On the way back from the purification facility, the inside of the car was quiet, with no sounds of conversation.
Flone had fallen asleep while I was teasing Dwight, leaving a drool stain on my shoulder, while Dwight, sulking from my teasing, turned his head and stared out the window.
In between these two, I was lost in thought about the story I had heard today.
Through the window, I could see the boundary line dividing the outer and inner city in the distance.
Though it was invisible to the eye, a barrier was set up there.
There had been various incidents, but the barrier was still an indispensable device that prevented magic from invading the city.
However, having learned the secret of the barrier today, to me, it felt like a bomb that could explode at any moment.
Right now, it was protecting the city, but once it detonated, it would engulf the entire city and all its inhabitants.
All I could do was hope that this bomb wouldn’t explode.
While I was lost in these thoughts, the car, which had been speeding along, approached the boundary line indicating where the barrier was.
And the moment the car’s front wheels crossed the boundary line,
An instinctive aversion overwhelmed me.
A warning bell rang in my head.
It urged me to jump out right that instant.
To not cross that line.
But in that instant where I couldn’t move because of Flone leaning on my shoulder, the car sped past the boundary line completely.
The barrier rejected the invasion of magic, and I was not a being permitted to enter this city.
It was then I realized.
“Ugh…!”
Nausea bubbled up within me.
I felt a powerlessness and a draining sensation as if all the strength had been sucked out of my body.
Flone’s head resting on my shoulder felt unbearably heavy.
Sweat poured out of me in such large amounts that Flone’s drool on my shoulder seemed trivial.
With great effort, I raised my arm and covered my mouth.
If I didn’t, either a curse or the snack I had eaten earlier during work would surely come out, and neither option seemed pleasant.
This was no trivial matter.
I had heard that demonic beasts became extremely weak once they forcibly crossed the barrier, but I never imagined it would be to this extent.
Why hadn’t I known this before?
As I pondered whether I had ever crossed the barrier like this, I realized that this was the first time I had done it while fully conscious.
When I was kidnapped by the elf Sator or abducted by a witch during a facility tour, I had lost consciousness by the time I was rescued and brought back into the city.
Thinking about it, each time I went through such experiences, I always felt sick, and now I thought I understood why.
“…What’s wrong? Are you feeling unwell?”
As I struggled to expel the nausea, Dwight, who had been gazing out the window, asked with a puzzled tone.
His words brought forth a rush of anxiety.
I was in no condition to act as if I were fine.
If he looked closely, my face might appear serious.
It was understandable for him to be curious, given that I had gone from being perfectly fine to suddenly looking terrible.
However, if he found out that my condition had worsened because of the barrier, it would be the end of it.
Thinking that I had to avoid any situation that could raise suspicion somehow, I frantically wracked my brain for an excuse.
“…I’m not sure. I might be feeling a bit nauseous, either from motion sickness or something.”
“Hmm, come to think of it, you did say you were unwell until yesterday. Perhaps since your body hasn’t fully recovered, overexerting yourself today might be why.”
Was it fortunate that I had been feeling unwell until yesterday?
Dwight seemed to have accepted my explanation without suspicion, attributing my current state to my lack of full recovery.
As a sigh of relief escaped my lips internally, Dwight suddenly lowered his head as he spoke to me.
“…I’m sorry. I feel bad that you had to endure the facility tour because of me when you’re not well. I should apologize for that.”
I quickly shook my head and replied.
“…No, why are you apologizing suddenly? I chose to go along for the tour.”
Dwight muttered in a somber tone.
“…I could tell you weren’t very interested in the facility from the start. Normally, someone like that would be sent back first; it’s a waste of precious time. But my selfishness prevented me from doing that.”
“…Selfishness?”
“…Scarlet, I wanted to share the charm of magic with you. I thought that if we shared similar interests, we could become a little closer. But I was so caught up in my own thoughts that I didn’t consider your condition… Will you accept my apology?”
I was slightly surprised, having never imagined Dwight would be thinking such things, and I nodded my head.
Under normal circumstances, I might have been happy and smiled at his words about wanting to get closer.
However, right now, I couldn’t muster a laugh.
Dwight was completely innocent in this matter, yet I had to deceive him to keep my secret.
I simply hated myself for being in such a situation.
*
The car that had entered the city dropped us off in front of the teleportation gate.
“Scarlet, Dwight! Let’s play with Flone again next time! See you later!”
Flone, who had been blissfully asleep, woke up with a refreshed face, bid us farewell, and left first. I exchanged somewhat awkward goodbyes with Dwight before parting ways.
“…I should head out too. Take care of yourself.”
“…Yeah, see you next time.”
Feeling a prick of conscience from Dwight’s gaze mixed with concern and guilt, I moved my feet.
The journey back home felt more exhausting than ever before.
