“I’m sorry… I feel like I’ve caused you some weird misunderstandings…”
Haryeong has a sulky face. She’s been apologizing a storm. Maybe it’s because she feels sorry for me, but she hasn’t even touched the tteokbokki in front of her.
Thanks to that, the innocent tteokbokki is getting cold. At this rate, the rice cakes in the tteokbokki will get all soggy.
I picked up a piece of tteokbokki to show that I was okay. The steaming, bright red tteokbokki looked like it had absorbed all the seasoning perfectly.
“Mm, it’s delicious. Haryeong, you should eat quickly too.”
“Uuuu… I’m so sorry. Really.”
Haryeong hesitated for a moment but then swallowed hard and started to eat the tteokbokki.
The truth is, it wasn’t such a big mistake. If I had to classify it, it was a broadcasting accident, but come on, can anyone be perfect in every way?
People make mistakes. Especially since Haryeong had just been dealing with a stalker not too long ago.
After going through such a tough time, she might have relaxed her guard a bit when I came over to stay with her. And in that moment, accidents like this can happen.
And to be honest… this is nothing to call a broadcasting accident. The internet broadcasting world is like a wilderness where anything can happen, and all sorts of incidents have occurred.
There are even outrageous incidents that make you question if they are real. Just recently, one was so shocking it made the 9 o’clock news.
I wasn’t secretly dating a boyfriend like the viewers suspected, nor was I juggling between multiple guys, so there was really nothing to worry about.
When you’re broadcasting, sounds from home can leak in and such. If I say it’s not me, what can the viewers do? If they don’t believe the facts, they’re just hurting themselves.
I dipped a crispy fried squid in the tteokbokki sauce and said, “It can happen, it can happen. I might have developed an image of dating men behind the scenes while running a broth business, but it’s fine.”
“Cough, cough! I’m so sorry! It’s my fault!”
“I’m sorry, it was just a joke. Eat slowly so you don’t choke.”
If it were earlier, she would have caught on that it was a joke right away, but it seemed like Haryeong’s condition had really declined.
She looked up at me like a kid who’s been scolded, chewing on the tteokbokki.
I finished my meal while looking at her with sympathetic eyes.
*
Living with someone is definitely not a light matter. Sharing a living space with another person can lead to all sorts of situations.
Sharing a living space with someone can lead to all sorts of incidents. Today was no exception. Somehow, things took a turn for the worse.
“Ah, I wasn’t trying to spy! I just wanted to ask how we were having breakfast. Um… yeah…”
The situation was simple. Haryeong was changing clothes in her room, and I barged in without knocking, accidentally getting an eyeful of her bare back.
Well, “bare” is a stretch since all I really saw was her back, and thankfully, she still had her underwear on.
“….”
But the atmosphere was as tense as a rubber band about to snap. Just silence in the room. It was a bit extreme for a reaction over merely seeing a little back. Haryeong didn’t want to show her back to anyone, especially not me.
On her back were small flowers colored in pink, not too large, but definitely noticeable.
Yes, it was a tattoo. It turned out Haryeong had a tattoo, a secret no one—including the viewers—knew about.
I was at a loss for words, just rolling my eyes around awkwardly. Haryeong, lost for a moment, finally managed to say something.
“I-I was a model student in school! I’ve never skipped evening study sessions, really! I’m not some delinquent!”
She flailed her arms around, trying to explain herself. It seemed she was worried I’d misunderstand after seeing the tattoo.
Honestly, I had to admit, Haryeong had a bit of a wild vibe. You know, that “older sister who’s a little too much fun” kind of impression.
At first, I remember thinking she might be a scary person—but that perception had shifted drastically over time.
Despite her appearance, Haryeong was surprisingly delicate, unable to say harsh things and the type to suffer in silence. This goes to show that you can’t judge a book by its cover.
“Well, it’s not like it’s an Irezumi or anything, and these days, lots of people have tattoos.”
“Actually, there’s a backstory to this…”
In a nutshell, she had a burn scar on her back from an accident when she was young, which always bothered her. So, as soon as she turned an adult, she covered it with a tattoo.
“But people don’t care about that. They just see this and think I’m some rough-around-the-edges person, like a delinquent…”
She had quite the ordeal when a classmate accidentally saw her tattoo in college and spread rumors about her, making her life pretty miserable.
It was then that she fell into the world of gaming, which she’d never touched before. She took a leave of absence, living like a semi-recluse while diving into the Abyss, ranking up, and eventually starting her broadcast.
“People can be so cruel.”
“Right? That was when I first realized how many bad people there are in the world.”
“I’ve had a similar experience—”
“I had a similar experience.”
