“Have I ever drunk with Adele?” The answer was, of course, a yes.
But if asked whether we ever drank alone together, I could only answer no.
In the past, we were a bit slow to realize each other’s feelings, and this time, those emotions had led to a somewhat different life.
Having gazes facing each other with a little uncertainty in them felt quite natural.
Both she and I were probably seriously pondering what the other was thinking.
Though in the past, Adele and I were in a comfortable relationship as a Grand Duke and a subordinate, now we were almost equal positions of Grand Duke and Duke.
I was not her subordinate, and at least in this life, we hadn’t spent that long together.
So this moment was special—just the two of us in a drinking party with no one else involved.
As I settled into my seat, Adele, who had been silently looking at me, broke into a small smile.
With her long hair neatly tied up, Adele quietly took out a bottle of liquor.
It wasn’t something you commonly found in the center, but in the North, it was quite often seen—high-alcohol liquor.
Since Adele was known to drink quite a bit, I accepted the invitation.
If she couldn’t drink at all, she wouldn’t have taken the risk to come out like this in the first place.
“Do you drink well? You always seemed to take just a little at the banquets.”
“I drink moderately. I don’t completely abstain.”
“Is that so? Well, that’s a relief; I was going to offer just a little if you couldn’t drink.”
It seemed like she was trying to poke at my pride, but I wasn’t the type to fall for such provocation easily.
Alcohol? It was the kind of liquor that couldn’t get me tipsy even when I drank alone.
Let alone the Divine Power from the Saint, how could I possibly get drunk?
Though I didn’t mind being a little tipsy, being drunk in my position was less than ideal…
As I raised my glass, the liquor filled it to the brim.
Adele was wearing slightly more comfortable and thin clothing than usual, and I had to adjust my gaze to avoid looking at her exposed collarbone.
Though honestly, it was just a little showing. It was more exposure than usual, that’s for sure.
Was it even suitable to wear such clothes? I wasn’t sure if it was appropriate in front of an outsider like me.
I wanted to say something about it, but today was just about having fun, wasn’t it?
I carefully clasped the drink she had given me and tilted it toward my mouth.
As the fiery heat ignited within me, I furrowed my brows and quietly exhaled as my eyes opened.
The high-alcohol liquor left me feeling pleasantly warm in my body.
Seeing my reaction, Adele chuckled and finished the bottle with a gulp.
As she swallowed with a audible gulp, she emptied half the bottle and let out a small sigh.
Even after that, she seemed unfazed, gazing at me for a moment and then simply shrugging her shoulders.
“Not bad. I haven’t really had much experience drinking in a quiet place, so I was wondering. This does have its own atmosphere, after all.”
“I found it surprising that you didn’t hold a banquet. Was it intentional?”
“I wanted to talk just the two of us. When there are too many people, there are things we can’t discuss.”
From that remark, she realized that what she wanted to talk about was related to ‘memory.’
Was something I didn’t know coming to mind? As my expression hardened, Adele waved her hand and refilled my drink.
“That said, I’m not planning to do it right now. It’s fine if we just drink quietly.”
“…Have you been well during this time?”
Thinking back, I hadn’t asked about Adele since I arrived here. How she had been, what she had done. I had a vague idea, but didn’t actually know the specifics. Everything was slightly out of sync with what I remembered.
After seeing the New Year begin in the North, didn’t quite a lot change?
I had become the Head of the Family, and what was supposed to be an ongoing subjugation was neatly wrapped up. I assumed the North had undergone various changes as well, yet Adele, not responding immediately to my answer, merely gazed at me.
Her lips, glistening with liquor, caught my attention. Unlike her snow-white skin, they were vividly red. She tilted her head slightly and took a sip.
“I haven’t been well. Thanks to someone.”
Her blunt tone of blaming me made me chuckle bitterly. I thought I needed to reach out more often, and realized that Adele seemed to care about me more than I expected.
Adele’s words continued, leaving me speechless.
“You said you would keep in touch often, but it’s been two months with no letters from you. You said you were busy, yet you meet others just fine. And then there’s you, who appears uninvited in my dreams.”
“I’m sorry about that.”
“More things came to mind than I remembered before. While I still have a hazy recollection of how I died, I have a faint idea of what I was thinking while spending time with you.”
If she could fully revive those feelings, it likely meant she had regained most of her memories. The surprising thing was her inability to recall the moment of her death. I thought she would remember such an intense experience quickly, but perhaps it was something she’d remember last.
The fact that I came out in her dreams might mean it was a process of the remaining memories returning. Since I had shared so much of my life with Adele, I couldn’t argue with her comments.
Isn’t it ultimately my fault?
It was my mistake not to care much about the North, believing Adele wouldn’t mind not hearing from me for a long time.
