“Did that really happen?”
dramatic pause
“…Yes.”
At my answer, Rena slightly furrowed her brow. It didn’t seem like it was because she was displeased with what I said.
“It feels strange.”
“Probably.”
Rena didn’t ask me to explain the situation any further. She likely already knew some details about the incident and could infer why such phenomena were happening.
I couldn’t feel the same things that others were experiencing. Because I remembered everything from the time I rewound.
It wasn’t that memories that never existed suddenly appeared; it was simply how it had always been. Moreover, in that fantasy world, I had intentionally created situations with all my previous memories intact.
I knew for sure that I had forgotten something—and I didn’t just forget; that memory had completely vanished from my mind and then suddenly returned. I couldn’t fathom what that must feel like. I could only assume it was like waking up from a dream.
“…”
“…”
A brief silence ensued. Probably, I was the only one uncomfortable. Rena had never done anything embarrassing in front of me. Come to think of it, she had acted fairly honestly without damaging her image. Even if her expression changed, it never felt out of place, nor did anyone around her seem horrified.
Did I take my character too seriously?
“I’m sorry.”
As I was deep in thought, Rena suddenly apologized.
Not knowing what prompted such words, I stared at her silently. Rena slowly spoke with a slightly cautious demeanor.
“If it’s something so embarrassing that you have to rewind time, it’s only right to pretend it didn’t happen.”
Um…
Well, I mean, that’s true.
If you’re really close friends, you might dig up the past to tease each other. But if it’s something truly touchy, like a physical disability, you wouldn’t touch it. So, mistakes made at a party or clumsy blunders can be good material for fun.
And in that sense, most of the mistakes I had made were really at a level worth sharing.
“Even after battling so fiercely, you rewound time countless times just so we wouldn’t worry.”
“…”
Wasn’t that a stretch?
From my point of view, rewinding time just erased the dangerous situation itself. I did it not because I cared about others’ opinions, but because it was more desirable to handle it that way in battle.
Of course, I also cared about appearances. I wanted a character that was completely flawless, so I needed my combat style to be polished as well.
“Thanks to you, we’re still alive.”
“…”
Hearing such words but having no response was—no, I couldn’t reply because my heart started tingling at Rena’s words.
I’m not especially emotional, but I’m not a psychopath who feels nothing when hearing something touching either. Believe it or not, I’m the type who’d shed a few tears while watching a sad movie.
In fact, just a little while ago, I burst into tears, but that was because it touched on family love, so that was cheating. Thus, I didn’t count that time as a moment I cried. How can you go against instinct?
It might be that I didn’t cry when hearing Rena’s words because I had already cried beforehand.
“I just acted the way I wanted.”
“But thanks to that action, everything could end properly. You were the one who stopped the war, right?”
What kind of assurance does she have saying that?
Of course, the one who halted the war was me. Not exactly something to brag about in front of anyone, though.
To be honest, a part of me felt a bit proud.
“…”
“…”
After such an awkward exchange, we fell back into silence. I wasn’t used to receiving gratitude. I wasn’t accustomed to giving thanks either, but the truth is, I had hardly ever heard anyone thank me in my life. It’s something that’s said casually, but it’s not genuine—more like a greeting like “hello” when you meet someone in the morning.
Like when you hastily point out some small mistake of a friend or hold a spot while waiting for someone who’s late. It’s not dishonest, but it’s not heartfelt gratitude either.
However, what Rena was saying now was different. It was a profoundly sincere, honest gratitude.
It was the kind of gratitude Rena would express.
And maybe because of that, I felt a twinge of envy.
While I was trying my best only to end up ruining my character’s essence, Rena had consistently maintained hers without faltering from the beginning. Despite being a character who could overlap with mine.
While it’s true that it’s just her nature, then you could also say that being jealous of someone who is handsome or good at studying is envying an innate trait. Is it so wrong to feel envy toward someone who continues on effortlessly despite all the hard work I put in?
So, I decided to just throw a little shade.
“Well then, I’d like you to tell me one thing.”
Rena sat there, lips sealed, wearing a look of deep unease, so I opened my mouth loaded with jealousy. Of course, the intention was filled with envy, but I wasn’t going to openly show that emotion. I wasn’t that dumb.
“If you want, I can tell you what I can.”
But upon hearing my words, Rena’s expression became even more apologetic.
Did she think I was going to ask about the self-governing state?
Surely, from Rena’s perspective, it was plausible. To her, I was an entity that had erased an entire war by manipulating the world itself. On top of that, I was controlling Gryphons and battling countless people without breaking… Everything must make me seem inhuman when you look at the end result.
If such an inhuman being were to ask for information about a certain nation, they might think I would use it for good purposes.
Rena, who is very direct yet has an overtly naive side, wouldn’t find it strange to think that way.
And I’m sure those around Rena, like her father or the leaders of the autonomous nation, would feel the same way. Rena never hides her emotions from others. It’s clear that they’d notice that she looks favorably on me.
Could they somehow consider handing over their information to someone like that?
Well, all my worries were actually misguided; maybe it was just Rena being a typical teenager. When I think of Sophia’s case, maybe she genuinely doesn’t have any specific info to share.
However, what I wanted to ask wasn’t about the information from the self-governing country.
“I’ve shown you my hidden side.”
That was nonsense. I didn’t show it on purpose; I was just caught red-handed. But right now, Rena in front of me seemed like she’d believe if I said, “I did that on purpose.”
Being too naive can lead to regrets later. I don’t know how precious a daughter she is, but sometimes you have to let them taste the bitter truth of reality.
…At least, that’s what I thought, still filled with jealousy.
“Then Rena, wouldn’t you also be able to share your secrets with me?”
“A secret, you say?”
Rena tilted her head in confusion.
“Yes. Is there nothing you’re hiding from me?”
“…”
At my words, Rena fell silent, lost in thought.
Hiding something? Of course, there is.
She’s a cool beauty character drawn in an illustration, after all. On top of that, Rena has these fantastic ‘gap elements’ that seem like someone designed them for her.
It was a ‘gap element’ that I ended up not being able to utilize but Rena naturally utilized it from the very start. And until now, no one else has known about that ‘gap element’. Except for me, who watched Rena closely in the beginning.
…Ah, but did Mia catch wind of it? That’s one dark history I need to be cautious of. I should find a way to either trade or persuade Mia later to ensure Rena doesn’t hear about it.
“…Well, if we’re talking about hiding something, then yes, I do.”
After much contemplation, Rena cautiously opened her mouth.
“If that’s the case, how about we share our secrets? If we both learn about each other, we could become closer.”
Somehow, that sounded like something a shady old man from an adult comic would say.
Realizing that, the jealousy in my heart shivered and trembled, but by then, Rena had already nodded.
“Alright. I do have something I can show you.”
Seeing Rena determined, the guilt that had been suppressed beneath my jealousy began to resurface.
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