I still don’t call Kagami “Mom.”
I don’t want to… or rather, to be honest, it’s just too embarrassing.
It’s even more embarrassing because I said, “I won’t call you Kagami.” Frankly, at that time, I was prepared to die, so that statement was somewhat of a ‘blank check’ if I may say so.
So, for now, I’m still addressing Kagami without any title.
And the best way to call someone without using a title is to not speak unless they speak first. It doesn’t mean I won’t say anything at all, but, well, I’ve naturally become less frequent in initiating a conversation.
I know it seems… like a bit of a loser move.
But it seems like Kagami doesn’t really care.
As always, Kagami was waiting for Koko and me at our house.
It’s already been two weeks since we’ve been living like this.
Slowly but surely, I’ve come to recognize that we’re a family. Living together with Kagami isn’t as uncomfortable as I thought it would be.
By the time we both get home, Kagami prepares the bathwater and gets dinner ready while we take turns washing up.
When I get home, Kagami’s cooking skills have improved quite a lot—it’s even gotten to the point where I think, “This is good enough not to get criticized for selling it.”
It feels a bit strange to think that praise comes from me and Koko.
After leisurely washing up and drying off, I smelled the dinner Kagami had prepared.
Tonight’s dinner was curry.
“Looks delicious!”
Koko exclaimed with sparkling eyes.
“Meow.”
Kuro, who was eating her own food, meowed at Koko’s shout. Her gaze was fixed on the table.
Maybe she was curious about the taste of the curry?
I was worried she might jump up, but she soon lost interest and bent down to crunch on her kibble again.
Kagami looked at Koko with a warm smile. It was a picture of a mother enjoying watching her child eat.
I followed Koko’s lead and took a bite of the curry mixed with rice, then stared at Kagami for a moment.
It seemed the government was not particularly interested in interfering with Kagami.
Kosuzu’s organization had completely fallen apart. Not only did they lose the center that was Kosuzu, but prior to that, Kosuzu had already been draining and reorganizing the members, resulting in their power gradually diminishing.
Unlike ordinary cults, the pseudo-religion led by Kosuzu wasn’t about money; it had a ‘real’ religious purpose, and its followers would risk their lives to achieve that goal.
In some sense, they even worshiped a real god. Everyone from the priests to each devoted follower endured pain and death out of their fanatical faith, which ultimately led to their failure.
What can I say? It was bound to fall apart.
On the other hand, Kagami’s influence is still intact.
The member of parliament who has an acquaintance with Kagami seems fine, and most importantly, the Yamashita clan hasn’t crumbled yet.
I don’t know how things will change over time, but for now, Kagami, who is busy dealing with the aftermath of the previous incident, seems to have been pushed to the back burner.
…Time freezing, with people unaware of why that incident happened or how it unfolded, has turned out to be a stroke of luck for Kagami.
“Why are you looking at me like that?”
While wanting to hear the title of ‘Mom,’ Kagami didn’t change her tone with us at all.
“Oh, it’s nothing.”
And I’m still using informal speech.
I’ve never been the type to use formal language with family, even from my previous life.
“…How’s work going?”
I thought it’d be better to ask something else before the atmosphere turned awkward by bringing up my resurrection.
Honestly, I was a little curious.
Before, I could just go over to see Kagami at her workplace, but now she doesn’t go there at all.
We don’t even leave her behind at home. If I wake up in the middle of the night, Kagami is there sleeping beside me. For at least the last two weeks, it seems she hasn’t been working at all.
“Would you prefer if I went there?”
She turned my question back on me.
I thought for a moment.
I have come to regard Kagami as a kind of family, albeit still struggling to see her as a real mom.
So for now, even if Kagami told me she was going there, it wouldn’t bother me that much.
But—
Kagami was watching me.
Her eyes were wide open—much more than they usually are.
It could be interpreted as an expression of excitement or anticipation, but honestly, it’s a bit scary to see Kagami making that kind of expression.
“…No.”
I thought I’d give the answer I believed was right.
Kagami seemed a bit pleased. Thank goodness for that.
I tried to focus back on eating, but Kagami spoke up again.
“By the way, why did you ask that?”
Wouldn’t that kind of remark usually come first?
If the earlier question carried a sense of expectation, this time it felt genuine curiosity.
“Just thought. I might go there later. You never know what could happen in life.”
So I gave a vague answer this time.
Part of it was a joke too. I probably wouldn’t end up working there. If I brought up the idea of working there, Yuka would definitely come charging in, slap me on the back, and drag me out to make me work at her mom’s place.
“…”
But right after answering, I felt a sticky gaze on me, and when I turned my head, Kagami was looking at me with a frozen smile.
Her expression was smiling, but the atmosphere was not.
“Uuh?”
It seemed even Koko, who had been diligently eating her curry without a care in the world, sensed something was off and looked at Kagami.
“I’m just joking, a joke!”
“Is that so?”
With my words, Kagami’s atmosphere slowly calmed down again.