Was it because I had weakened after crossing the barrier, or was it for some other reason?
Finally making it back home, I suddenly felt the urge to see Yoon Si-woo.
I thought that if I could share what had happened today with him, I might feel a bit better.
But unfortunately, Yoon Si-woo wasn’t home when I returned.
He had mentioned he had something to do today, so perhaps he was coming back late.
I felt a significant disappointment at this realization and flopped onto my bed.
My body, drenched in sweat, felt uncomfortable, but I was in no condition to shower or do anything like that.
With great effort, I pulled the blanket up and covered myself.
The thoughts that had crossed my mind when I crossed the barrier resurfaced.
A being with magic, unwelcome in this city.
I was that kind of being.
Today, the weight of that knowledge felt particularly heavy.
I hated being me.
I had a few advantages, one of which was my ability to think positively even in tough times.
But there were days when nothing I did could manage to keep those thoughts at bay.
Days when my mind was filled with negativity no matter what I did.
Today felt like one of those days.
I pulled the blanket over my head, covering myself completely.
So that no one could see me.
So that not even a sound of my breathing could be heard.
I would have to live my life stifled, ensuring my true identity remains hidden from others.
For quite some time, not even a sound was heard under the blanket.
Then, a small sob escaped me before quieting down.
*
The worst.
That was the first thought that struck me when I opened my eyes the next morning.
I felt drained of energy.
Like someone had wrung my body out like a rag and left me with nothing.
Yet, despite that, I struggled to get up.
The thought that I needed to put something into my body filled my mind.
As I stepped into the living room, I found an omelette rice covered with plastic wrap on the dining table.
Next to it, a small note read:
“I have to leave early today. You looked tired, so I prepared breakfast for you. -Yoon Si-woo.”
Sitting blankly at the table, I unwrapped the plastic wrap and took a spoonful of the omelette rice.
The gently garnished ketchup on the omelette rice was quite tasty.
It was delicious, but.
After chewing for a moment, I put down the spoon.
…This isn’t it.
That thought surfaced in my mind.
Leaving the dish and spoon on the table, I stood up.
I took my phone out to check my messages.
The message pointed out a location for helping dispose of the demonic beast carcasses, continuing from yesterday.
Suddenly, the word “deficiency” popped into my mind.
Deficiency, lack.
If something is lacking, it must be filled.
Fill it? With what?
I glanced at the screen on my phone.
The words “demonic beasts” seemed to jump out at me.
The instinct to fill the lack became a compulsion.
Blankly, I set my feet toward the place indicated on the screen.
*
As I approached the location mentioned in the message, I saw a crowd of people.
Individuals dressed in suits resembling spacesuits were grunting as they moved the carcasses of the demonic beasts.
A sudden impulse surged within me, but I shook my head.
I couldn’t be near people.
It would be troublesome if I got caught.
So naturally, I walked away from the crowded area.
Slowly, while surveying my surroundings.
What I was looking for were the carcasses of the demonic beasts.
The bodies that were out of the sight of people.
Before long, I would find what I sought.
Deep in a dark alley, a carcass of a demonic beast lay abandoned.
The strong impulse consumed my body, but I first looked around.
There were no people.
No one would notice me.
With a chuckle, I walked into the alley.
As time passed, the carcass of the demonic beast, showing signs of decay, began to ooze out magic gradually.
Along with the notorious stench of a rotting corpse.
As I stood before the carcass, the impulse intensified.
And at that moment, I had no reason to resist that impulse.
Realizing that I had unconsciously buried my face in the carcass.
I greedily inhaled deeply.
As the black-hued magic flowed into my body, I shivered involuntarily.
Filling the emptiness brought pleasure.
But it was still not enough.
What I could inhale each breath was insufficient compared to what had been evacuated.
In a moment of instinct, an efficient way to absorb the magic came to my mind.
Suddenly, a flame erupted from the hand gripping the carcass.
The flames engulfed the carcass whole.
And the carcass now enveloped in fire erupted with a dark smoke.
I inhaled the smoke deeply.
An overwhelming sense of fulfillment surged, enough to make my eyelids flutter.
I inhaled the smoke non-stop.
But it was not enough.
I still needed more.
I had to absorb all of this and find another carcass—
“…Scarlet?”
A voice from behind made me turn around.
A girl with orange-tinted hair and a petite frame stood there.
Oh no.
I’ve been caught.
“What are you doing there?”
Startled by the girl’s puzzled expression, I felt panic rise within me.
It would be troublesome to get caught.
Right.
It would be bad if I was found out.
What should I do?
I pondered for a moment.
Then instinctively, a way to prevent it from being troublesome popped into my head.
I looked at the girl and then lowered my gaze.
The flames still flickering on my hand, fresh from burning the carcass.
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