It was not yet 10 AM when we arrived at our destination.
Traffic was smoother than expected, so we arrived earlier than our scheduled time.
I came in Elderin’s car, but the others planned to drive their own.
After checking in, Elderin handed me the card key.
“Want to go in first and unpack?”
“Where are you heading?”
“Yeah. I’m going to rent some stuff to play with at the pool. I also need to grab beach towels. Let’s gather everything and go shopping at the mart when Yuhan arrives.”
“Okay, I’ll wait inside.”
The satisfaction of a trip usually relates to the quality of the lodging.
The place we were staying at was a large two-story rental house with several divided rooms.
It was much cleaner and nicer than I expected, making it hard to calm my inner child-like excitement.
I picked a room on the first floor.
Going up and down the stairs would be a bit tricky for my legs.
By the time I unpacked, the rest of the crew started to arrive.
Was Ryu-hi the first to arrive?
Peeking out towards the entrance, I saw her rolling in with her suitcase.
What caught my eye was her chest area.
A tiny dog was nestled in her thin arms.
“A dog? So cute! What’s its name?”
“It’s Hisom. Say hi, it’s your big sister Da-eun. Annyeong~”
“Hi….”
Ryu-hi gently shook Hisom’s little front paw.
I waved in response.
Seeing her call me ‘big sister’ made me realize Hisom was a female.
Her fur was so white and fluffy.
I had always loved animals.
The reason I say “I” instead of “this body” is that I didn’t like them this much before.
Maybe I was indifferent to them?
But now, every time I see a cute animal, I feel this urge to pet or hug them.
Suddenly, I felt a twinge of envy towards Ryu-hi.
How could she keep such a cute dog all to herself?
…Wait, that’s going too far.
I managed to rein in my thoughts.
“Your ‘sister’ will be here soon. Sulbbang said he’d go shopping.”
“Hmm, right. We can’t come all the way here and not have a barbecue. I’ll hurry and unpack!”
Ryu-hi took Hisom upstairs.
About 30 minutes later, we all headed to the mart.
*
A wheelchair maneuvered through countless crowds.
When was the last time I rode in a wheelchair?
A few months after the incident, it wasn’t that recent anymore.
At that time, I was close to being a living corpse.
My body was just barely hanging on.
My mind was dead, and there was no better way to express it.
After sending off the teacher, it was even more so.
The nurse would occasionally take me out for a walk in a wheelchair.
But I can’t quite remember what I saw outside.
To be honest, even the memory of being in the wheelchair was hazy.
The only thing that lingered in my mind was the faint feeling of misery I felt in that quiet corridor.
Well, most of my memories from that time are like this.
Sometimes I’d snap back to reality to find myself in bed, and other times I think I saw a doctor’s face.
Dreams and delusions were all mixed up, so I still can’t tell what was real.
That’s why I didn’t really want to take the wheelchair.
The despair felt like everything had come to an end.
I was afraid I’d feel that I could never stand again.
Even in Sigma’s well-furnished lodging, my insistence on using crutches stemmed from this reason.
I became attached, in an imperfect way, to my two legs.
But… I think I was mistaken.
“Da-eun, do you want to try this?”
There was no need to answer the question.
San-sae immediately shoved a German sausage into my mouth, and I just had to eat.
Rich juice soaked my tongue.
“How is it? Should we buy a little more?”
“It’s delicious. I think it would be good grilled with meat.”
“Right? I’d better get one.”
At first, it was an unavoidable choice.
Using crutches was physically exhausting.
I was even slow, so just keeping up with others was tough.
I couldn’t expect everyone to adjust their pace for me during the trip.
If I wasn’t going to use a wheelchair, staying in the lodging would be the right choice.
But if I stayed alone in the lodging, someone would have to stay back with me.
That would be troublesome.
I couldn’t let my misery ruin someone else’s trip.
So I laid down my stubbornness, and surprisingly, things were fine.
For starters, negative thoughts didn’t arise.
Since I wasn’t moving, my body felt comfortable.
Though I was a bit bothered by the prying eyes… it got better when I put on Sulbbang’s hat.
“Don’t you want any snacks?”
“I don’t really eat snacks.”
“Really? I usually eat a lot of chocolate. Don’t you like sweet things, Da-eun?”
“I do… But I feel like I wouldn’t be able to stop once I start.”
“Ah, I know that feeling.”
Knowing that, San-sae picked a few chocolate bars and added them to the shopping cart.