However, it didn’t return to the same atmosphere as before.
Hmm.
I guess I shouldn’t say such things in front of Kagami.
Come to think of it, while I don’t see her as a mom, Kagami accepts me as her true daughter.
If my daughter said something like that, I would have reacted similarly.
I had some comments I wanted to make about Kagami operating that place, but I decided to just bury it deep in my heart.
“Hey, you know, like Fukuda. Isn’t there a lot of people who would miss her? She was pretty popular, right?”
“Um… That’s true.”
After a brief moment of thought, Kagami suddenly looked at me and spoke.
“Are you saying that it’s not enough to just have a mom, and you need a dad too?”
I almost spat out my curry.
“Well, I’d prefer if you could just hold off on that for now. I don’t plan on getting married anytime soon.”
“No, that’s not it.”
“Of course, it might be tempting to live in Fukuda’s house since it’s so big and all.”
I briefly imagined myself moving into Fukuda’s house.
Would that make Fukuda… my sister?
I frowned.
Since I still can’t bring myself to call Kagami ‘Mom,’ if Fukuda called me her younger sister, it would be incredibly awkward in many ways.
Although it seems she’s not particularly keen on the idea of making me her little sister from the start.
Plus, there’s my relationship with Yuuki. He seems to have a lot of thoughts about me on this front too. Though I wanted to have a serious chat about this afterward, I had Kagami and Koko here, and Yuuki had Mako and Fukuda with him, making it difficult to have a proper serious conversation.
“…Nah, I guess I don’t need to worry about that.”
“I’m glad you feel that way.”
Is she thinking about getting married if I say I need it?
For now, I think these three are enough. Occasionally having friends over to sleep is more than enough.
If I keep this conversation going, it feels like the topic will spiral into a strange direction, so I decided not to say anything further and just eat.
*
Sunday morning.
I’m not really sure how many days the workers in this country work a week, but students still go to school until Saturday.
Of course, for someone like me, Sundays are very important. Staying up late the night before, then sleeping in until late on Sunday…
Until now, I’ve managed to maintain some kind of lifestyle. I had a part-time job.
However, ever since I started living with Kagami, I haven’t been worried about money at all, so I didn’t have to stress much about my part-time job.
By adjusting my schedule to work only three days a week during weekdays, I feel much more at ease. Especially the fact that I can finish early on Saturdays and rest on Sundays feels greatly satisfying.
Though Kagami’s money is still coming from donations from her followers, most of those followers are either related to Yamashita or politicians. Given that the cult’s ‘goal’ has been shattered, it’ll be hard to remain a pseudo-religion any longer.
It seems Kagami is pushing ahead with her long-anticipated proper religious transformation. The fact that Kurosawa has started to make some changes to her mansion is likely due to that.
Maybe she’s trying to bring in the exorcists. Since Kagami is handling it herself, I won’t interfere.
Returning to the point, anyway, I planned to savor this comfortable Sunday—until Kagami shook my shoulders to wake me up.
“Uugh?”
I was startled and let out a silly sound as I opened my eyes.
Kagami, not smiling at all—though to be honest, she always wears a smile—looked at me and said, “Wake up. We have something important to do today.”
At that, Kagami was wearing a wide-brimmed hat.
“Something important?”
When I couldn’t grasp the meaning of her words, Kagami nodded.
Then I noticed she was wearing a white dress.
How should I put it? If I were to draw a picnic basket, it’d fit the impression of someone leisurely eating sandwiches in the middle of a green meadow.
But since it’s late January, it’s more likely we won’t be able to do that due to the cold weather.
“Today is a day for going out.”
“…Really?”
I sat up from my spot. As I rubbed my eyes, my vision slowly cleared up. I was adapting to the light peeking through my eyelids, so it wasn’t blindingly bright.
“Is there such a day?”
I asked with a groggy voice.
Japan doesn’t celebrate the Lunar New Year like Korea does. The first day of the lunar calendar is New Year’s Day, right?
“There isn’t one, no.”
Kagami’s voice was quite serious.
“But we promised, right?”
For a moment there, I racked my brain trying to recall if I really had made such a promise with Kagami. No, no matter how hard I thought, I can’t remember a thing.
If Kagami told me, “Let’s go for a picnic,” I wouldn’t possibly forget that because it would be an extraordinarily unusual statement.
“I’m talking about me and the self from that time.”
“….”
So it means she just didn’t tell me about it.
I scratched my head and yawned before clumsily getting up.
Well, if Kagami wants a family outing, I don’t mind it either. I also like to enjoy myself in my own way.
Moreover, I have a kind of debt to Kagami. The last time I fought, she rushed in with a mirror and showed me my reflection, allowing me to find myself. Although I was able to maintain my ego with the help of the blood of the Sasaki siblings, without that mirror, I probably wouldn’t have been fully aware of myself.
When I got up, I noticed Koko was still soundly asleep.
She looked cute, lying there with her mouth slightly open and hugging the blanket.
She looks just like me.
“The water is ready.”
