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Chapter 50: You call me a pig and say it’s a compliment?
“Ah!” The young princess went crazy again, feeling both embarrassed and angry, “That’s a brothel, how could I have gone there?”
The two of them argued and bickered as they entered the restaurant and sat on the second floor by the railing.
A waiter walked over and asked, “What would you like?”
“What would we like?” Lin Beifan fell into deep thought and said, “You’ve really got me there! I want to do as I please, achieve my goals, wander through mountains and lakes, stand shoulder to shoulder with the sun, dance with the moon, accompany the stars, and experience all the romance and beauty in the world…”
The young princess pounded her fist on the table and, smiling, said impatiently, “She’s asking you for your order, not your life’s ambitions! Waiter, bring us your specialty dishes, a full set! Thank you!”
“It’s a total of 12 dishes, is that really what you want?” the waiter asked.
“Yes, and add a plate of greens and peanuts!”
“That’s too much, what if we can’t finish it all?” Lin Beifan felt sorry.
The young princess blinked her big eyes and said very innocently, “It’s not too much at all. Those 12 dishes are for me, the greens and peanuts are for you. You should be able to finish it all, right?”
Lin Beifan: “…”
After a moment of silence, he quietly raised his hand and said, “Waiter, add a roast duck to our order!”
“Okay, please wait a moment, sir.”
In about an hour, all the food was ready.
“I’ll start, you go right ahead!” The young princess put out her chubby little hands and started eating happily with a mouth full of oil.
Looking at the young princess enjoying her food, Lin Beifan couldn’t help but laugh and say, “You really are a little foodie!”
The young princess got angry, “Are you insulting me again?”
“No, I’m praising you!” Lin Beifan said seriously, “Someone who looks good and loves food is called a little foodie! Someone who looks ugly and loves food is called a glutton!”
“Hmm, you make a good point!” The young princess couldn’t stop laughing.
She suddenly found that the corrupt official from before wasn’t as annoying as she had thought. He had actually found a way to compliment her!
Not bad, not bad!
Half an hour later, dinner was over and all the dishes were cleaned up. To Lin Beifan’s surprise, the young princess, despite eating so much, still didn’t look any bigger. Her ability to not gain weight was something that many women would envy.
“We’re done, can we go now?” Lin Beifan asked with a smile.
“Yes! All good things must come to an end,” the young princess nodded, blinking her watery big eyes, and said expectantly, “But if you treat me, I can eat some more!”
Lin Beifan was surprised, “You haven’t finished eating yet?”
“Mhmm…” The little princess nodded repeatedly, fluttering her eyelashes and hinting crazily.
Lin Beifan covered his face, “Don’t eat anymore, my pigsty can’t accommodate you!”
“What! You called me a pig!” The little princess was about to go crazy, “I’m telling you, you’re finished!”
“Don’t get excited, I was actually praising you!”
The little princess was confused, “You call me a pig and say it’s praise?”
“Of course, because pigs are very useful!” Lin Beifan quoted classic examples, endlessly describing the benefits of pigs, “Pig skin can be used to make boots, pig hair can be used as a brush, pig meat can be eaten, pig penis can be used to increase virility, pig faces can be used to scare people, and even their name can be used as an insult! You see, everything about pigs is valuable, so how can I not be praising you?”
The little princess was speechless.
“I’m telling you, I’m angry! I’m starving and if you don’t let me eat more, you’ll regret it!” The little princess looked at Lin Beifan, looking very cute.
“If you want more, just order it. Don’t be shy!” Lin Beifan generously said.
“Thank you! Waiter, bring me another set!” The little princess excitedly raised her hand, and proceeded to eat another set until she was satisfied.
Looking at Lin Beifan, she pouted, “We have to leave now. The total is about 300 taels, pay up!”
Lin Beifan was surprised, “Isn’t it your turn to pay?”
The little princess was also surprised, “How could it be me? I’m a princess. Why should I pay?”
“But, I don’t have any money. If you don’t pay, who will?” Lin Beifan replied.
The little princess was anxious, “How could you not have any money? You’re a corrupt official!”
“You know that I’m a corrupt official?” Lin Beifan replied confidently, “Have you ever seen a corrupt official giving money out? They all put it in their own pockets!”
The little princess was speechless.
Lin Beifan shook his head, “But I really don’t have any money on me. If you don’t believe me, search me!”
The little princess searched him, but he really had no money.
She sighed disappointedly, “Why did you leave without any money?”
“I never carry money. I just use face recognition!” Lin Beifan said seriously, “Because when they see my beautiful face, they feel ashamed and won’t let me pay. I want to pay, but they kneel down and beg me not to!”
The little princess was not happy and snorted, “You’re just freeloading and trying to justify it! I’ll pay now, but you have to treat me back double later, got it?”
Lin Beifan nodded repeatedly, “Sure, sure!”
As a result, the next night, when he returned home, he bumped into the little princess again, either intentionally or coincidentally.