There’s a term called “defeat climax.”
It’s a bizarre internet slang that gauges just how sick modern society has become; you could say it’s a deep word from an abyss.
If we were to classify it on the Kardashev scale of the universe, it would be about level 3.
Anyway, “defeat climax” suggests that people with eccentric tastes find immense pleasure in defeat and ruin, reaching a climax in the process.
But me, with my exceedingly healthy mindset, was entirely the opposite—I was experiencing a victory climax!
“Woaaaaah! Kraaaah! We won! We won!!!”
Victory, sheer victory!
I bellowed in praise of our triumph, the exhilaration of winning coursing through my brain and making all my limbs tremble. This was not just a win.
I had achieved my first real victory in battle!
We triumphed against more than twenty Goblin warriors!
The combative genes lying dormant in the human instinct were yelling at me to keep winning, to seize more victories!
Today’s victory would bring me immense wealth!
“I did it! We did it! Kraaah! We defeated those Goblins!”
After some time of roaring, I finally managed to calm down and looked around.
Gu Jumang was lying down, catching his breath, while Mr. Song and Jaemi Son were sitting nearby, sipping water.
It seemed I was the only one still making a ruckus.
So, I shouted.
“Everyone! Did you see that! My technique worked brilliantly and cleaved the Goblin warrior in half! I feel like I’ve gained some kind of enlightenment from it!”
My technique had worked flawlessly. In martial arts, there’s always something about ‘enlightenment,’ and I felt I had truly grasped that this time.
Next time, I could perfectly showcase that technique again. Why? Because I’ve done it once. I succeeded with a clean hit! That enlightenment remains in my hands!
“Woaaaaah!”
“Ugh… this guy’s even crazier than I imagined. Total cringe.”
“Can… can you please be quiet… it’s like my ears are gonna burst…”
“Ha ha ha! What’s wrong with enjoying the joy of victory to the fullest?”
Alright, let’s start wrapping things up.
I rubbed my forearm where that stone axe had hit earlier. It didn’t hurt too much… but when I rolled up my sleeve, a big bruise was evident.
“Ugh.”
Getting hurt. Well, with my health, a bruise like this shouldn’t be a problem. Just need to apply some medicine and ensure I eat and sleep well.
“Mr. Song! What should we do now?”
“We need to collect the noses of the Goblins.”
“Oh, so submitting those will complete the quest. But what about Oh Gisoo…?”
He was nowhere to be found after running off earlier.
“Oh Gisoo! That damn guy! He’s out! Let’s divide the reward among ourselves!”
That’s what Gu Jumang thought right!
Honestly, considering how he kept crowing earlier and fell during the fight, I couldn’t view him positively, but still, we fought to the end as comrades and achieved victory.
So, such trivial issues can just slip away.
Ah, but if Gu Jumang hadn’t made a sound earlier, we could have reduced their numbers by half… I’ll take this as a lesson learned.
“Gu Jumang! You’re speaking very wisely! Obviously, that coward Oh Gisoo who fled during the battle doesn’t deserve a share! Jaemi Son and Mr. Song agree, right?!”
“I agree.”
“Not quite.”
Perfect.
Well, whether Oh Gisoo dies running away or not doesn’t matter. What’s important is that we’ve gained more silver.
“Then let’s get to chopping off those Goblin noses.”
As I pulled out my dagger, everyone around started grabbing their axes and daggers.
Then.
I squatted down before the lifeless Goblin.
“…”
It was mercilessly slain. Even a failed okonomiyaki would look better than this. Still, this bastard fell to my blade. I sliced through from shoulder to ribs with a fresh cut.
“This is my martial art skill.”
He would probably consider it an honor to die by my hands, a supreme master. While silently erecting a monument for him in my heart, I severed his nose with my dagger.
The feel was unsettling… but then.
“Oh, everyone. I have a question. Can we eat this Goblin meat?”
“What…?”
“What?”
“Nothing, I just want to save on food expenses. If we can harvest their meat, it could be good for muscle. Mr. Song, what do you think?”
“…There’s no poison.”
“Whoa!”
Alright, let’s attempt dismembering!
—Spppt.
I immediately attempted skinning it. I’ve done it several times with the Soseongui’s corpse, so I have some skills.
Of course, doing it to a Goblin for the first time was never going to go smoothly.
“Dammit.”
Blood sprayed, and the skin tore—it was beyond disgusting. But gaining this experience would pay off later. I forcibly skinned the Goblin’s hide like a sadistic killer dealing with its prey’s carcass.
—Spppt.
“Eww.”
What the heck am I doing?
“You crazy bastard… if you’re gonna throw up, just stop.”
“Jaemi Son. This will all be experience. If I can peel Goblin hide cleanly later, I can sell the hide and also get the meat.”
