On the way back from the Purification Facility, the inside of the car was quiet, without a single sound of conversation.
Florene was sound asleep, drooling on my shoulder after playfully teasing Dwight, who was sulking and staring out the window.
In the meantime, I was lost in thought about the story I had heard today.
Off in the distance outside the window, I could see the boundary line that separated the city’s interior from the exterior.
Though invisible to the eye, a Barrier was erected there.
Despite various incidents, the Barrier remained an essential device that prevented Miasma from invading the city.
However, having learned the secret of the Barrier today, it felt like a bomb that could explode at any moment.
While it currently protected the city, the moment it detonated, it would swallow the city and all its inhabitants whole—a terrifying bomb.
Was there just nothing to do but hope that bomb wouldn’t explode?
As I was lost in such thoughts, the car, which had been speeding along, approached the boundary line marked by the Barrier.
And just as the front wheels of the car crossed the line, an instinctive rejection overwhelmed me.
A warning bell rang in my mind.
Jump out of here immediately.
Do not cross that line.
However, because I was unable to move due to Florene resting on my shoulder, the car sped past the line.
The Barrier, which rejected the intrusion of Miasma, revealed that I was not a being permitted to enter this city.
It was only then that I realized.
“Ugh…!”
Nausea rose within me.
I felt drained, as if all the strength had been stripped away from my body—powerlessness taking its toll.
Florene’s head, which leaned against my shoulder, felt unbearably heavy.
Cold sweat poured out, so profusely that I found Florene’s drool almost laughable.
I barely managed to lift my arm to cover my mouth.
If I didn’t cover it, I’d either vomit or the snacks I had just eaten at work would come back up.
It was serious.
I had heard that Demonic Beasts become incredibly weakened when forcibly crossing the Barrier, but I never expected it would be this severe.
Why hadn’t I realized this before?
As I thought about whether I had ever crossed the Barrier like this before, I recalled that this was the first time I did it while conscious.
Even when I was kidnapped by the elf named Sator or when I was abducted by a witch during a tour at the frontline, I had been unconscious when I returned to the city.
Thinking back, I remembered feeling unwell each time after such experiences, but now I understood why.
“…What’s wrong? Are you feeling sick?”
While I struggled to catch my breath and suppress the nausea, Dwight, who had been looking out the window, asked with a puzzled voice.
His words triggered a surge of anxiety.
There was no way I could pretend to be fine in my current state.
If he saw my face, which had turned serious so abruptly, it would definitely raise suspicion.
With my face having morphed from perfectly fine a moment ago to this, it was only natural that he would find it strange.
However, if he figured out that I was feeling unwell because of the Barrier, it would be the end for me.
So, I frantically racked my brain to come up with an excuse to avoid suspicion.
“…I don’t know. Maybe it’s car sickness or something, but suddenly I’m feeling a bit queasy.”
“Hm, now that you mention it, didn’t you say you were feeling sick just yesterday? Maybe you overdid it today since your body isn’t fully recovered yet.”
Was it a blessing in disguise that I had been feeling unwell until yesterday?
Dwight seemed to accept that my current condition was a result of not being fully recovered, without any suspicion.
As a sigh of relief escaped me inwardly, Dwight suddenly lowered his head and spoke to me.
“…I’m sorry. You shouldn’t have to join the tour with your health being this poor. I should apologize.”
I quickly shook my head in response.
“…No, why are you apologizing all of a sudden? I went along willingly for the tour.”
Dwight mumbled with a troubled expression.
“…I could tell you weren’t too interested in the facility. Normally, I should have sent you back since it’s a waste of your precious time. But due to my own desires, I couldn’t say that.”
“…Desire?”
“…Scarlet, I wanted to show you the coolness of magic. I thought we might get a bit closer if we shared that interest. But I was so preoccupied with my own thoughts that I never considered your condition… Can you forgive me?”
I was slightly taken aback, realizing that Dwight had such thoughts; I nodded in surprise.
Under normal circumstances, I might have felt happy and smiled at his desire to befriend me.
But now, I couldn’t summon a smile.
It wasn’t Dwight’s fault at all, yet I had to deceive him to keep my secret safe.
I just hated myself for being in such a situation.
*
The car that entered the city dropped us off in front of the Teleportation Gate.
“Scarlet, Dwight! Let’s play together with Florene again next time! See you later!”
Oblivious to everything, Florene woke up with a refreshed face, said goodbye to us, and left first, while I awkwardly exchanged goodbyes with Dwight.
“…Well then, I’ll get going. Take care of yourself.”
“…Yeah. See you next time.”
As I felt my conscience prickle under Dwight’s gaze mixed with regret and concern, I turned away.
The return home felt harder than it ever had.
Was it because I had weakened by crossing the Barrier, or was it something else?