It seems I’ve stepped into a stage that I can no longer control.
Seeing that, I couldn’t help but chuckle.
Yeah.
It was fun.
I can feel that I’ve really improved a lot now.
I’m no longer that person who had nothing—no possessions, no future, no dreams, no goals.
I’ve found people to share my feelings with and laugh together.
So, little by little, everything will be okay.
As a famous novel said, painful memories are like thorns stuck in your foot.
Someday, I, too, will bury my wounds in my heart one by one, and the moment will come when I can pull out the thorns.
“What kind of meat does Da-eun like?”
“To be honest, I think I liked all kinds of meat… but these days, since I’ve been eating a lot of beef, I guess it’s ribeye?”
“Your taste has gotten expensive.”
“I’ve been feeling a bit of a crisis, you know.”
This was because of Luce.
During the vacation period, the athletes’ restaurant doesn’t open, so I eat every meal with Luce.
As a result, I’ve naturally started to follow Luce’s diet.
My sensitive taste buds can accurately distinguish the difference in quality ingredients.
Now, I can gauge the quality and doneness of beef just by tasting it.
Considering that most of my meat experience was with pork belly, this is a huge improvement.
Well, I’m not picky enough to throw a fit just yet.
“Is there anything you want to eat, Shina? I’m good with whatever is served.”
“Hmm, if we’re grilling outside, I’d like pork neck? I saw we already bought some beef earlier.”
“Heh… I’m looking forward to it.”
“Yeah, me too.”
Our shopping didn’t end until the cart was completely full.
*
Back at the lodgings, a simple meal time was over.
Now it’s really time to get in the water.
It was something I’d been looking forward to, but there was one thing on my mind.
The swimsuit.
“I should have just bought a rash guard…”
What on earth was I thinking when I bought this?
Once I put it all on, embarrassment washed over me late.
What I purchased was a plain black bikini with no special patterns or decorations.
At the time, it seemed appealing.
Neutral colors usually blend in rather than draw attention.
Maybe that wasn’t a completely wrong thought.
If it weren’t for the fact that this was on my body.
My reflection in the mirror showed that my fair skin stood out unusually.
It was clean skin without any blemishes. There was nowhere to divert attention.
It was.
Therefore, my gaze became solely focused on my own body.
Besides this swimsuit.
It seemed like a considerable effort was made to emphasize beauty.
The perfectly gathered breasts created a more breathtaking valley than usual.
Slowly, my gaze descended, tracing the line of my 11-pack abs.
It naturally concentrated around my belly button before making its way along the swimsuit line to the edge of my groin.
When I glanced back at my face, it had turned red.
Something about it felt more alluring, so I turned my head away.
“Da-eun, are you done? Can I come in?”
“Yeah…”
“Oh my, it looks great on you. You surprisingly have a daring side, huh?”
“Not really.”
The one who entered was Elderin.
She was holding a sunscreen written in English.
“Have you put on sunscreen? If not, you can use mine.”
“No, I won’t.”
“What are you talking about? Don’t waste that lovely skin. Hurry up, I’ll put some on your back.”
It didn’t seem like there was any room for argument.
I obediently turned my back and sat down, and I could hear the sound of sunscreen being squeezed out – a cold sensation spread across my back.
“Eek!”
“Da-eun, your skin is really sensitive. You’re the type who’s popular with guys because you’re sexy.”
“Ah, no. It’s just cold. And I’m not sexy.”
“I tried it first, and it wasn’t cold at all.”
“…”
My head drooped down.
Let’s pretend that conversation didn’t happen.
I could distinctly feel her palm rubbing my back.
Her gentle touch moved across my shoulders, then along my shoulder blades and sides, slowly making its way down.
It felt sweet and delicate, which didn’t make me feel bad.
“I can put some on the front, too.”
“I’ll do it myself…”
“Put it on right now. You know it’s really weird to say you’ll put on sunscreen and then not do it?”
Nod.
With someone watching from behind, I had no intention of being stubborn.
Starting with the most manageable parts, like the back of my hands and arms, I spread sunscreen on my toes and legs as well.
Finally, when my hands reached the chest and belly exposed over the swimsuit, Elderin uttered a terrifying statement.
“Just so you know, the camera in the pool is on.”
“What? I didn’t hear that!”
“Yep. Just kidding. If the camera is on, Ryu-hi can’t have fun.”
Elderin burst into a fit of giggles.
For the first time, I hated Elderin.
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