“So, you came all this way to find my stuff, didn’t you?”
I couldn’t retort anything to the chilling smile of Nameless.
It had to be a lie.
Just a foolish and obvious trick to confuse me.
Why couldn’t I find my voice?
Why couldn’t I think of a rebuttal?
My mind was tangled like an unsolvable knot right now.
“And, as you probably already know…”
As if he still had more to say, Nameless spat the blood pooling in his mouth and added,
“Your current disciple, Cheon Mu-myeong, is also the same kind of being as I am. The only difference between him and me is that he hasn’t met you.”
That was the only thing I could understand instantly out of what the guy said.
And it was a truth I really didn’t want to accept.
“Ha…”
That meant, Nameless was exactly like that guy.
Not a parallel world type of identical person, but truly the same person.
If my disciple, Cheon Mu-myeong, hadn’t met me in that hut, then he would have called me here just like that guy did.
‘Nameless, pushed me into the abyss…’
I had vaguely suspected it, but hearing it straight from that guy…
“…Was that so?”
Suddenly, everything felt hollow.
“Ha.”
All my efforts over the last 300 years were in vain.
The object of my hatred was right in front of me; what the hell was I doing, claiming I would cut the gods?
What was I even doing?
What had driven me to not reject young Nameless back in the day?
If I had done that, I wouldn’t be in this miserable state.
“Have you finally decided to stop playing lover’s games?”
At the sound of the voice, I lowered my gaze.
Nameless, wearing a seemingly refreshing smile, was staring at me with an indifferent look in his eyes.
It was genuinely nauseating.
It felt like facing pure evil itself.
“…Why?”
And it was also deeply resentful.
Why did I only learn the truth now?
“Why did you tell me the truth…? What do you gain from this…?”
I would have preferred to remain ignorant.
Being obliviously wrapped up in chasing after the futile gods with Nameless would have been happier.
“…Why.”
To my desperate question, Nameless spoke with bloodshot eyes, his voice filled with malice.
“Because you shouldn’t be happy.”
“…What?”
“I’ve worked so hard and achieved nothing. Your disciple, who merely fed off my efforts, shouldn’t be happy.”
As Nameless pleaded while blood splattered, an inexplicable disgust welled up within me.
It was a truly strange thing.
Just moments ago, looking into those eyes caused my heart to ache.
But how could a single word change the way I looked at him so drastically?
“…Right.”
In the end, that must be your true nature.
My mindset must be like a reed that would break if the wind blows.
The very reason I became aware of this feeling was pitiful.
‘…To forcefully realize it as a side effect.’
The more I thought about it, the more miserable I felt.
I brought the wooden sword up to Nameless’s chin and asked.
“Do you have any last words?”
“Please, push me to the very edge of the abyss.”
With those words, Nameless closed his eyes, and I withdrew the wooden sword, adding,
“Tsk, still ugly until the end.”
I tossed the wooden sword aside and turned my gaze to Jack, who was nearby.
“You take care of that guy’s mind.”
“Cheonma…”
I couldn’t do it.
Just the thought of injuring Nameless with my own hands made my chest tight.
And with every tightening of my chest, I felt sick-looking at myself still unable to think straight.
“What are you doing? Hurry up and obey my words.”
At my command, Jack seemed hesitant but soon nodded.
“…Understood.”
With heavy steps, Jack stood before Nameless.
“Excuse me for a moment.”
Suddenly, the wooden sword, lying next to me, caught my eye.
It had cracks from years of use, but thanks to someone taking care of it, it was sharpened for that day.
If it were up to me, I would have loved to break that wooden sword and bury it in the ground, but I couldn’t do that.
Why?
I didn’t even know myself.
Right now, I didn’t want to think at all.
No, it’s because I, a fool, still held onto hope even in this situation.
“Nameless…”
Please tell me the words of that dead man are lies.
*
“I have to tell the Master…”
Nameless found it hard to understand everything laid out before him.
After all, he couldn’t know.
