“Did you come here?”
I lifted my head upon hearing that voice while crouching behind a pillar in the grand temple, which looked like it was carved from a massive chunk of gold. Ariel smiled down at me.
Wearing the same blue outfit as when we first met, Ariel’s smile was as dazzling as her brilliant blonde hair.
“You figured it out right away.”
At my words, Ariel nodded.
“Since this has always been my place, I can instantly tell what has changed. So…”
Ariel looked up at the temple we were in.
“So this is ‘my’ consciousness. It’s a strange feeling. It’s not just anyone; it’s me stepping into my own consciousness.”
“If it’s your consciousness, then how did you notice the discrepancies?”
The consciousness is literally the ‘consciousness’ of an existence. Whether based on memories, imagination, or whatever that being is thinking, that place is formed. If it were built on ‘memories,’ then surely, it wouldn’t be easy to sense any incongruities. The person holding onto the flawed memory would think it was correct, after all.
“I was wandering between the pillars when I noticed a space that wasn’t fully formed. The temple expands based on the needs of the residing gods. There can’t be ‘uncreated parts’ in such a place. So…”
Ariel looked down at me again and smiled.
“Those parts are simply places I just don’t remember. I’ve spent quite a while here, yet I still find parts I can’t recall. I thought I really need to sharpen my observational skills.”
Well, all the pillars here were intricately carved, filled to the brim. It would be hard to perfectly remember all the countless carvings of histories or myths from unknown worlds and the hundreds of languages I couldn’t even read. Plus, these pillars seemed endless.
“But… normally, wouldn’t you just fill those empty parts with something similar? The fact that there’s an empty space is even more surprising.”
“Well, maybe.”
Ariel tilted her head with a childlike expression lost in thought. Although her actions didn’t match her age, it felt oddly fitting seeing her, a goddess, making such a face.
“I guess it’s because I acknowledged something I didn’t know?”
“Acknowledged what you don’t know…?”
“Yes, instead of awkwardly trying to fill it in or forcefully figuring it out, you simply recognize it as unknown and leave it empty. That’s also how I was able to find you quickly. It’s surprisingly useful, isn’t it?”
As she added the last words jokingly, I gazed at her blankly.
“Then would it have been better to leave that story as just an unknown as well?”
“Well, who knows.”
Ariel didn’t answer my question directly; she merely replied that way.
She raised her index finger and gently swept through the air. The space her finger touched rippled like someone stirring their fingers in water. The wave that spread froze in place, forming a long, mirror-like shape above and below.
Soon, the reflection of a room appeared in that mirror.
Seo-A, and the four of us sitting across from her.
There were a few beer cans on the table, and Seo-A was simply staring at a beer can. Rina was looking elsewhere with a confused expression, unsure of what to do here, while Linea, like Seo-A, kept her gaze down on the beer can. Aurora had her head bowed, looking pale, and I was blankly staring off into space. Turner the priest stood quite a distance away, leaning against the wall, looking at us with a serious expression. Ah, he’s still here.
“Perhaps, perhaps it would have been better to leave it empty. If you wanted to avoid this situation.”
While quietly gazing at the frozen room, Ariel said that.
“Do you regret it?”
Ariel asked in a soft voice, like addressing a child.
“I… don’t really know.”
I regret it.
Of course, I regret it. If I hadn’t pried into Seo-A’s personal history here, I would have merely passed by, not knowing that Aurora’s parents were those kinds of people, and I wouldn’t have had to worry about how to face Aurora’s face moving forward, how to meet Erica at school, and how to talk to Seo-A, whom I see every day, without knowing what expression to wear.
Whether that demon, Aurora’s mother, really tried to live a clean life or intended to betray right until the end, whether she moved out of genuine love for Aurora and her family or aimed to exploit them until the very end, I wouldn’t have to suspect anything.
…I could have passed by without knowing that just one line of setting I wrote plunged countless lives into catastrophe.
Yet, at the same time, I felt that I had to hear it.
Had I not listened to Seo-A, I would have lived obliviously, being worshiped as a goddess. I would have enjoyed only the parts I found pleasant without knowing the reasons why my favorite people were suffering.
“Actually, it’s not so much regret as it is fear.”
Fear that if I hear more of the story here, I might never be able to turn back.
What if Seo-A still hates those beings? What if Aurora hears this story and begins to resent Seo-A? What if I need to tell Erica the story?
Though I am worshiped as a goddess, seen as a great hero and saint who pierces through the future with divine insights and strides forward, in reality, I’m just a pitiful guy who scribbles half-finished sentences and shoved them somewhere in my room.
To me, there is not a glimmer of future insight. All I see is pitch darkness. I can’t see how this will unfold or if it can really lead to a happy ending.
That’s why I was scared. I had no idea how to navigate within that story.
“Then, will you leave it empty?”
“…Leave it empty?”
