When I was young, there were parts of Light Novels that I couldn’t understand.
They talked about the importance of ordinary days, or how they would protect their normal lives.
It made me wonder why they would say such things when they were equipped with powers that ordinary people could never hope to have, surrounded by cute girls just for breathing, with families that lacked nothing.
To me, living an ordinary and boring life, that story just didn’t resonate.
Unfortunately, the high school I attended was an all-boys school, so there was no room for adorable beings like “cute girls” to slip in.
And even if they were cute girls in a co-ed school, there was no reason for them to talk to me.
I longed for an extraordinary life while not even knowing what “ordinary” truly meant.
It took me way too long to realize just how valuable that ordinary life was.
They say valuable things are always close by, and people only regret losing them after they’ve slipped away.
That was the case in my previous life.
The road back was a perfectly ordinary one.
Of course, the school I attended was nothing like the high school I knew. It wasn’t just because it was co-ed; it wasn’t even because it was a high school in Japan.
Hanagawa High School was a unique institution, one that seemed ripped straight from a Light Novel or manga.
From a general perspective, there were plenty of things that weren’t ordinary at all.
But the word “ordinary” isn’t absolute.
Everyone has a repetitive day-to-day life, and it’s that repetitive life that we can call “ordinary.”
For me, it felt like before losing my family in an instant.
In this world, my friends would be the same.
They were all safe. That was plenty enough.
“Meow.”
As if reading my thoughts, Kuro mewled softly.
“Shh.”
I whispered into my bag.
I was glad I brought a big backpack. Otherwise, I wouldn’t have had the slightest idea how to carry Kuro along.
…No, I couldn’t even figure out how I had gotten this far.
As for getting to Tokyo from Saitama, well, okay, that could happen. Even if someone was walking, they could cover that distance after several hours of hard walking.
But from Saitama to Kyoto?
Even taking the Shinkansen from Tokyo to Kyoto takes just over two hours. For a cat to navigate that distance, and on top of that, pinpoint my location exactly? That’s absurd.
“You came along on your own free will, right? Just put up with a little discomfort.”
If I had genuinely thought Kuro was just an ordinary cat, I would have somehow bought a pet carrier. After all, putting my cat in a bag and taking her out seemed like clear animal abuse. Plus, it would have violated the rules.
But Kuro was certainly not an ordinary cat.
…Well, I could deal with her being in the bag.
Honestly, I debated leaving her behind for a moment. If it was a magical cat that could instantaneously return from Saitama to Kyoto, then it should be able to go back the other way too.
However, if I did that and she didn’t follow me, I’d feel pretty bad about it.
Moreover—
“Getting in the bag and following me around? What a troublemaker.”
Indeed. Kuro had vanished right when I was discharged and casually appeared in the room where we were staying.
I pretended to be surprised—though it wasn’t hard to pull off. I really was surprised—and had to make excuses that Kuro had just slipped into my bag before I knew it, and thankfully, the kids sharing the room believed it.
In all honesty, they had no choice but to believe it. There was no other explanation.
One reason I had put Kuro in the bag was that the lodging was a no-pets-allowed place, and it was the only way I could bring her out. If I had taken her out in a carrier, it would announce that I had brought a pet, which would cause Suzuki-sensei a headache.
Being as smart as she was, Kuro would surely understand that much.
I handed my bag over to Fukuda, who was staring at it intently.
Fukuda’s face flushed as they opened the zipper just a bit to peek inside at Kuro.
Though she had grown a bit since coming to our home, she was still a young cat. Shoved inside the bag, she must have looked very cute.
When Fukuda poked their finger into the opened zipper, I could see Kuro’s little black paw moving up to catch it.
Watching Fukuda from the side, Yamashita must have wanted to join in because they quietly slipped their finger in as well.
…Goodness.
Just from seeing that behavior, they really did look like a cat.
“Ugh.”
Just like how I had doubts about Kuro, Koko seemed to have her own questions.