Adele snickered at my apology, downed her drink, and reached for a new bottle.
Adele, who scoffed at my words, finished off a bottle of alcohol and pulled out another one.
Her face was slightly flushed, but she didn’t seem drunk at all.
I thought she simply found it easier to express her emotions.
“Still, I wasn’t planning on saying anything about that. I figured there was some reason behind it. But what I’m curious about is…”
Adele glanced at me for a moment, and then carefully parted her hesitating lips.
“Why were you with the Saint?”
“…Are you talking about Adrian when he became the Head of the Family?”
“Yeah, I heard you held hands and went out together.”
Seeing Adele nod, I suddenly felt a pang of regret.
Back then, I acted that way because I wanted to show that I would change when I became the Head of the Family.
The Nobles thought the same, and only Count Yugress ever asked about my relationship with the Saint, so I didn’t worry about it.
But I hadn’t considered at all how Adele, who hadn’t heard any news, would think about it.
As I pondered where to start my explanation, Adele quietly took a deep breath and pressed her forehead.
Her furrowed brow seemed to urge me to explain.
I quickly opened my mouth, fearing she would have an expression that seemed ready to explode if I didn’t have a convincing reason.
“Well, I just wanted to talk about the renewal of the Family. There isn’t any—”
“Hand.”
However, the reply I heard was something I never anticipated, and I stared blankly at Adele for a moment, tilting my head.
Hand? Adele sighed in frustration and then tugged at my wrist, placing her hand over mine.
“I asked for your hand, didn’t I?”
The warmth creeping between my fingers made my shoulder tremble slightly.
I had no desire to resist, but I was indeed flustered by how sudden it was.
Adele, who had somehow tightly grasped my hand, simply stared at it.
She wriggled her fingers, tickling my palm, and then brushed the back of my hand with her sleeve, chuckling softly.
“I can’t let anyone else hold it when I’m not looking.”
“Excuse me?”
“I’m saying don’t hold hands with anyone else. If you do, I… get uncomfortable. It makes me anxious, and then I can’t sleep.”
As she said that, Adele chuckled, her cheeks having turned embarrassingly red.
Noticing the two empty bottles of alcohol rolling next to her, I finally realized that she was starting to feel a bit tipsy.
She wasn’t completely drunk yet—just a little more honest than usual.
While I had some experience with this, it was the first time Adele acted this way in this scenario.
I was equally flustered.
“Didn’t we already catch one back in the day?”
If my memory serves me right, there was that time when we held hands and moved together on New Year’s. Didn’t we hold on while counting down? Adele nodded casually and chuckled a bit.
With her chin resting on her hand, and her elbows resting on her knees, she looked at me with a smile plastered on her face.
“Right. This time, I just wanted to hold it. I hope you start to think a little more highly of yourself.”
“I already value myself plenty.”
“No, if that were the case, you wouldn’t have tried to take over as the head of the family without contacting me. Didn’t I say that if you need help, I’ll gladly assist you?”
Adele abruptly stood up and strode toward me, poking my chest with her finger.
Her hair flowed down and brushed against my cheek.
The scent tickling my nose made my mind hazy, and I bit my lip before slowly parting my lips toward Adele.
“I thought it would be a burden.”
“If anything had gone wrong, it would’ve been you in trouble. Still, is Yuria alive? Why didn’t you consider that the opposite could be the case for you?”
Adele laughed, almost as if she found it ridiculous, and she looked a bit angry. But her emotion seemed more like concern for me rather than anger.
It was as if she finally expressed her anxiousness, the worry she felt while I was out of contact, unable to even sleep peacefully.
Then, as she opened her mouth, Adele’s hand pressed down on my chest, pushing me over.
“…I was hurt.”
She didn’t ask what she was hurt about.
Adele, now on top of me, looked down quietly.
Her face, slightly flushed, indicated she might be a bit tipsy, but the words she spoke held her true feelings.
So, as I quietly listened, Adele, who poked my forehead, continued speaking.
“Did you think I would consider it a burden if you asked for help? Am I really just a small thing to you?” “…That’s not—”
“Or what am I to you?”
I couldn’t easily respond to that, so I silently gazed at Adele for a moment.
Her usually cold eyes were slightly shaking.
I had no idea what answer would be appropriate here, even if I died a hundred times and lived again a hundred and one.
It’s not easy to understand a woman’s heart all at once. In my silence, Adele said,
“Answer me. What am I to you?”
As my body leaned, Adele’s shoulder revealed from the sliding fabric of my clothes.
In the slowly closing gap where our breaths were about to meet, Adele whispered in my ear.
“Until you say something, I don’t plan on letting go tonight.”
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