He had never touched transcendence, and though he may have been in despair like that man, there was still the salvation called Cheon Ha-rang.
Therefore, it was almost impossible to fully understand that man’s feelings.
“…It can’t be.”
But he had to know.
Only then could he convey his apology.
The Master fell into the abyss because of that man, no, because of his past.
He was trapped in hell.
Therefore, to somehow seek forgiveness.
No, even if he couldn’t seek forgiveness, at least to tell the Master the truth, to convey an apology, he needed to know.
And for Nameless, this situation was fortunate.
Inside the mind, the flow of time was different.
This place kindly provided enough time for Nameless to think alone.
So, he sat cross-legged and pondered.
“…What if?”
What if he had lived the same life as that man?
Would he also have struggled to meet his Master like that man did?
It was hard to give a definite answer.
Currently, Nameless would be willing to sacrifice himself for his Master, but couldn’t he also be in despair like that?
Perhaps he could.
“…No, he would.”
He had no fear at birth, and he felt compelled to do whatever he wanted.
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Because of that, hadn’t he even pushed his own parents to their deaths?
“Phew.”
Suddenly, thinking of him made him smile.
The more he pondered, the more he moved toward a single answer.
‘At this rate, I shouldn’t have been born.’
Wasn’t he the starting point of all problems? No, he was the one leading everyone into unhappiness.
The people around him could not become happy.
Himself was evidence.
His parents lost their lives because of him, and his Master fell into the abyss because of him.
Recalling that truth…
“…Huh.”
Nameless’s heart felt like it was being torn apart.
Yet, he felt the overwhelming powerlessness of being unable to do anything.
The gleam in Nameless’s eyes slowly faded, replaced only by trembling pupils.
“Ugh…”
*
How long had it been?
In the midst of his solitary anguish, a sudden light began to envelop Nameless.
“Ah.”
In that, Nameless instinctively knew.
“It’s time.”
Soon, he began to feel excruciating pain in his body as his Master appeared before him.
And also the wooden sword, cast aside in the corner.
“…”
Nameless lowered his gaze to the complex and suffocating feelings filling his heart.
He didn’t have the courage to look his Master directly in the face.
He didn’t even deserve to.
…But this wouldn’t do.
“Master—”
Thinking that, Nameless called out to his Master, but—
“Nameless.”
The words of his Master cut him off, and they were now looking at him with a cold gaze he’d never seen before.
“…Yes.”
It felt like a needle was piercing his heart, but Nameless nodded silently.
After all, it was his Master who would be hurting more.
His Master called for him.
What Nameless could do was merely answer his Master’s question.
The level voice penetrated his ears.
“Did you see everything until now?”
Even though winter hadn’t begun, a cold chill seeped into his heart.
“…Yes.”
“Then, I have something to ask.”
Thud. His heart sank.
Nameless furrowed his brow, small droplets of blood falling from his eyes like washing away sorrow.
“Is everything that bug said true?”
A multifaceted question with a lot hidden inside.
But the only answer he could give was one.
“Yes…”
“…Ha.”
Soon, his Master’s heavy breath could be heard.
Nameless couldn’t lift his head under that weight.
He had plenty of things to say too.
But seeing his Master’s cold gaze, a frigid winter came sweeping through his mind, covering everything in white.
“…Are you sure?”
“Yes… I saw it in his mind…”
“Is that so…”
There was no further question.
Perhaps, even while hating himself, he couldn’t doubt those words.
Probably, even if he had lied, his Master would have believed him.
After all, that’s the kind of person his Master was.
Even if he said he hated him, he had never shown any truly hateful expression.
His Master was that kind of person.
“…I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.”
In contrast, he felt something.
Right now, at this moment.
Wasn’t he regretting telling the truth?
“…It’s alright. I want to be alone for a while.”
“Master…”
“I’ll be gone for a time, so don’t look for me.”
All this time, he had believed his nature was without fear, thinking that he must do everything he wanted to do.
In reality, he was more of a coward than his Master.
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