The way she tilted her head while looking at the bag seemed quite significant.
…Kuro, the cat who had been cared for by the protagonist’s younger sister.
If I thought about it, she had come to my aid dramatically during a crisis.
Had I stolen that cat in the middle of all of this?
Cats do occasionally appear in the Cthulhu Mythos.
Let’s see…
There was a short story about an old couple who abused cats and were eaten without leaving a trace by a hoard of them.
“……”
I stared at the bag that contained Kuro with an unsettling feeling.
“Oh, sorry. Have we been holding you too long? Here.”
Noting my gaze, Fukuda stopped playing with Kuro and handed the bag back to me.
Yamashita gazed at the bag a bit sadly. Speaking of which, I’d felt some affection for Yamashita since the first time we met.
Well, it was a baby cat after all. Unless someone had an extreme aversion to cats, most people would end up liking even just the sight of one.
Having briefly contemplated leaving the cat with Yamashita, I quickly discarded the idea.
Giving her to someone else would be considered abuse too, right?
Receiving the bag back from Fukuda, I stole another glance inside.
The light in the bag reflected in Kuro’s eyes, making them shine yellow.
“……”
I hope she wouldn’t think that putting her in the bag was any abuse too?
*
After our school trip, we debated whether or not we should hang out, and decided to part ways for now to rest from the journey.
I thought the school might have been aware that we wouldn’t study well if we went right back after the trip, so it was temporarily closed for a day. After all, they also took a day off for the founding anniversary; a single day off for the school’s discretion probably wasn’t a problem.
Either way, we wouldn’t have an actual break except for that one day from vacation.
Plus, with the part-time job taking the day off until tomorrow, I decided to meet my friends then.
Once I got home, washed up, and dried my hair just enough, I sat in front of Kuro.
Kuro, already curled up on the table I had spread out, looked bored as if she already knew what I was about to say.
I was a little irritated even before I started talking. That said, I didn’t want to get mad or anything. If she really was some divine entity, the last thing I wanted was to provoke her.
“Kuro?”
I called out to her again.
“Meow.”
“No, not the cat sounds.”
I said with a serious expression.
“Can’t you say something I can understand?”
“Meow.”
Does she think I’m going to understand cat language? No, no way that she could even think that could happen.
“If you’re just going to act like a cat, you’d better not even try.”
I said that.
“Then I wouldn’t be confused like this.”
“Koto Ne?”
Upon hearing my words, Koko tilted her head in confusion from the side.
“……”
I paused for a moment.
Kuro, who had previously been distracted, was now seriously looking at me.
…Yeah.
I loved the ordinary. I longed for a life that would never become special.
The type of life where family could occasionally come together and share a meal just like before I lost mine in my previous life.
However, whenever I actually had family by my side, there were times I wanted to be alone too.
I knew that was a nasty thought. To crave something so desperately, yet sometimes wish it wasn’t there—a horrible thought.
When I first began living alone, I felt uncomfortable when my family would visit my place. I got annoyed when my mom pointed out the state of my room, felt uneasy if my dad would sit there looking uncomfortable, and sometimes even got angry at my younger sister’s nagging.
It was only after losing all of that at once, that I began to long for it again. Strangely enough, the thought I’d had back then was something like “Once I have it back, I won’t even think about that again.”
It was the same now.
Even though I had finally stopped being alone,
I didn’t want to be disturbed while I talked to Kuro.
I shut my eyes for a moment, letting my mind settle.
…Yeah. Don’t do that. Don’t think like that. I don’t want to leave a bad memory like that with Koko either.
But then—
In that case—
“……”
“……Please.”
Yeah, what was there to hide?
After all, she was just a girl from the same place. If the cat was anything but ordinary, Koko was probably the sort who should know that.
I decided to speak plainly.
“I’ve been really confused lately. There are too many things I need to think about, right? I don’t know if you’re out to kill me or what you want to do with me. I still don’t really understand what Kosuzu is thinking.”
