It was always the case, but sometimes I would get into a very gloomy state.
I think that was one of those times when I was with Adrian.
It was something I probably shouldn’t have said, but maybe I just went with the flow.
Sometimes, I felt the urge to spill all about my reincarnation to someone, but perhaps those times overlapped… and my heart weakened.
After a night’s sleep, all those gloomy emotions disappeared.
I knew well that being trapped in such feelings wasn’t good, and if I thought about it…
It was definitely due to Adrian.
Miragen, Adele, and Adrian. The women in this life who I formed connections with all provided me with a sense of mental stability.
The problem was that all three of them were women.
If someone saw, they might misunderstand the relationship between me and them.
…Well, it’s not like I have no feelings at all, but still.
I gave my cheek a light slap and got out of bed.
Seeing these kind of random thoughts pop up, I felt my body was quite alright.
Just yesterday, I felt like I might die several times, and if Adrian hadn’t hugged me, I wouldn’t have been able to endure it.
If I had to pick the best choice in this life, it would definitely be meeting Adrian.
Coming to the South was also a factor. I wouldn’t have come here so easily without Adrian.
As I thought about it, I felt oddly pulled towards her, but anyway, it meant she was no longer an ordinary presence for me.
Thump, thump.
Hearing footsteps beyond the door, I chuckled softly and began boiling water for tea for the guest who would likely arrive soon.
Today, I felt quite refreshed. After shaking off one bout of gloom, I usually felt like this.
I preferred to savor this feeling right now.
After this sun sets, I would probably face some not-so-great sights.
“Robert, are you there?”
Knock, knock.
Gripping the doorknob at the slightly frantic voice knocking on the door, Adrian burst through with a loud sound.
It was clear what her intention was by coming to see me, so I just held the teacup and stared silently at her.
What should I say first? After thinking for a moment, I opened my mouth.
“Good morning?”
“…It’s bold of you to say that after what happened yesterday. Do you know how worried I was? ‘Don’t hate me if I disappear’—don’t even joke about that.”
“Got it. By the way, you seem quite angry.”
“I’m not angry. I’m just… just a little worried.”
The feelings I sensed when I looked at Adele were completely different.
If I were to say this was cute, that would be a fitting expression indeed.
Unintentionally reaching out to stroke her head, I then suddenly stopped and handed her the teacup instead.
Receiving the teacup, Adrian let out a deep sigh.
She seemed to have had a lot on her mind last night.
I felt bad that it was because of me, but in truth, I had said it without much thought.
“Still, you look happy today?”
“Can’t complain. I’ve let go of all my bad feelings, thanks to Adrian.”
“Well, I’m glad to hear that.”
The gloom that occasionally settled within me didn’t come with a warning before it showed up.
It wasn’t as if they told me when they would come and then showed up.
They just appeared unannounced, simply drifting into my residual thoughts.
Once I shake this off, I’m usually fine for a while.
The reason it was tough this time was probably because I saw Teresa.
Killing Teresa might make things a bit harder, but that’s a matter for later.
For now, I wanted to enjoy a moment of leisure.
Right now, as we sit across from each other at this table, I could say this is the happiest time for me.
#
“Looks like I’ve got a bit of time to spare today.”
Clang—
Berod lightly flicked my sword away. I agree with his comment about having leisure.
In truth, it had been mentally exhausting over the past few days, and showcasing my skills wasn’t easy.
Now that mental weight has dissipated; I might be in a good state to extract my maximum potential.
Getting back to the level I’d once stepped on isn’t that difficult.
Since it’s a path I’ve already traveled, I didn’t just arbitrarily set a timeframe of two years to fully recover my strength.
At this rate, I should soon be at a usable level.
Of course, a usable level means I could hold my own against Berod.
“Just because you have leisure doesn’t mean you can win.”
“You’ve got too much ambition. Do you realize there’s no Paladin who can stand against me?”
“I do. However, the goal I’m envisioning is a bit higher.”
“Sounds like you want to be a Sword Master.”
A Sword Master? That wasn’t a name that piqued my interest. Why would I be interested in what I’ve already attained?
I was aiming for something above that, beyond what’s called the Sword Master.
What should I even call that?
It might not be limited to just swords, considering the weapon I’m currently wielding is a spear.
Berod clicked his tongue briefly at my appearance wielding a spear instead of a sword.
Of course, a spear is always a tricky weapon in close combat.
It’s much longer and capable of cutting and stabbing like a sword.
Some of the Paladins shot me weary glances as I handled the spear as adeptly as if I were with a sword.
“Is it talent?”
“It’s effort.”
“That’s what geniuses say.”
I’m curious what they’d say if they knew I wasted a hundred years reaching this level.
To them, I must seem like the young master who hasn’t even built a callus on his hand.
To them, I probably look like someone who does everything well purely out of talent. This perspective isn’t bad.
In the future, whatever actions I take, people might say things like, “If it’s Robert, he can do it.”
But in the end, as time passes, I’m the one getting exhausted,
barely dodging the heavy hammer that comes crashing down, I raised my hand high.
Going head-to-head with Berod was still a stretch.
However, raising my condition to this level was decent progress.
I could probably take down about three Temujins without much trouble now.
This felt like quite an encouraging achievement, so I gently stroked the new sword I had acquired and slowly regulated my breath.