It was a time when Mother had passed away and I was struggling with living costs.
While hopping from one part-time job to another to make ends meet, I ended up injuring my right hand while doing some rough work.
As a result, my hand trembled for a month like I had a case of shaky hands.
“One day, I went to a restaurant and the older folks at the table across from me said, ‘What kind of young guy drinks so much that his hands are shaking like that? Looks like he’s already an alcoholic.’ They were tsk-tsking.”
“Ah…”
“It was understandable to misinterpret. I was really struggling back then and had a shot of soju. But still, that doesn’t change the fact that it felt bad.”
I flipped the table right then and there—
Speaking of that moment brings back memories. When I think about it now, those were truly tough times. It’s almost overwhelming how well things have turned out now.
As I reminisced for a moment, Haryeong tightly grabbed my hand.
“You’ve had it tough just like me, or even tougher…”
“Uh? No, it wasn’t that tough.”
“Let’s cheer up together. No matter how much the world torments us, let’s not give up until the end—”
Feeling a surge of emotions, Haryeong clung to me, sounding a bit choked up. It seems like some switch had flipped again. She has this frosty look but is surprisingly sentimental.
So, I spent time sharing past stories and life tales with Haryeong.
*
Haryeong, who had found her everyday life impossible due to a stalker.
After going through the turmoil of comparison with Kayak, the rat incident, and a subsequent existential crisis about broadcasting, she had been having a pretty happy life lately. At least, that’s how she felt.
“I just finished the broadcast.”
“Great job! I’m taking a break today.”
“Wait, can you take a break just like that?”
Every day, after finishing her broadcasts, Kayak would say she did well.
“What should we eat today?”
“Should we make kimchi stew, or order in?”
“Hmm… I don’t feel like cooking, so let’s order in?”
Finally, Haryeong could order takeout she always hesitated on due to the large portions, now that someone was there to share it with.
“The weather’s nice. Shall we go for a walk?”
“A walk… can we go?”
“Of course! I’ll secretly follow you from behind, so don’t worry. That’s why I’m here with you.”
Thanks to that, she could finally step outside without the fear that the stalker had instilled. Although she couldn’t walk alongside Kayak chatting, she enjoyed a pleasant time walking after a long while.
In this way, Kayak was helping Haryeong regain her daily life. Just as she boldly asserted, having her by her side meant there was nothing to worry about.
No longer did she have to fear the unfamiliar gazes coming from outside.
With the sudden sound of knocking, she didn’t have to tremble at malicious emails anymore. The lonely bed, which had grown lonely over time, was no longer so.
“I’ll turn off the light.”
“Yes.”
Even in the pitch-black darkness, if she listened closely, she could hear the faintest sound of breathing.
It was Kayak’s breath.
In the pitch-black night where nothing was visible, Haryeong was no longer afraid.
‘Would it feel like this if I had an older sister or a younger sibling?’
Haryeong had grown up as an only child. Though her environment was more than sufficient, the one flaw was that she had no siblings. She remembered being envious of friends who argued with their brothers and sisters.
She thought being alone was convenient, but it wasn’t. She was just used to being by herself; it wasn’t comfortable.
All along, she hadn’t been able to find someone compatible as a housemate. Haryeong needed someone like Kayak.
Someone with similar hobbies, easy to talk to, and who made her feel at ease and supported when they were together.
But even if Haryeong thought Kayak was that person, there was no guarantee that Kayak felt the same way. People, after all, tended to have different thoughts even when together.
‘What does Kayak think of me?’
Haryeong had immense gratitude toward Kayak, who had been helping her in every way, but conversely, Kayak might think of Haryeong as an annoying, bothersome woman who was of no help.
Thinking of the recent events, that possibility seemed very likely. Haryeong pouted slightly.
‘But recently, we were talking a lot….’
By chance, she had opened up about her painful past, and had heard Kayak’s struggles as well.
Friends became closer through such honest conversations. At least, that’s what Haryeong thought, and she hoped her relationship with Kayak would deepen.
And also,
‘I wish we could live together all the time….’
After the stalker incident was resolved, she hoped Kayak would continue living in this house with her.
It might be a slightly unreasonable wish. Haryeong knew that well.
Even now, Kayak was sacrificing many things, including her broadcast, for Haryeong.
She didn’t want to be a burden to Kayak anymore. That’s why she kept these thoughts tucked away in her heart, without saying them out loud.
“It’s okay.”
Even if it was a wish that couldn’t come true, it didn’t matter.
Just having this wish, just imagining continuing to be with someone like Kayak made her heart feel at ease.
Haryeong was able to go to bed with a calm face tonight as well.
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