Kuro’s ears perked up.
Koko, who was sitting beside me, wore a blank expression as she looked at me.
To not lock eyes with Koko, I focused straight on Kuro and continued speaking.
“To be honest, I really don’t know what I should do going forward. I have some knowledge about the future, but that’s all there is. There’s so much that’s still unknown. I mean, if I only know the result, what good is that? Kosuzu, the Cult, and that guy haven’t told me anything at all.”
As I began to spit it all out, the words flowed easily.
I quickly shut my mouth and glanced at Koko.
This side of me would be the first Koko had seen. No, there was no one in this world who had seen this side of me.
Even in my previous life’s family, I hardly ever spoke like this.
But… I found it difficult to endure without venting it all out even a little.
Especially at a time like this.
“So, at least about you, I’d like to know more. The others… they’re all far away.”
The enemies like Kosuzu were naturally not around, and Kagami was fundamentally not nearby either.
Most of my friends lived in a different world. Even if they might know a bit about our identities or had lightly stepped into this world, it was still different.
I didn’t want to drag those kids into a bloody world.
As for Yuka… Yuka had far too much to shoulder to protect this world. There was no need to add to her worries.
So, for now, it was still something I had to handle on my own.
“You’re here with us, so couldn’t you say something to relieve my worries?”
“……Koto Ne……”
Koko repeated my name vacantly.
I smiled faintly at Koko. Unfortunately, it seemed things weren’t going well. Koko’s expression darkened after looking at my face.
Perhaps I had spoken too much unnecessarily. Especially at a time when Koko was next to me.
I felt a slight regret.
“……”
I silently stared at Kuro. Kuro continued to lie curled up, staring at me intently.
Was it just my feeling, or did her eyes seem a little wider?
Yet, even after staring for a long time, Kuro said nothing to me.
“……Huh.”
I let out a heavy sigh.
Yeah, that’s right.
After all, none of the people around me were likely to say anything concrete.
Should I maybe call Kagami?
If I entered the depths of the Cult, they could potentially offer me solid information.
“……Are you hungry? Let’s eat.”
With that, I rose from my seat.
I made my way to the kitchen and filled a bowl with cat food. Kuro followed me out of the room, lazily poking her face into her food bowl and crunching away.
I opened the fridge.
…There were still some cheap cuts of meat I bought earlier.
Let’s eat meat today.
I had just returned from Kyoto. After three days of indulging in delicious food, there was no way I could suddenly serve Koko a vegetarian meal.
*
“Koto Ne.”
“Yeah.”
At night.
After clearing the table and laying down a blanket, Koko spoke up.
Maybe it was because of my earlier lamentations about Kuro, but there was a hint of concern in Koko’s voice.
Now I was making Koko worry as well.
I let out a heavy sigh inwardly.
“Are you having a hard time?”
“…No, not at all.”
I answered Koko’s statement.
“But earlier…”
“……”
I hesitated for a moment before responding.
“…I just had those thoughts for a brief moment. I’m fine now.”
“Ugh.”
Koko seemed not to believe my words.
“You don’t have to worry. Really, it’s nothing at all.”
That emotion I had felt.
I spoke in a way to hide the feelings of wanting to be all alone, in the midst of it all.
“Right now, truly, it’s nothing.”
I lied.
“……Ugh.”
Only after I said that did Koko respond.
Of course, her voice wasn’t indifferent at all.
I really regretted saying that.
*
A dream.
Lately, I’ve been having dreams often.
The fortunate thing about this one was that it wasn’t one where my family was slaughtered.
Instead, the setting was a place I often frequented.
Yeah, it was this old apartment where I lived.
The reason I thought I was dreaming here was that Koko was always missing when I was here.
Had it not been a dream, I would have woken up either in the morning or during the night.
……
It was odd that I could be aware of dreaming within a dream.
“Meow.”
There was a sound I often heard when I was at home.
Before I knew it, I was sitting at the table.