“I really… don’t want to eat it.”
“Heh heh heh, come on, you try it too.”
Anyway, I forced my way through skinning the upper and lower body of the Goblin, but it was incredibly difficult. Still, I thought I could somehow get that Goblin meat… oh hell.
This is just disgusting!
What’s with the stench!
“Ah, I can’t eat that!”
I immediately stood up.
“I warned you, didn’t I?”
Jaemi Son scolded me, but it’s because my experience points were lacking. Thinking like that, I noticed Mr. Song.
“Hmm?”
Mr. Song was heading into the Goblins’ den.
“Mr. Song! Are you allowed in there?!”
“I’m gathering trophies.”
“Oh!”
It hit me!
Goblins are relatively intelligent and have enough societal structure to form a tribe. It’s only natural there’d be valuable items in their lair.
“Right! Let’s search together! Mr. Song! Jaemi Son! Gu Jumang, come too!”
“I’ll follow.”
“Alright, let’s go!”
We then entered the dark cave together.
—Kiyyeek.
—Kkiieek.
Once inside, we heard strange noises.
“Mr. Song?”
“Baby Goblins.”
“Babies?”
Well, of course, in a cave there would be babies.
“This way.”
As I approached the source of the sound, I could dimly see baby Goblins sprawled out. It was quite dark inside the den.
“Eat this if you want. It’s somewhat better.”
“Oh.”
Baby Goblin meat?
Not the worst thing, but cooking here sounds troublesome.
“It’s tempting, but gathering the loot seems more important now.”
“Yeah…”
—Crack!
Mr. Song, without any mercy, crushed a baby Goblin’s head beneath his foot. In that moment, a dark gleam seemed to flow from his eyes.
—Crack!
—Crack!
This merciless sight and honed killing intent. His skills from earlier, easily cutting down Goblins.
Mr. Song was undoubtedly an unmatched expert in Goblin hunting. Just watching his brutal butchery made my heart race with anxiety.
Could it be the grudge he mentioned was somehow related to Goblins?
—Crack!
—Crack!
As Mr. Song laughed while stepping on a baby Goblin, his expression was faint but intense.
“Geunhyeop… there’s a path over there.”
“Okay. Jaemi Son, let’s go together.”
“Oh, what?”
Feeling a bit chilled, I decided to move along with Jaemi Son, the relative sane one. As for Gu Jumang, he could handle himself.
In this way, we thoroughly searched the Goblin cave, being cautious due to possible ambush.
With diligent searching, we managed to find some rewards.
We gathered various tools made of iron, wood, and stone. There were also plenty of stone spears and stone axes outside.
“Let’s bring everything back.”
“Heh heh heh, this is great. Mr. Song, can we sell these stone spears or axes?”
“We can sell them cheaply at a general store.”
Hearing about the market price, it seemed we could sell each for about 5 coins. So, that means a total of around 150 coins in profit? If we split it four ways, each of us would get around 30 to 40 coins.
And if we divide the two silver pieces among four…!
That’s a whopping profit of 530 coins!
In just one day!
“Nvidia, what’s that! You low-life scum!”
From today onwards, I’ve become one with the Goblins, and any attack against them is an attack against me.
What can I do with 530 coins, I swear?!
I could buy anything I want!
“It’s like my heart’s been burned, like tears have stained me!”
The joy made me break into a work song.
After a splendid farming session, I stepped outside the cave and started organizing everything.
—Wrap!
I tied up the miscellaneous goods as well as the severed noses. It was a shame to leave behind so many Goblin hides and meat, but the hides were damaged, and the meat reeked too much, so I had to pass.
Still, I plan to try my skinning skills every chance I get. As my proficiency increases, my side incomes should improve as well! Oh, and I have a bag, so maybe I’ll pick up some cooking tools to carry around?
Then next time we have meat, we could cook it on the spot. Sure, the Goblin meat might have a slight stench, but I’m an experienced eater who has haphazardly downed Great Monster stew before.
There’s no reason we can’t eat Goblins.
“Ah, all done! Let’s go!”
Gu Jumang shouted.
“Heh heh heh! Everyone worked hard! You all performed excellently!”
“Yeah… you as well.”
I felt like I could really get along with Jaemi Son.
“…”
Mr. Song silently nodded.
Anyway, the feast is over.
Let’s head back with all we’ve gathered.
“Phew.”
Fighting scrawny little Soseongui demons was merely a joke. This is what real combat is—life-and-death brawls.
Today’s experience will become my invaluable experience points. I’ll be able to do even better next time.
Whatever happens, my first practical quest was wrapped up smoothly and pleasantly.
“Hey, everyone!”
Just before Oh Gisoo, who bolted earlier, showed up again.
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