With the need to move early this morning, there was no need to push myself further in this state.
Just as I was resting for a brief moment, I suddenly heard Berod’s voice by my ear.
“Is the Saintess alone?”
“She must be with the priests. She usually was when I was with the Paladin.”
“…She’s so attached normally, but she’s pretending not to care now.”
Was she actually worried about that? A slight chuckle escaped, making Berod frown.
He already knew he was being overly concerned about Adrian.
It had gone a bit too far; he might as well think of Adrian as his own daughter.
He was probably worried about how close Adrian and I were getting.
“No need to worry too much. We’re just friends, right?”
“I don’t know what you mean, but the Saintess isn’t someone with low standards.”
“It seems you think poorly of me.”
Objectively speaking, there aren’t many people who could match my caliber.
It’s true that I’ve achieved quite a lot at a young age, thanks to countless reincarnations.
I have the support of the Grand Duke, the backing of the Princess, and I’m even the close friend of the Saintess and the rival of Paladin Berod.
And yet, here I am at just twenty-one.
If I were from an average noble family, everyone would probably be eyeing me for marriage, but I’m Taylor, and that’s the problem.
I’m the Young Master who got a bad reputation as Taylor,
So even if my rumors improve later, it won’t make a huge difference.
“I don’t think poorly; I just think you should be careful.”
“In what way?”
“The Saintess isn’t someone who will take in all your emotions.”
I nodded at that. I was aware of it.
I knew it wasn’t good to unload my feelings onto someone else; that was already clear to me.
I don’t know how he figured it out, but he could probably tell just by looking at Adrian’s expression.
I said something unnecessary, and Adrian took it to heart.
So, it wasn’t surprising he would say it; he had seen her for the longest time.
Nodding quietly, I opened my mouth.
“I’m reflecting on that.”
“I don’t like that you’re saying unnecessary things either. You know how much the Saintess has worried, right?”
“She came to visit me first thing this morning. I think I calmed her down well.”
“…This morning?”
I couldn’t help but chuckle at the wide-eyed surprise on his face.
Didn’t he know that? I wondered if I shouldn’t have brought it up.
At least the name Adrian was like touching a nerve for Berod.
Just as I carefully rose from my seat, a rough hand grasped my shoulder.
“Do you think I would feel good about you getting too close?”
“Probably not. Quite vehemently, I’d say.”
“I’m curious about your thoughts. Do you really believe you can remain just friends with the Saintess, without any feelings?”
That was a reasonable concern.
There had been quite a few men who had approached the Saintess, and Berod, who had cut them off beforehand, would naturally be worried about this.
However, I wasn’t living without thinking about this relationship either.
I was equally concerned about my dynamic with Adrian evolving beyond just friendship.
With a small smile, I added,
I added with a small grin.
“You don’t need to worry about that.”
If there’s even a possibility of that kind of relationship developing, I’d rather avoid it myself.
Berod, who had been staring at me quietly for a moment, swallowed hard and let go of my hand.
With a light shrug of his tense shoulders, he started walking again.
Step by step, Berod didn’t hold onto me anymore.
He simply stared at me as I drifted away, and without saying a word, he too disappeared.
Before I knew it, the sky had darkened, and the moon hung above.
A bluish shadow enveloped the surroundings, and in the slowly approaching calm, my breath started to find its stability.
In my hand was a sword, and what I was looking at was darkness.
The ticking sound from the invisible clock slowly filled my ears.
My steps didn’t stop; I kept moving forward.
#
“Are you really planning to go?”
“I already said it. I’m going to the South.”
At Adele’s words, Lothos furrowed his brow.
I understood that there was nothing to do. And knowing Robert was in the South, I understood the urgency to go.
But what if we set off so suddenly?
I had already arranged my schedule, but if a Grand Duke were to leave overnight, chaos would inevitably ensue.
Even though I sent a somewhat earnest gaze, nothing changed.
The moment Adele read the letter from Robert, she had decided that the trip to the South was a done deal.
Gripping the wolf’s reins tightly, Adele glanced at the letter peeking out from her embrace.
It was a letter from Robert. It complicated her thoughts so much that she was determined to confront him directly. What on earth was he thinking when he wrote that?
Thanks to so many thoughts surging up, her already dizzy heart became even more tangled.
“Can’t you stay here just for my face?”
“What’s so special about your face? I feel nothing.”
“When you see Duke Taylor, your heart must race. Yes, I get it.”
However, that sarcasm didn’t last long.
Swallowing hard at the cold gaze directed at him, Lothos stared straight ahead with a stiff posture, unlike before.
To look at me with such an expression meant that he had already made up his mind.
It’s over. It’s up to me to roll with this, and I have to endure the night.
As I exhaled heavily while looking at Lothos, Adele turned her back and spoke.
“Well then, we should probably get going. It’ll take about three days to the South.”
“Try to avoid crowded areas. The people in the Center fear wolves.”
“Do I look like a fool? I know better than you.”
The cold northern wind chilled my cheeks. The feeling I experienced from that wind was a slight thrill.
Awakened memories from the letter I read. If this were true…
I had so many questions for Robert. I didn’t think I’d ask everything.
What came to mind was just a single memory.
With a harsh howl of a wolf, Adele began to run forward.
Towards the South, specifically, where Robert would be.
A soft smile appeared at the corners of Adele’s mouth as she ran.
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