Chapter: 836
I hurried my steps upon hearing that my pet had slapped a person.
According to the captain of the guards, it was a matter of catching a pickpocket, but whether they caught a thief or turned a perfectly innocent person into one was up for debate. For the sake of my face, they could have conveniently transformed a civilian into a criminal.
So, I needed to see it for myself. I had to witness whether they really captured a pickpocket or just how “slightly” bones were broken.
‘What on earth is going on?’
I sighed repeatedly as I made my way to the guard headquarters.
Though my spirits bore animal bodies, their intelligence and wit were no different from humans, so I had felt at ease. I even thought there’d be no issues as they could communicate easily with humans.
But what a mess this turned out to be. That belief led to this calamity. No matter how much of a duo of birds and beasts they were, hitting a person was just too much.
‘Please let it be a pickpocket, at least.’
So, I fervently prayed inside me.
Please, please, let the citizen that Vitality and Perseverance caught be a guilty pickpocket, not an innocent bystander. I hoped that the bear merely bumped into someone while trying to catch a thief.
‘…It must be a pickpocket.’
Honestly, while it was lamentable that they hit someone, I didn’t think they had struck an innocent citizen.
They were former evil gods after all; it isn’t like I thought, “They would never hit anyone!” I believed they were smart enough to realize that causing a stir like this would only result in their own downfall. They weren’t foolish enough to ruin the freedom they broke their backs to gain.
With such hopes and expectations, I arrived at the guard headquarters.
“Master! You’re here already! You shouldn’t have come yourself!”
Vitality welcomed me, looking anxious as it waddled around on the floor.
What a diligent little creature. Waiting at the front gate because it heard its master was coming is like a child waiting for their father to come home from work.
The real issue, though, was that I wasn’t returning home; I was just coming in.
“What about Perseverance?”
“T-they’re currently…”
As I immediately inquired about Perseverance’s state, Vitality’s eyes darted around, as if pondering whether or not it should say.
“They dug a hole and went inside it.”
Fortunately, it opened its beak soon enough, but the answer was rather striking.
“Dug a hole?”
I asked back, unable to grasp what it meant.
What did hitting a person have to do with digging a hole? There needed to be some sort of connection for it to make sense to me.
“Well, Perseverance was a little upset about losing money, and they thought it would be better to calm down alone in a deserted place…”
And as Vitality continued its explanation, I burst into laughter. While they certainly weren’t hibernating bears, the image of wanting to be alone and digging into the earth was absurd.
‘Well, that’s alright then.’
I felt a wave of relief wash over me. It seemed like I had avoided the worst-case scenario.
Despite the bear wielding overwhelming strength to knock down a pickpocket, it still wasn’t able to calm its anger. This indicated that Perseverance was furious.
Despite having eyes turning red with rage, it still only inflicted minor fractures on the pickpocket. If the enraged bear let loose, the human would likely be no more.
‘At least some reason remains.’
If Perseverance had any rationality left, the likelihood of it having beaten an innocent citizen was extremely low.
Thank goodness. It might not be the best outcome, but at least it was far from the worst.
“Master, we’re innocent! If that guy hadn’t been greedy about our money, this tragedy wouldn’t have occurred! Also, that money isn’t ours; it belongs to you!”
However, Vitality’s desperate appeal seemed to be taken as a prelude to my exploding laughter, and it continued to howl about their grievances.
Their insistence was so urgent that I couldn’t bring myself to interrupt. If I spoke up, Vitality would likely break down in tears.
“And Perseverance merely took back the money I lost! Perseverance bears no guilt! The one to blame is the person who got greedy for the money!”
‘Oh.’
This time, I was surprised in a completely different way than when I heard about the assault on the citizen.
I never expected these guys would defend each other. They were raising their voices for someone else’s safety rather than their own.
Of course, it wasn’t exactly “It’s my fault for losing the money!” but rather “That bastard who touched the money is to blame!” so the justification of Perseverance’s actions remained unchanged.
“Enough.”
Speaking with a calmer heart than before, Vitality’s beak promptly closed.
“Wasn’t the person you hit a pickpocket?”
“Y-Yes.”
“Didn’t they die?”
“They did break some bones, but other than that, they’re fine! They even said the bones would heal quickly with magic!”
“Well, that works.”
I gently patted Vitality’s head, which had been flapping around as it protested.
“Be careful moving forward. This time you were lucky to have just broken some bones, but get caught messing with anyone else, and it might get serious.”
“Master…!”
“Also, manage your cash properly.”
After delivering my final words, I took Vitality into my arms and continued walking.
Now that I made it to the headquarters, I had to talk to the captain of the guards and find out who the perpetrator was that stole the money from the eagle and bear.
Vitality’s claims and the captain’s explanations didn’t differ significantly.
“At first, we thought the pickpocket had found the lost money. So when we rushed to retrieve it, the pickpocket fled, causing a little commotion.”
“Is something broken just a ‘little’?”
“If someone who isn’t a knight collides with a bear and comes away with just a fracture, I’d say they’re lucky.”
