“……..”
“What do you want to do today? Shall we check out a little later?”
“Uh…”
“There’s plenty of time until lunch anyway, so let’s just relax a bit more?”
“That sounds good…”
“Then let’s do that. We’ll lie down a bit longer… wash up, eat breakfast, and then we can check out.”
“…Yes.”
Morning.
Well, calling it morning might be a stretch since it was slightly past the usual time, but it was still morning.
There was a bit of a problem yesterday, but thankfully, it was a rather ordinary morning.
To be precise, it felt like I was the only one being a fool that morning.
Despite what happened, I went through it four times, and the Commander treated me as if nothing was wrong at all.
Meanwhile, I was a nervous wreck just thinking my secret was out.
“…Commander.”
“Yeah?”
“…How can you be so calm?”
Even trying to voice that felt difficult.
I was afraid the awkward atmosphere from yesterday would creep back in.
The Commander was looking at me with an expression as if nothing had happened.
But I couldn’t help but think otherwise.
“…Why are you acting like it’s no big deal?”
“What do you mean?”
“…You know what I mean.”
“What’s that?”
“……..”
The Commander just smiled at me in that annoying way.
“…Why are you reacting like this?”
“Well, there must be a reason why Lindera isn’t saying anything, right?”
“……..”
How can someone be like this?
If it were me, I would definitely be curious and would have blurted out unnecessary questions by now.
The Commander wasn’t asking and seemed to think I would eventually share whatever it was.
Seriously…
“………”
I firmly believed my racing heart was not a problem at all.
“…This is just too much.”
“W-what did I do…?”
I felt like a real sucker right now.
In most situations like this, people would pry and ask a million questions.
Instead, he was just sitting there, waiting for me to say something.
“…Come here for a second.”
“Why?”
“…Just come over already.”
I pulled the Commander, who was sitting on the bed, closer to me.
I didn’t want to move because… I was naked and still covered by my blanket.
Well, it didn’t really matter too much, but still.
“Whoa…!”
“………”
“Uh… Lindera?”
The Commander came closer, and I immediately hugged him.
I had no other words to express my gratitude for how he treated me.
I felt thankful and impressed, but I couldn’t articulate it with words.
Just… maybe this would get my feelings across.
Saying thanks shouldn’t have been this hard.
I’d usually find expressing myself easier.
“…I just… really… appreciate it…”
Those words came out filled with embarrassment and guilt.
I felt grateful but also guilty.
I didn’t want to be in this bizarre situation either, but it wasn’t the Commander’s fault.
“…It’s going to take me a while to explain the details… I honestly don’t even fully understand, and there are many issues, so…”
For now.
I would tell him one day.
You know, that kind of feeling like, “Oh, remember how it was like back then?”
But right now, I doubted even that would be possible.
“I promise I’ll definitely let you know someday.”
“You don’t have to if it makes you this apologetic.”
“…I’m not making any particular expression.”
“Is that so?”
“…Yes.”
Eventually, my body relaxed as I hugged the Commander, who was holding my face with both hands.
We were facing each other.
I couldn’t see my own expression, so I had no idea.
Anyway, I was just confused.
“Well, Lindera has a beautiful gloomy face too.”
“…Don’t say weird things.”
“It’s not weird to say when it’s genuinely true.”
“………”
Every word was… just so hard to say.
Responding was difficult.
Meanwhile, the Commander was still smiling and talking casually.
“So, what about you, Commander?”
“Me?”
“…It’s nothing.”
Trying to formulate a serious response just made it harder.
If I could have said it casually, it would have been much easier.
“…But why are you holding my face like this?”
The Commander was cupping my cheeks with his hands, which felt awkward.
So, I asked him.
Why was he doing this?
Naked, facing each other, with my face cupped like a flower bowl.
“…Do we really have to be looking at each other like this?”
“I just… Your cheeks are softer than I thought?”
“What does that even mean…?”
“Since I’m touching them, they feel surprisingly good, so I’m just playing around?”
“………”
The Commander kept playing with my cheeks.
If there were sounds from squeezing cheeks, it would probably sound all squishy.
