Chapter 500: Who Are You Calling an Idiot?
Back at home.
After some sweet moments with Little Ying, I was eventually kicked out of the room.
I spent a few days hopping between the rooms of my several wives, all while tackling a mountain of dizzying official business.
A few days later.
Demon Cultivation Square.
“Hey…”
In the square, Hua Jianglian sat on the ground in a green dress, propping her head up as she gazed at a coffin in the center.
“Can it really bring the dead back to life…”
“It sounds so impressive!”
“Even though it sounds great,” Young Master Sang mumbled as he struggled to arrange a formation, “it’s actually troublesome and relies on luck.”
“Some unlucky folks die just before they can be resurrected, and their souls go straight back into the cycle of reincarnation, leaving no chance for rescue.”
Hua Jianglian pouted and silently lowered her head.
Meanwhile, Xu Yourong, who was busy setting up the formation alongside Young Master Sang, wiped his sweat and said, “Hey, Sang bro.”
“If that old man Li Shanyan really comes back to life…”
“Will he be mad at us? You know… disturbing his eternal sleep and all.”
“Mad? I’m the one who’s mad!” Young Master Sang snapped. “That old geezer kicked the bucket without even a word, dumped all his tasks on me, and left not a single penny of inheritance!”
“When he gets resurrected, I’m going to squeeze him dry of every last bit of value left in him, then toss his bones in the wilderness!”
Xu Yourong shrank back at Sang’s fierce expression.
Whether it was Sang or Li Shanyan, he couldn’t handle either.
And strictly speaking, both of them had left him with some serious psychological scars.
Thinking it over, Xu Yourong decided to remain silent and keep working.
Under their efforts, soon the entire Demon Cultivation Square was enveloped in a massive formation.
The intention of this formation was mainly for precaution.
After all, who knew what kind of ruckus resurrecting a Grandmaster would cause? Better to be safe than sorry.
“Phew… We’re done.”
After finishing the setup, Young Master Sang wiped his sweat and walked up to the coffin.
Hua Jianglian and Xu Yourong had already retreated outside the formation, watching from afar.
“Next…”
Young Master Sang stared at the body in the coffin, a sinister smile creeping onto his face.
“Old geezer.”
“Are you ready to come back from the underworld and be totally drained of your value?”
Then, he pulled out a heavy, ancient-looking copper bell from his hands.
Closing his eyes and chanting, he gently shook it.
——
——
Under the bright stars and moon, in a cool pavilioned grove.
A stone table, a pot of tea, a chessboard.
A handsome young man pondered over the chessboard, deep in thought.
Across from him sat an old man with a kind, aged face, stroking his beard and chuckling, occasionally interrupting the young man’s concentration.
“…You can’t make that move; you’d be cutting off the escape routes for two major dragons!”
“Hey, hey, hey, if you go this way, I won’t let you take it back later!”
“Exactly! You should definitely go here; it’s obvious if you think about it for just a moment!”
“…National Master, what turned you into this kind of noisy chatterbox?” Huo Jian said helplessly, “Is it because of my descendants?”
“Ha ha! The emperor’s descendants wouldn’t give an old man such a headache!”
Li Shanyan chuckled, stroking his beard. “It’s just that before I kicked the bucket, I ran into a real livewire, way worse than the emperor’s descendants!”
Huo Jian was intrigued. “Who’s got you so worked up? What kind of holy person can do that?”
“A shameless, ruthless, and wicked Demon Cultivator.”
Li Shanyan stated with conviction.
Huo Jian: “?”
“This guy is cruel. At the age of over nine hundred, I was ambushed by him and his beautiful accomplice, showing no respect for the elderly or children! Absolutely detestable.”
As soon as he mentioned this ‘wicked Demon Cultivator,’ Li Shanyan seemed to have a barrage of grievances to air.
“His schemes were treacherous. Seeing the Holy Kingdom’s wealth, he spread an electronic opiate called the Communication Device, trying to siphon off the people’s money for himself.”
“He was so ambitious that he infiltrated my National Master’s estate under a new identity, even roping in a little prince and deceiving the current Holy Emperor while I couldn’t get away, eventually climbing to the position of National Master.”
“He brazenly saw the beautiful Empress, poured on the flattery, and charmed her until affairs went to chaos, leaving the common people in distress!”
Li Shanyan then sighed, “What a disaster for the country.”
Huo Jian: “…Is this person named Daji?”
“Well, calling him a male version of Daji wouldn’t be wrong.”
“Since this person is so evil, didn’t you take action against him, National Master?” Huo Jian wondered, “Or has he become so powerful that even you can’t handle him?”
“Not at all.”
Li Shanyan smiled gently and shook his head, a glint of nostalgia in his old eyes:
“Although he has done despicable acts, thankfully, he has a good heart.”
“He is diligent and capable, and what’s more precious is that he has a pure heart, taking on the world’s big issues as his responsibility.”
“With him as the backbone of the Holy Kingdom, I can work less sincerely and take it easy.”
“…So it’s still about slacking off.” Huo Jian felt both amused and exasperated.
“Of course.”
Li Shanyan said unabashedly, “Before I died, the world was a total mess.”
“The Empress of the Holy Kingdom is a fool, treasures in various places igniting constant strife, and outside forces eyeing us with malicious intent.”
“If I didn’t run away, cleaning up that mess would have been my job.”
“Now that someone’s here to take the heat for me, when else could I escape?”
He took a satisfied sip of tea: “Being here now, sipping tea, playing chess, and enjoying the sights of all living things in the cycle of life—what could be better?”
Huo Jian: “Uh, about that.”
“I’ve worked hard my whole life; can’t I enjoy myself a little? I’ve been pulling double shifts for nearly a thousand years. Who can take that?”
“No, I meant….”
“If I had to say, that kid Sang is an idiot. He never thinks why, at my age, I’ve never married or had kids.”
“But…”
“Marriage and children mean responsibilities, burdens, and vulnerabilities. If anything happens in the world, he’d have to bust his behind to fix it.”
“…”
“It’s just him, a foolish young man, falling for every pretty face, tying himself up in those consequences, in the end only to inherit the mess of saving the world.”
Li Shanyan proudly declared, “I have the foresight. Women are the root of all trouble; as long as I stay clear of them, I can live a good life.”
“Look at how happy I am now, isn’t that right, Your Majesty?”
Huo Jian silently stared at him.
Then he pointed behind him.
Li Shanyan paused, then turned in shock.
What he saw was a grinning face that would haunt his nightmares.
“…Old man.”
“Who are you calling an idiot?”
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