It was confirmed that Vitality and Perseverance didn’t randomly hit someone; they were merely responding to the preemptive strike from a pickpocket.
“So why did that guy do that? Wouldn’t it be easier for him to pick on regular citizens than to mess with talking eagles and bears?”
“I heard a pickpocket’s specialty is targeting people who are excited from traveling. Even if they aren’t humans, there are no exceptions.”
The dumbass who targeted Vitality and Perseverance had no sense of discrimination.
I chuckled at how unexpectedly insane this guy was. Of course, from a criminal’s perspective, it makes sense to target excited travelers instead of locals, but they were beasts, both a ferocious bird and a fierce creature!
‘The future of the Empire is bright…’
For a mere criminal to possess such an open mind devoid of prejudice, I could only wonder how open-minded the other citizens and nobles were. It was enough to bring tears to my eyes.
“Master, can we go back to wandering around now?”
And just like that, my complex feelings were swiftly shattered by Vitality’s voice.
“I-I am willing to go back if needed.”
As I quietly regarded it, Vitality shrank, continuing its speech.
What a pathetic sight. They were crying out for their innocence, and even when it was uncovered, their worries were evident as they eyed me. They must have felt a subtle anxiety themselves.
“Fine. It’s not even dinner yet, so you can keep playing.”
I then set Vitality back down on Perseverance’s head.
They were nervous and shaky, almost pitiful. Unless someone struck them first like this time, they shouldn’t cause trouble.
Then I should let them continue playing, what else could I do? It would be cruel to deprive them of their freedom just because they got caught up in an incident.
“Have fun and relax.”
“Y-Thank you.”
When I gently patted Perseverance’s head as well, it gave a tiny nod.
Having played with these kids for a few years, they had surely mellowed. I could hardly imagine they were formerly evil gods.
Well, a docile and obedient pet is better than one with a bad temper, after all.
I felt like I might be the one losing my mind.
“Tea or vodka? Which do you prefer?”
“Tea… please.”
“Right. Actually, the empress confiscated the vodka, so I can’t give you any.”
I was summoned by the emperor once again.
I could hardly stand it. I was sick and tired of always seeing the emperor every time something happened.
Under normal circumstances, I’d think, “Oh well, that’s just my fate,” but at this moment, I was just a temporarily demoted minister. I shouldn’t have to run to the emperor like a dog!
“The count’s pet caused a ruckus in the capital.”
Surprisingly, I found that I still had to run over.
“W-What?”
“Oh, of course, I’ve heard the full story. You caught a pickpocket or something? I’m not blaming you for that.”
The emperor waved his hand as if to say not to worry, but the piercing gaze directed at me was bubbling with every possible concern.
“Still, even if it was self-defense, isn’t it an issue that beasts without any authority attacked a citizen? It’s hard to just overlook that.”
And just like that, my worries turned into reality.
There was no way to counter with a perfect excuse. It was a rationale the emperor could only rightfully be concerned about. How could I stand confidently after hearing something like that?
‘The noble’s pet slapped a citizen.’
Ignoring all context, you could summarize the situation in that one line. The beast raised under a high official had harmed a citizen; it was like a tale straight out of a history book!
It didn’t matter that the citizen was a thief or that he had stolen the precious pocket money from my pets first. The point was that Vitality and Perseverance had taken private action without the authority to detain or judge.
“If only the count had subdued the pickpocket himself, there wouldn’t be any issue. The world still thinks you’re a minister, after all. Honestly, if you picked a pocket in front of the minister of justice, you’d end up losing your head.”
“How can you get the death penalty for theft…”
“I’m just saying.”
The emperor, chuckling lightly, picked up the teapot and began pouring tea into my cup.
“Count.”
“Yes, Your Majesty.”
“Among the various titles and positions you hold, isn’t there also a seat as a member of the Risiragui Knights? Do you remember?”
“Of course, how could I forget? It’s a position I’m overwhelmingly honored to hold.”
“And a knight can certainly have retainers.”
That remark made me flinch.
Oh no, is he suggesting what I think he’s suggesting?
“Your pets, the count’s, simply make them into your retainers. Then if a similar situation arises again, from the standpoint of justification, there won’t be any issue.”
“B-but Your Majesty, is it really alright to make animals into knights? Is that something an appropriate person would do…?”
“The laws regarding the Risiragui Knights are surprisingly relaxed. There’s no law against making animals into retainers.”
Naturally, there wouldn’t be. Who in their right mind would make a beast into a knight?
What’s concerning, however, is that my name might be recorded as the first nutjob to do so. The emperor suggesting this likely means it’s closer to a command than a suggestion.
“Count. If they are recognized as retainers, even if they cause trouble, it should all be handled swiftly. If you’d prefer, I won’t insist that you deal with everything yourself every time something happens.”
“…I’ll hold the ceremony to appoint them by tomorrow.”
“Good.”
With my half-hearted surrender, the emperor nodded as though he had acted wisely.
What a pisser. I can’t believe the emperor turned me into the knight commander of beasts!
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