Well, cheeks don’t usually make sounds, but still…
Suddenly, my little issue was out in the open, and the Commander probably knew.
There was no way he didn’t realize after seeing my reaction this morning.
Sure, he probably wouldn’t directly address it for my sake.
“Commander, aren’t you really curious about it all?”
“I am curious, but I’m deliberately not asking.”
“Um…”
Well, that was a relief.
Frankly, I didn’t want the Commander worrying obsessively or anything.
Of course, I didn’t dislike his concern either.
“Thank you.”
“As long as you’re relieved, I’m good with that.”
Starting the day with such a surprisingly nonchalant conversation with the Commander felt nice.
We got up from bed, washed up, and it was all a normal morning.
Oh, by the way, breakfast was really delicious, probably because it was an expensive hotel.
Even though it was buffet-style, it was way tastier than I expected.
“Ah… So, this time it felt worth the high price.”
“I made sure to research thoroughly. The night view out the window was amazing too! We intentionally booked a place with a great view.”
“Oh…”
“Sure, it did cost a bit more than expected.”
Honestly, I hadn’t even focused on the night view.
I only noticed it while washing up in the bathroom, but afterward, I was too distracted by some freaky stuff happening, right?
*
“…Seriously, why is this happening?”
I couldn’t understand.
Why was there such a barrier when it came to names?
I pondered again about why I couldn’t see or hear names.
The Commander had gone back to his room, and I was alone.
After spending a whole day together, we could finally separate by evening.
Anyway.
The important part was my problem.
“…Is it because I became Lindera?”
That was the first reason that popped into my mind.
I hadn’t always had this issue.
I could see and hear names perfectly fine before entering the game.
If I had had this issue from the start, wouldn’t I have been rated at least a level four instead of a top level?
“…Should I go to a mental hospital?”
I was being completely serious.
Before, I didn’t consider it for fear of being abandoned by the Commander.
But now… since my secret was out and the Commander didn’t seem too bothered by it…
Of course, he was showing a hint of disappointment about me not calling him by his name, but after knowing the circumstances, he acted as if he couldn’t do anything about it.
“…I want to say your name too.”
I wanted to hear it.
I wanted it all to feel normal again.
Isn’t there something special about calling each other’s names and getting flustered?
“…What a crazy girl.”
I felt like I was turning into a real woman now.
Just a little while ago, I had been thinking about wanting something that really belonged to me instead of Lindera’s.
But now… I couldn’t even argue with myself on this issue.
“……. Heh.”
I let out a little laugh.
To think I’d end up like this all because of one person.
How would I think if I saw myself from when I used to think the Commander was a dangerous Casanova?
I’d definitely think that the Commander did something weird to make me like this.
“Well… The reason is indeed because of the Commander.”
Honestly, that much is true.
If he hadn’t whispered sweet things at me with that handsome face and hadn’t shown any interest…
If he hadn’t stepped in to help me when I was having a rough time because of some weirdo at the party…
“…Haha.”
It was funny how the contrast between his daytime charm and his nighttime wildness was so stark.
He really liked the naughty stuff.
I can’t believe I was his first girl.
If only I had heard about his past, it seemed like he must’ve had quite an impressive following.
“…Ah.”
Suddenly, yesterday’s incident came to mind.
The Commander’s voice when he spoke his name.
-■■■
“…It was definitely different from before.”
I was sure of it.
When I first heard the Commander’s name, it sounded almost muddled, like there was noise over it.
It felt like static or something.
“…I think I understood what he was saying yesterday. I didn’t get it then, but…”
The noise wasn’t there this time.
Only this was certain.
It was like hearing a foreign language from far away? It felt like words were being spoken, but my brain didn’t understand.
Of course, that didn’t mean I had figured everything out…
“…But I can say it’s definitely changed.”
The fact that it had changed… probably meant it was getting better.
At the very least, it was clear that this wasn’t a sign of things getting worse.
“…I should get better.”
Yeah.
If it had changed from before, there’s no way it would stop here.
Time would pass, and no doubt things would change even further.
One day, I would be able to see, hear, and say the Commander’s name without any problems.
Well, for now, it still felt like a hopeful wish.
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