When I asked in disbelief, Ariel slowly nodded and said.
“Yeah. Just leave it as something unknown, as it is. The part behind this.”
As Ariel snapped her fingers, the view of the room that had spread out in front of us vanished like smoke.
“If you wish, I can help with that.”
“…What about the others?”
I didn’t quite understand what Ariel meant by helping me. Was she going to erase my memories, or was she going to help me return here?
“The others will have to figure things out on their own from now on.”
Ariel replied.
“Just like they did in a time before you.”
“…There are still many unresolved matters, right? The issue of the demons must also be dealt with. Someone has to clean up afterward.”
As I muttered, Ariel gently shook her head.
“Everything you’ve done up until now is already enough.”
“Enough?”
When I asked again, this time she quietly looked at me.
“Yes, you’ve achieved what no one in that world could accomplish in less than a year. Even if you stopped here, no one could blame you. Even if you’re not there, the others will manage to get by somehow.”
“Is that the goddess’s intuition?”
“Yes, it is.”
Ariel answered softly.
“…”
I briefly glanced down at the ground and asked in a murmur.
“What if I go back? What if I say I’ll finish what I started? How should I act?”
“The only way is to clash head-on.”
At those words, I looked up at Ariel again. She still wore a soft smile on her face.
“You’ll talk to the parties involved in the story you’ve heard and figure things out yourself. But,”
Ariel’s smile seemed to brighten a little.
“You don’t have to worry too much. You’ve always done things this way.”
“…”
Listening to Ariel’s words, I quietly reflected on how I had acted in this world so far. Based on what, and for what purpose had I kept moving forward?
The answer was nothing special.
I simply moved as I wanted, following where my feet took me.
“Well, I guess there’s no method.”
I exhaled heavily and got back up.
“Are you going back now?”
In response to Ariel’s question, I nodded.
“Yeah… Even if I return here, going back at that timing is a bit off, right? It’s too embarrassing.”
Running away for good because I couldn’t understand how to face my friend after hearing their past, what kind of shameful act would that be?
“I have to finish what I’ve started with my own hands.”
As I took a deep breath and said that, Ariel let out a soft laugh.
“Is that so? In that case, I’ll wait here.”
After saying that, Ariel suddenly remembered something and exclaimed lightly.
“If I get the chance, could you invite me to that world too? I’ve always looked down from above, but it might be a good opportunity to meet face to face and chat.”
The Pope must be having a heart attack hearing this.
“Well… If needed, I can lend my body, right?”
“But then, I wouldn’t be able to talk to you.”
…Wait?
“Hey, hold on. Gods can’t directly descend to the material realm, can they? It’s impossible for the gods to come directly; I wrote that down myself—”
But upon hearing my words, Ariel simply smiled brightly.
“I’ll look forward to the next time we meet. I hope everything you do goes well. I hope you can welcome a happy future.”
“Uh, hold on! If you’re going to tell the story, finish it—”
But before I could finish that last sentence, I was abruptly flung back to my body from Ariel’s consciousness.
The pungent smell of alcohol pricked my nose.
*
“…”
Ariel, who had been sitting in the chair, slowly opened her eyes. The ever-present golden light in that space greeted her. However, it looked somewhat different from what she had just seen in her consciousness. It seemed like the light had faded.
The fact that not only the unseen parts but also the memories of the places she always saw were different made her smile faintly.
“I’m back.”
Baal spoke to her.
“It seems like you are getting better at using your powers as time goes on, doesn’t it? Now you’ve even stepped into the goddess’s consciousness.”
“If you think of her as goddess too, the sensation wouldn’t be too different from yours stepping into her consciousness.”
“Is that so?”
Baal shrugged.
“I have one question.”
Ariel said to Baal.
“When you were creating the vessel to send her to that world, didn’t you say it should not be made with excessive power?”
“That’s true. I still think so.”
“I see.”
Ariel closed her eyes for a moment.
“Then indeed…”
“Of course. It wouldn’t be any different from what happened with us. What one person can do, another person can do as well. Even if it’s something the others call a god.”
With an unexpectedly cheerful expression, Baal added.
“Ah, of course we didn’t add anything to that power. We gave her a sufficiently strong body and a physique that can withstand the power of miracles.”
“But that holy power is her own strength.”
“Correct.”
“And no matter how strong the holy power is, using the power of miracles doesn’t necessarily prove one can become a god.”
“True.”
Baal nodded in agreement with Ariel’s words.
“No matter how strong the miracles are, in the end, it’s merely using the power of a god.”
“Then, that strength is indeed.”
“Right, it comes from faith.”
Baal said with a bright smile. This was an expression that ‘rarely appeared’, and even Ariel was seeing it for the first time.
“It is the strength born from a spotless belief in that existence without wanting anything in return. And perhaps that first belief was our mutual faith.”
Baal pulled a chair from thin air and sat down.