I shivered slightly at Kagami’s attentiveness as I went to wash up.
Ignoring the rustling sound, Kuro was sleeping in a strange position on the floor.
I’m a bit envious.
*
Despite claiming there was a promise to go out, it seemed Kagami had no real destination in mind.
Thinking quietly about Kagami’s mindset, she probably longed for a ‘normal family routine.’
It wasn’t a special outing with a plan to go somewhere; it was just a casual, light trip sparked by a passing thought of, “Should we go out for a bit?”
At first, we wandered around our neighborhood.
The apartment was under Kagami’s name, but she seemed to have never walked around this area at all.
Well, it’s hard to imagine Kagami wandering around the neighborhood without any particular purpose.
As we walked around the neighborhood, I explained various things.
Like the convenience store nearby or a mart with good prices. Kagami seemed to already know about the mart, which surprised me a little.
For some reason, Koko’s eyes sparkled with excitement even at places she had been to with me before.
“Shall we go to Tokyo?”
After taking a round around the neighborhood, Kagami suggested.
Since we left early in the morning, there was still plenty of time. Koko was in good spirits, and Kuro wasn’t expected to cause any trouble at home for a day, so I nodded in agreement.
Fortunately, there weren’t too many people on the train.
Koko, me, and Kagami.
Sitting side by side, staring blankly out the window felt somewhat novel.
Now that I think about it, how long has it been since I felt like this?
An adult buys the tickets for you, and you ride the train, being guided to a fun place without having to think.
It’s a feeling I hadn’t experienced in a long time.
Honestly, high school students don’t really have such opportunities—
I glanced up at Kagami sitting next to me.
Noticing my gaze, Kagami looked down at me with a proud smile.
She said she wanted to be a mom.
Of course, she must be eager to experience the things she hasn’t had a chance to do as a mom.
“What a wow!”
At last, there’s still a child sitting nearby with all her innocence intact.
Well, to be precise, I might say it seems she has retained her innocence rather than just having it.
It wouldn’t be accurate to say ‘retained’ since it hasn’t been long since she became like this.
Koko was squatting on the seat, looking out the window just like little kids do. She was sitting in a position contrary to the direction of the seated passengers, like on her knees.
Even though it’s something I see every day, it looks different when you say we’re going out to play.
Indeed, it looks different enough to matter. Since we were riding the train at the time when it’s usually crowded.
“Koko, you should sit properly.”
“Uuh.”
When I said that, Koko puffed out her cheeks, showing discontent, but she still sat obediently.
“….”
I felt a strange gaze, and when I turned my head, Kagami was looking at me with a peculiar expression.
What’s this?
Is she perhaps wishing to say something?
Although she didn’t outright puff out her cheeks, there was a kind of atmosphere that suggested it.
I sensed a bit of a vibe like she’s a big kid herself.
Now that I think about it, did Kagami actually graduate from school properly? I feel like Kosuzu would have made sure of that.
Better not to ask so she doesn’t get hurt.
Thinking this way, I turned my gaze back again.
*
The place we had come to together was Odaiba.
It was also a place I had visited alone in the past. It was hot then, and now it’s the complete opposite.
I’m not alone, which is also a change.
The winter sea has its own charm, just like the winter itself.
If I were alone, it would feel unbearably lonely, but having someone by my side makes it feel different.
Slurp.
I sipped the can of coffee in my hand that Kagami deliberately bought warm for me.
From behind, it also felt nice to be with an adult.
Though it’s a bit of an awkward notion to have, it really feels like I’m returning to my childhood.
“Kotone, Kotone.”
Koko grabbed my arm and pulled me.
When I turned my attention, I saw Kagami waving her hand from a bit further away. I was wondering where she had gone, and it seemed she was searching for something.
When I walked over with Koko, Kagami, with an excited expression, said, “Shall we get something to eat?”
It was a little early for lunch, but it was not impossible.
Since I thought I’d follow Kagami’s lead today, I nodded eagerly.
Kagami seemed to be enjoying herself, leading us to an ordinary tonkatsu place with nothing special.
By now, I was sure.
Kagami yearns for ‘normalcy.’
She didn’t show it outwardly.
As we entered, guided to our seats, we sat side by side, Koko and I, with Kagami across from us.
Kagami always smiled, but looking at her now, I felt like I could distinguish between her genuine and fake smiles. There was a considerable difference in naturalness.
The prices were a little higher than usual, and the food was just ordinary.
But that very ordinariness must have been what Kagami cherished the most.
I had experienced it, but Kagami had not.
“How is it? Is it delicious?”
She asked, without even tasting her own food, her eyes filled with expectation.
“It’s delicious!”
Koko exclaimed, her eyes sparkling as she said that.
“…It’s tasty.”
When I said that, smiling for no particular reason, Kagami finally started to eat with a content expression.
“….”
I also watched her for a moment before picking up a piece of tonkatsu with my chopsticks and took a bite.
For some reason, it strangely tasted better than the first time I had it.
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