And before my eyes, there was Kuro.
“……”
Last time I had a dream, I met Nirlas.
“…Kuro?”
I cautiously tried to speak.
Kuro gazed at me for a long time.
The look in her eyes felt a bit conscious. Normally, Kuro looked entirely uninterested, sprawled out lazily in a sunny spot. It was obvious that the emotion reflected in her gaze would typically be ‘annoyance.’
The only time I would ever see her eyes sparkle like that was when I occasionally had a snack in my hand.
“…I want to ask you something.”
I asked innocently, without expectation, but then Kuro spoke.
Well, did I even say that?
It sounded more like someone had dubbed over Kuro’s voice in a video.
Her mouth didn’t move, but the voice came out.
“Do you think cats can speak human language?”
“…Huh?”
“Cats have a different vocal structure, don’t they?”
Kuro’s tail twitched as she tapped her neck.
It was a natural thing, though Kuro’s tail didn’t grow that long. The thought of it stretching out like a rubber band didn’t feel gross at all.
“What else could a cat say aside from meowing?”
Kuro then made a sound as though to show me, “Meow~.”
No matter how I heard it, it sounded like ‘myaa,’ not ‘meow,’ but at the moment, I couldn’t make a fuss over something so trivial.
“…Well then, how about transforming into a human?”
“Right in front of you? Just like that?”
Kuro questioned back.
I was at a loss for words for a moment.
Is that not allowed?
“If I become like that right in front of you, what would I turn into afterward?”
“……”
“If you’re going to keep talking, this child will have to keep transforming. In doing so, her identity as a cat will likely become unstable.”
Identity as a cat…
I chewed on that word, feeling a hard-to-express emotion, then asked again.
“What do you mean, this child?”
“Exactly.”
Although I had no idea who was talking, it certainly did feel like a different existence from Kuro.
“Umm… Are you saying that everything that’s happened until now was not done by Kuro?”
I asked, feeling slightly confused.
“It’s both true and not true.”
I received an even more confusing reply.
“Kuro wanted it, and I gave her the power.”
“……”
“Why does Kuro want that?”
“If you die, who will open the can for me?”
“……”
That made me lose my words again.
It was frustrating, but in this conversation I was having with a cat, it was painfully understandable.
Well, a cat indeed couldn’t talk, nor would it have the skill to open a can.
“Don’t worry, it’s not like I want you to really believe me.”
When I didn’t say anything, the other party replied.
“Then, did Kuro want this too?”
“Well, kind of.”
Hmm.
I fell into thought for a moment and asked.
“So, who are you?”
“You have a very rude way of speaking. Wouldn’t you think someone capable of conversing with you would be much higher on the ladder?”
“Is there a way to determine if this is truly a dream or not?”
“It’s a valid question.”
Kuro’s tail swung sideways once.
“But I can’t just tell you my name right away.”
“Why?”
“Because I love cats. I act so cat-like that I tend to mimic them.”
“……”
“If that weren’t the case, you might not be standing here unscathed. I might have decapitated you for being so presumptuous.”
The being that looked like Kuro stretched out her front paws and let out a big yawn.
“Well, it looks like I can only meet you this way. See you next time.”
“Are you leaving?”
“Since I’ve said what I wanted to say.”
Kuro leaped down lightly and walked off with her tail held high.
As she approached the sliding door, it slid open with a swoosh.
On the other side wasn’t an entrance hall, but rather shallow stairs stacked up.
“Oh, right.”
Kuro, who had climbed about three steps, turned back and said.
“You don’t really need to worry that much, do you? There’s nothing to be hasty about. Just live comfortably like a cat. If you take it easy, things that shouldn’t be visible will become visible. If there isn’t time, you ought to enjoy things, especially when time is short. Meow.”
Kuro left that meow as a farewell and turned back.
Then, she strode elegantly up the stairs into the sky.
Swoosh, the door closed quietly behind her—
And I opened my eyes.
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