Of course it’s a guy.
Hwa-rin, it’s true that I created a poisonous friend with my rich imagination, but I can’t create a female friend due to a lack of data.
‘I thought you’d definitely ask about pineapple pizza first!’
I even had excuses ready for that, but I got an unexpected question and I’m all flustered.
Have I ever told Hwa-rin that my poisonous friend is a guy? As I think about it, I don’t think I have.
Of course, the image of my poisonous friend in my mind is the son of Hyang-a, who died at the hands of bandits. He’s also Joseon, has a tragic birth secret, and faced an unfortunate death.
‘Why is Hwa-rin suddenly asking weird questions?’
Is she doubting me? I’ve shown her too many lies too often. To Hwa-rin, there might be some suspicious parts in my setting.
The careless multiverse setting of Kang Yoon-ho that I hastily created might make Lady Tang feel uneasy.
Should I just say the poisonous friend is a guy?
Kang Yoon-ho’s crisis sensor isn’t ringing the alarm, but something feels off. Saying the poisonous friend is a guy could be like walking into a minefield unprotected.
“What’s that about?”
Instead of directly answering that the poisonous friend is a guy, I stepped back and asked her like I was searching.
“So it is a girl.”
Hwa-rin concluded as if she knew everything.
“What are you talking about?”
“You hesitated just now. I saw everything. If it were a guy, you’d have answered immediately, but since it’s a girl, you hesitated, right?”
Lady Tang spoke with a tone of conviction as if she were a detective. Hwa-rin, it’s great that you caught the hesitation, but your direction is completely wrong.
“What are you talking about? It’s a guy.”
I first denied to clear up Hwa-rin’s misunderstanding. However, I spoke in a light tone to leave a gap. If there were real solid grounds, I wanted to leave room for modification.
“Are you going to lie to me as well?”
Hwa-rin glared at me, pretending to be angry and wide-eyed.
“Why do you think that?”
Tell me why you’re so sure.
“Actually, I’ve suspected it for a while… But after hearing the story about the guard unit today, I’m certain.”
“What did the guard unit say?”
“The Color Demon. Remember when they said there was a problem with his head?”
Hwa-rin seems to really think of the Color Demon as her father. I thought it might bother her, but she speaks with such a casual tone about the Color Demon.
“Can’t control his emotions?”
“Yeah. I’ve seen something similar in the poisonous manufacturing document that Tang Geoh hid from the head of the Seong family.”
Men possess the Yang nature, thereby taking the poison with Yang energy, while women take the opposite, with Yin energy. After creating a body that can withstand the poison from an opposite spirit, they consume that poison.
Hwa-rin briefly explained the complicated process of making poisonous beings to me.
“The Color Demon was a guy, so he must have consumed the poison filled with Yang energy.”
“Yeah. If one consumes poison filled with Yang energy for a long time, it stimulates the brain. This leads to difficulties in controlling impulses, just like the Color Demon.”
“Aha.”
“You definitely said that before the kid died, there was a close interaction between you two. If that’s the case, he wouldn’t have had issues in his mind, which means the poisonous person must be a girl.”
Hwa-rin slightly lowered her head and cautiously looked at me with her eyes rolled up. Is she asking if I still won’t speak the truth?
“…”
Should I say that the poisonous friend also had impulse control issues because he was a guy? Saying that conflicts with the memories of the friend I mentioned to Hwa-rin.
As I kept silent, Hwa-rin opened her mouth again.
“And by the way, do you know what your expression is like when you occasionally think about that friend? No matter how close you are, you’d never make that expression.”
Hwa-rin emphasized as she interrupted her speech, pointing it out clearly.
‘That’s because I think of So-hee when I’m acting emotional.’
There are just too many situations weighing on my mind. Like thinking of the unfortunate fate of So-hee when I’m empathizing with my poor friend or recalling So-hee while Hwa-rin is healing.
‘Should I say the poisonous friend is a girl?’