Once I finally returned home, I suddenly missed Yoon Si-woo.
I thought sharing what had happened today with him would make me feel a bit better.
However, unfortunately, Yoon Si-woo was not in the house upon my return.
He had said he had work to attend to today, so he might come back late.
Feeling quite disappointed about this, I collapsed onto the bed.
I felt sticky with sweat, but I wasn’t in a condition for a shower or anything like that.
With great effort, I pulled the blanket over me.
The thought I had for just a moment while crossing the Barrier whispered back to me.
A being with Miasma, an unpermitted existence in this city.
I was that being.
Today, that reality hit me harder than ever.
I hated that about myself.
One of my few strengths was that I could keep positive thoughts even in tough times.
But there were days when no matter what I did, that would not be possible.
Days when my mind would be filled only with negative thoughts.
It seemed today was such a day.
I pulled the blanket that had covered my body, up over my head.
So that no one could see me.
So that no one could hear my breath.
I would have to live my life like this, keeping silent, hiding my true identity from everyone.
For a long while, no sound could even be heard beneath the blanket.
Then, a small sob echoed softly before fading into silence.
*
The worst.
That was the first thought that popped into my mind when I opened my eyes the next morning.
I felt drained.
It felt as though someone had wrung my body out like a rag, leaving no energy behind.
Yet, despite that, I forced myself to rise.
The thought that I needed to fill my body with something consumed my mind.
Entering the living room, I found a plate of omelet rice covered in wrap on the table.
Next to it, a small note read:
“I have to leave early today, so I’ll head out first. You looked tired, so I made you breakfast. -Yoon Si-woo”
With a dazed expression, I sat at the table, unwrapped the omelet rice, and took a spoonful to my mouth.
The omelet rice with just the right amount of ketchup tasted quite good.
It was delicious, but.
After chewing for a moment, I set the spoon down.
…This isn’t right.
That thought crossed my mind.
Leaving the dishes and spoon as they were, I stood up.
I took my phone out and checked the messages.
The text mentioned the location where I would help with Demonic Beast corpse disposal.
Suddenly, the word “deficiency” popped into my mind.
Deficiency, lacking.
What is lacking must be filled in.
Fill it in? With what?
I looked at the screen that was open on my phone.
The word “Demonic Beast” stood out as if highlighted.
The instinct to fill what was missing was primitive; it was an impulse.
Dazed, I moved my feet toward the place mentioned in the message.
*
As I headed toward the location described in the text, I found a crowd of people.
Dressed in outfits reminiscent of space suits, they were straining as they moved the Demonic Beast corpses.
I felt an impulse but shook my head.
I can’t be in a place with people.
It would be troublesome if discovered.
So, naturally, I slipped away from the crowded area and walked on.
Slowly, surveying my surroundings.
What I was looking for was a corpse of a Demonic Beast.
One that wouldn’t easily be seen by human eyes.
And before long, I found what I had been looking for.
In a dark alleyway tucked away, a single Demonic Beast corpse was propped up.
A powerful urge seized my body, but first, I surveyed my surroundings.
There was no one around.
It would not attract attention.
With a hesitant chuckle, I stepped into the alley.
Time had passed, and the decaying Demonic Beast corpse was visibly oozing Miasma.
Along with the overwhelming stench characteristic of decaying corpses, my impulses grew stronger at the sight.
Now that the corpse was right in front of me, there was no reason to hold back that urge.
Before I knew it, I had buried my face into the corpse.
Huh, greedily inhaling its scent.
As the black Miasma poured into me, all my body trembled.
Filling what was lacking was exhilarating.
But it was still not enough.
Not even close to being sufficient compared to what was drained away.
Then, instinctively, a method to absorb Miasma more efficiently flickered in my mind.
Flames erupted from my hand that had been gripping the Demonic Beast.
These flickering flames engulfed the entire corpse.
And the corpse, wrapped in flames, belched out thick black smoke.
I inhaled that smoke deeply.
An overwhelming feeling of satisfaction surged so intensely that my eyelids fluttered uncontrollably.
I sucked in the smoke incessantly.
But still, it was not enough.
It was still too insufficient.
I needed to quickly absorb all of this and get to another corpse—
“…Scarlet?”
At the voice that suddenly came from behind, I turned around.
A girl with orange hair, small enough that she might barely reach my shoulders, stood there, looking shocked.
Oh no.
I’ve been caught.
“W-What are you doing over there?”
The girl with a puzzled look made me feel flustered.
I couldn’t be discovered; that would be problematic.
So, what should I do?
After a moment of contemplation, an instinctive idea popped into my mind, a way to escape the awkwardness.
I looked at the girl, then cast my gaze downward.
In my hand, the fire that had just been burning the corpse was still flickering.
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