“Therefore— if we must be specific, that strength can’t be seen as having suddenly awakened. By the time we met her, and at the moment we sent her down to that land, she already had two believers, didn’t she?”
“Isn’t it true that you don’t agree with the idea of a primordial god who created this world?”
At Ariel’s question, Baal scoffed.
“Yes, I don’t agree. Even until now.”
“Then did you still believe in it?”
“Not at all. I trusted your judgment and deemed her previous life to be worthy of belief. Even if that first belief was not faith, it wouldn’t matter since there was no desire, so it was truly a pure belief.”
Baal said so, fixing his gaze on Ariel and then asked.
“And you, did you not believe?”
“No.”
Ariel shook her head.
“I brought her here because I believed.”
“Exactly.”
Baal muttered in reply, then looked down at his hands. He clenched and unclenched his fists a few times while gazing at them, before lifting his head again.
“A god is a being with nowhere to lean on. That’s why I’ve always disliked being called a god.”
“You called it being without a place to pray to, didn’t you?”
“Yeah.”
A momentary silence enveloped the two. But it wasn’t the heavy and unbearable kind. They were simply lost in thought, not speaking.
“Do you have regrets?”
Baal suddenly asked.
“…Well.”
Ariel lowered her head slightly as she spoke.
“Perhaps, it could be so. After all, I’ve brought someone who is so willingly and happily willing to help others to a place like this to suffer.”
“Well then, there’s no need to worry.”
Baal answered, slightly closing his eyes.
*
“When I regained consciousness, the demon was dead.”
Seo-A continued her story.
“The corpse touching the holy sword was burning. The man was trying to put out the flames on the body with his bare hands.”
Seo-A’s hands trembled slightly as she spoke.
“…The child was crying.”
Without saying it, Seo-A I felt I could imagine how horrific the scene must have been. The sound of bones cracking, the cries of a husband mourning his wife, and the wailing of a child.
“That man…”
The one who broke the silence first was Aurora, who had kept her mouth shut until now. Her voice was cracking.
“What happened to him?”
“The priests present there could treat his burns and injuries at the time, but the mental scars were not something that divine power could heal. The man couldn’t hold out for long.”
Once again, while Seo-A omitted many details, I could roughly guess how the man’s fate turned out.
It was an utterly, utterly horrifying story.
“…”
For a long time, none of the people there dared to speak.
“You…”
The one who broke that silence was Seo-A.
“How… have you been?”
Seo-A asked with a voice trembling, though not as much as Aurora’s.
“After that…”
Aurora took a moment to close her eyes, as if trying to calm herself.
“I don’t have clear memories. Maybe it’s because I was too young, or maybe it’s because I experienced too much at once, I can’t quite tell. I don’t have much recollection of that day either.”
With that, Aurora began to share her story slowly.
“Not long after I became alone, a golden-haired sister came to me. She took my hand and told me I was now her responsibility.”
“Yeah, she would say that with a nonchalant expression.”
Seo-A let out a sigh.
“Initially, I lived in a convent. But I couldn’t adapt easily. After all, I had my background to consider.”
“…”
“I wonder if she sensed that I was having trouble adjusting; somehow, that person over there—”
Aurora pointed towards Turner.
“Came to fetch me personally. And from then on, I worked as an assistant to the Miracle Investigator.”
Seeing the gazes on her, Turner shrugged lightly.
“I was asked by Andrea. Believe it or not, I was in the same place during my childhood.”
“Childhood? Convents and monasteries are usually built far apart…”
When I asked that, Turner shook his head.
“Oh, no, not at all. The place Andrea and I were at wasn’t a legitimate one. You might have heard of a dubious place gathering children from demi-human regions to make them do suspicious things; it was somewhat like that. Fortunately, we were rescued before anything serious could happen.”
“Ah…”
I shut my mouth.
“So I’ve known the head of the Inquisition since childhood. Although we were apart for a while, we occasionally ran into each other while managing our respective duties. Of course, it’s not like we have a particularly close relationship, unlike other acquaintances… but it’s enough of a connection to be able to ask for significant favors.”
“Is that so…”
“Yes, indeed. To be honest, my memory is a bit hazy now.”
As he said this, Turner casually popped open a can of beer.
“I see.”
After hearing Aurora’s story, Seo-A quietly muttered.
“Honestly, I didn’t think it was you when I first saw you. It’s something I had tucked away in the corners of my memory for such a long time. I only realized you were the child from there just a short while ago.”
Then silence fell for a moment.
“I’m sorry for making you carry such memories in your childhood because of me.”
“…”
Aurora looked quietly at Seo-A’s shaking hands and slowly reached out to hold both of her hands tightly.
“No, teacher, you were just… finding what you could do. To correct the wrongs. Ideally, I should have lost my parents much earlier. My being there was merely unfortunate.”
And then Aurora squeezed her eyes shut.
They sat like that for a long while.
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