At this point, it feels like I’ve been put in a corner. I need to change my plan.
Let’s review the poisonous friend’s setting. The setting I prepared. The one I mentioned. Is there anything that changes if the gender is swapped? No. Are there any contradictions? No.
Other than the poisonous friend’s name, changing the gender doesn’t significantly alter what I’ve prepared.
Then I might as well admit it straightforwardly.
“Yeah. That’s right. It’s a girl.”
I nodded along, grinning like a criminal admitting the truth to a detective.
———————
After a brief moment of silence, Hwa-rin opened her mouth.
“Why did you lie about your friend being a guy?”
Well, it’s because I set it that way.
“You didn’t think I needed to know.”
“That, why don’t I need to know?”
“We’re about to enter a tiger’s den. I need to play the role of the Tang Family Head’s illegitimate child, and if you know that the illegitimate child is a girl, you might unconsciously give it away or make a mistake. The risks outweigh the relief of revealing the truth.”
“What about before? You could have told me before today.”
Hwa-rin bit her lower lip slightly and looked up at me. Is she feeling betrayed for not being told about her friend being a girl?
It’d be troublesome if I fell out with Hwa-rin in this situation. I need to think of a convincing excuse.
“I’ve never once thought of that kid as a girl. That’s why whenever I talk about memories with that kid, there’s no reason for me to say she was a girl or a young girl.”
“But!”
I know. Each time I think of that kid, I had such an emotional expression. I’ve just made an excuse for that.
I turned my head towards the window with a wistful expression, avoiding Hwa-rin’s gaze and began to speak.
“However…”
“However?”
“My puberty came after that kid died. That’s all.”
A crush that could never be first love. A guy who experienced painful adolescence more than anyone. A guy who keeps the love he realized too late in his heart.
With regret and sorrow, I smiled at Hwa-rin.
“…huh?”
Hwa-rin’s jaw dropped as if she had been hit by a hammer after hearing my words.
I said he was a friend, but when I recalled, the expression I wore was affectionate. Hwa-rin, isn’t that enough of a setting for you to understand?
Let’s be satisfied with roughly this setting and move on to the next story.
There are too many things to prepare before we invade the tiger’s den.
*
You liked him.
A sharp pain submerged into her heart. I shouldn’t have asked. The curiosity that had been bothering her like a thorn lodged in her shoe now burrowed into her flesh.
Lady Tang could understand everything that had happened until now from the sad smile on his face.
Even during their arrogant first meeting, he couldn’t pass her by, and coming to save her in a crisis, showing up again with the antidote despite being refused.
She finally realized that she was in a similar position to his precious friend, and that was why he exerted himself to help her.
He must have seen her reflected in himself.
The grand ritual of atonement he had mentioned wasn’t the true emotion; it was a different feeling that he helped her with.
The sharp pain tightened around her chest.
“What’s your name?”
Lady Tang asked once more about her, as if picking at a scab to check the wound.
“Huh?”
“What’s your friend’s name?”
“Uh….”
Kang Yoon-ho looked like he was thinking hard. It wasn’t that he couldn’t recall the name. Then why was it difficult to say?
Is it because he didn’t want to share the name of a person who was only remembered by her? A cold wind blew through Lady Tang’s heart.
“Say it.”
Lady Tang was startled by her own icy voice that came out of her mouth.
“It’s Tang Ga-gi. He was a kid who liked to joke around.”
“He was an upright child, right?”
“Haha, he joked a lot with me.”
He’s an upright child but joked a lot with him. That must mean they were close. Lady Tang felt her heart sting from the reminder of her budding feelings.
“What happened to pineapple pizza? That’s a dish that only those with Sichuan Tang blood should eat.”
“My friend made me eat it forcibly. He said if we wanted to be friends, how can we not eat this, and forced me to eat it while we played together. Before I knew it, I started to enjoy it.”
“Is that really how it works?”
