped up and grabbed the hilt.
Looking around, Aileen was staring at me blankly, and the cup… It shattered. Ting!
Blood was also coming from my palms and knees.
I’m used to injuries like this.
But today…
It stings a bit more than usual.
*
“Be careful!”
Crash!
“Ugh…!”
Noah, holding a cup, tripped over a hammer lying on the floor.
She couldn’t have missed seeing it.
On the way to the Blacksmith, I dodged animal droppings multiple times.
I carefully crossed puddles, and she cleared all the obstacles at my feet.
So she definitely saw that hammer.
While processing the situation, Noah began crawling on the floor.
It was odd.
It shouldn’t have happened.
I knew it shouldn’t, but I couldn’t help but feel a question arise.
“Noah…?”
Hearing my voice, Noah…
Couldn’t pinpoint my location.
She could only gauge the general direction but couldn’t look at me.
Couldn’t look.
“…”
I…
I carved a painful wound in that girl’s trauma.
Talking endlessly about my piggy bank while worried it might be discovered.
I also knew about Noah’s condition from the receptionist named Hermila.
She could feel her surroundings but couldn’t see them at all.
It was natural she couldn’t see the map.
I had considered it.
But… Because of my foolish pride, I lost my composure.
I failed to consider Noah’s feelings.
I couldn’t say a single proper apology while watching Noah smile helplessly, filled with self-reproach.
Every adventurer I saw in the adventurer’s guild was rough and violent.
Noah, an innocent blind girl who couldn’t read, couldn’t see maps, couldn’t tell time, and couldn’t even recognize faces,
That little girl…
Despite all the verbal abuse and scorn she faced…
She persevered.
Without family,
With a troublesome body.
Noah, who didn’t bend and kept moving forward, was dazzling.
In this world,
She shines bright among those who only care about their own well-being.
So I…
Noah, to you,
And to everyone else who shines…
I owe you an apology.
As brilliant and beautiful as you are,
The darkness of this world looms larger.
The filth of humanity is too ugly for me.
I wouldn’t want to save this world.
Even if it crumbles, I’ll run away until the very end.
*
“Ah, that’s why it stings so much… There were shards of glass stuck in me…”
It hurt in a strange way, so I concentrated and found small shards embedded in me.
I recalled the embarrassing, disgraceful moments I had shown.
I swear… it’s so humiliating…!
“Should I just die…?”
And why does it hurt more today?!
Crazy!
How old am I now?!
Did I catch middle school syndrome or something?!
Aaaaaah!!
My bitterness was mistaken for psychological pain, but it was just the injury really hurting!
“Ugh… I feel so ashamed…”
As I brushed off the glass shards, I thought of Aileen, who would be pitifully sitting outside.
She seemed strong yet vulnerable.
She appeared thorough yet somehow clumsy.
Her heart also seemed weak…
Was she a person with a painful past she couldn’t share with others?
Well, it doesn’t really matter.
I let go of my Great Sword and relaxed.
With my eyes open,
Ears closed,
Holding my breath.
I thought to myself.
No matter what painful past Aileen carries,
Whether she’s a criminal, a saint, or a villain,
Whatever she may be, if she is ‘human,’
If she exists as a ‘person’…
I will reach out to her hand.
If she asks for help, I will give it,
And if she asks me to save her life, I will do whatever it takes.
Because I must.
In the past,
Now,
Maybe in the future,
I can’t help but do so.
“Right?”
After shaking off the glass, I grabbed my Great Sword and stood up.
“Did I drink coffee again? Should I get one more?”
I poured Aileen’s coffee and my milk into a cup, then left the kitchen.
“Is there anything I should leave behind?”
When I turned around,
What was left of my spot was…
“Uh… Nothing.”
Not even a single piece of glass shard was left.
“This time, I’ll act more confidently!”
There was no distance.