“Haha. Even when he was seriously ill, I had a slice of pineapple pizza next to him, laughing as he suffered. I forced myself to eat it just to see that face. Later, I ended up eating pineapple pizza on the anniversary of his death, and now I can eat it well, but I don’t have a friend to eat it with…”
Kang Yoon-ho gazed out the window with a wistful expression.
Lady Tang slightly bit her lips at that sight in silence.
She had heard of it.
In the end, pineapple pizza isn’t poison but a dish. If there runs Sichuan Tang blood, one can enjoy pineapple pizza, but even without that blood, there’s a way.
The chef who makes pineapple pizza must endure a long period of discomfort to eat it.
However, few cooks actually follow this painful and long path.
Even if the pineapple pizza would seem disgusting without Sichuan blood, they shared a bond strong enough to eat it together. Kang Yoon-ho had walked that difficult and lengthy path for his friend.
‘It wasn’t an empty space from the beginning.’
The empty space in Kang Yoon-ho’s heart. The void that had hollowed out after the poisonous friend had disappeared. Lady Tang thought she might be able to burrow into that void.
It was a delusion.
There was no space for her to fit into that man’s heart. He would walk down a street, looking for someone resembling her, and while writing, he would think of her, soaking in his thoughts of her from time to time.
His heart was full of her.
Is there a way to surpass the dead?
A deep sense of defeat began to seep into Lady Tang’s ankles.
“Hwa-rin!”
However, the one who could pull Lady Tang from defeat and into gratefulness was none other than one man.
Kang Yoon-ho called her when a shadow crossed her face.
“Yeah?”
“I’m sorry for dragging you into this gloom. My friend is my friend, and we should think about our futures.”
“…”
The swamp of rising defeat. Kang Yoon-ho smiled at Lady Tang and extended his hand out.
“Are you going to keep doing this? Hwa-rin, I’m sorry for not saying earlier. Please help me a little, okay? Hwa-rin, without you, I’m really in big trouble. Please save my friend, okay?”
Kang Yoon-ho said dramatically, restlessly. It was so exaggerated that it was unmistakably forced, but it was effective for her, who had fallen into the swamp of defeat because of her low self-esteem.
‘This isn’t the time. Yoon-ho needs me.’
He who had helped her was in trouble. She couldn’t sit around idly. Lady Tang held onto Yoon-ho’s outstretched hand and emerged from the swamp of defeat.
“Okay. I’ll help.”
Lady Tang said with a small smile.
“Really?”
“Well, since my friend’s mother moved to Joseon while pregnant, the Tang family doesn’t know whether a boy or a girl was born, right? As long as I keep my mouth shut, it’ll be fine. Just trust me. I’ll help.”
“I’m so glad to have you on my side, Hwa-rin.”
Kang Yoon-ho let out a sigh of relief as Lady Tang seemed to find her spirit again.
“What are you saying? I’m always on your side.”
“There’s no one like you!”
As Kang Yoon-ho jokingly tried to hug Lady Tang, she subtly evaded and laughed.
“Snicker. What are you talking about? Seriously. Now, tell me what you plan to do.”
Lady Tang eagerly looked at Yoon-ho, who was desperately explaining his plan.
Yeah. This isn’t the time for defeat.
Of course, I might not be his only friend.
But no matter what, I will save him.
Because Kang Yoon-ho is my one and only.
*
The story about friends had nearly hit a snag, but thankfully, we got through it well.
Hwa-rin enthusiastically discussed future plans with me. Occasionally, she stared at me with a bittersweet gaze, but since I had become the one who was forcibly eating pineapple pizza, I decided to let it slide.
“What are you going to do tomorrow? Don’t you need some time?”
Hwa-rin asked in a concerned tone.
“I have a method in mind.”
Temporary closure requires time. Additionally, even if things go wrong, there must be a safety net that guarantees our lives.
“How will you do it?”
“You’ll see tomorrow.”
[This is Ho Pil….]
“Another explosion, damn it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”
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