Chapter 15
Thud!
My shoulders jumped at yet another loud sound.
“Lania, this noise has been happening for a while now. Do you know what’s going on?”
“That’s probably because of that guy.”
Lania pointed with her index finger. Following her finger, I saw this weirdly shaped guy twisting around on the floor.
“Huff…! When did that thing get here?!”
“It’s been here since before I arrived.”
“Really?!”
“Guruk, Guruk!”
The guy, with arms that looked absurdly massive, was wheezing and rolling around on the floor.
“By the way, where are the cookies hidden? I’ve been smelling something delicious for a while now.”
“Oh, I’ll bring them out right away with some tea.”
“Just give me a few to snack on as I go.”
“Do you want them now?”
I pulled some cookies off the shelf and shoved about five into Lania’s hands. I grabbed a plate and stacked it high with cookies, then picked up the jar of tea leaves.
“I’ll bring over the tea in a jiffy.”
“That sounds good… huh?”
While munching on a cookie, Lania suddenly stared wide-eyed at the jar of tea leaves I was holding.
Crunch, crunch, gulp.
After rapidly stuffing her face with cookies, she spoke with a tone of disbelief.
“You’re not trying to poison me today, are you?”
“Excuse me?”
“The thing you’re holding, it’s a poison plant.”
“What?!”
Startled, I let go of the jar of tea leaves I was holding.
Roll, thud!
The jar rolled to the floor, thankfully made of sturdy glass, so it didn’t break.
“That was a poison plant?!”
“You didn’t know? It’s super toxic. Of course, it wouldn’t affect me much, though.”
Lania jammed another cookie in her mouth while she spoke. I had to suppress the urge to cry.
“What am I supposed to do? We’re out of tea leaves at home…”
“Don’t worry about it. I don’t really like that stuff.”
“But… Ah! Mia did bring some fruit!”
I suddenly remembered that Mia had brought back some fruit along with the veggies and meat. Quickly, I went to the freezer and grabbed the chilled fruit.
“I’ll whip up some juice for you.”
“Oh, that sounds great.”
Lania beamed and lifted the plate piled high with cookies.
“Well, I’ll be off then. Oh, what about that guy?”
“Ah…”
I finally remembered the bizarre man still rolling around on the floor. By now, he had fainted, foam forming at his mouth.
“Hmm, I think I should show this to Mia first…”
“Let me handle it.”
Shrugging, Lania lightly waved her hand to draw a magic circle, and chains shot out from it, binding the guy tightly.
“Ah, be careful in the future.”
“What?”
“Gulp. Just be cautious, okay? Creeps like this might come back.”
“Alright, I should probably get some security tools ready.”
Lania nodded and left the kitchen.
“Phew… I’m relieved there weren’t any serious problems.”
I placed my hand on my chest and sighed in relief, looking around the kitchen for tools to make the juice.
“Huh?”
Before I could find a juicing tool, my eyes landed on the jar of tea leaves I had dropped earlier. While dragging the man away, I must’ve knocked it over, as the lid was open and the tea leaves were all over the place.
“Oh no… it’s going to take forever to clean this up. I can’t just leave it like this since it’s toxic…”
Reluctantly, I set the fruit aside, picked up a broom, propped the half-empty jar on one side, and started gathering the spilled poison plant into a pile.
‘I’m not sure what kind of poison plant this is, but since Mia might use it, I’ll keep what hasn’t spilled and just throw away the rest.’
I glanced around for a dustpan but didn’t see one. So, I had no choice but to scoop up the poison leaves with my hands and toss them into the trash. After repeating this about three times, the leaves were finally all cleaned up.
“Phew, done – ugh!”
Just as I was going to wipe my brow with the back of my hand, a sharp pain shot through. My palm was swollen, looking like I had put giant gloves on!
“Oh no, I thought since they were dried herbs, they wouldn’t have much effect unless consumed directly.”
Shaking out the throbbing from my hand, I sighed.
“This is going to take a while.”
I wouldn’t be able to do any delicate work until the swelling went down. But simple tasks were manageable. First, I closed the lid on the glass jar and set it aside.
Next, I got out a cutting board and a knife. My palm felt like I’d been beaten a dozen times with a stick, but it didn’t hurt enough to stop me from cooking, so I powered through.
Just in case there was any poison left on my hands, I washed them in cold water and placed the fruits on the cutting board.
“What kind of fruit is this?”
The fruit looked like a donut, wrapped in multiple layers resembling corn husk. The only difference was that the husk was tougher.
Slice.
As I cut one side, a red liquid gushed out. The inside looked so red it could almost be mistaken for meat. The juice running out made it even more suspicious.
“Is this really a fruit?”
It had a slightly blood-like smell that raised my eyebrows. Thinking it might be interesting, I cut a tiny piece to taste, and it wrapped my tongue in a sweet and sour flavor.
“Hmmm!”
‘Hmm, it looks deceiving, but it’s incredibly sweet and delicious?! I could totally use this in cookies or cakes later! Or maybe just make juice for the kids to enjoy…’
I giggled to myself as I peeled off the hard outer layer and sliced up the juicy flesh. I then pulled out a large bowl, big enough to serve five people, and dumped all the flesh into it.
‘It’s so ripe, I could just mash it with my hands!’
Since I didn’t have a blender or any juicing tools, I had to wash my hands one more time before getting down to mashing the fruit by hand.
‘Oh, this is pretty easy!’
The swelling in my palms made it super simple to mash the fruit. After all my experience of living in a comedy world, I happily squished the fruit, using my ‘always find a positive spin for survival’ skill.
“Phew… all done.”
I took out two cups, filled them with juice, and set them aside. My plan was to tidy up the kitchen a bit before bringing them over.
“What a mess…”
There was so much juice everywhere that not only the kitchen table but also the floor was stained a deep scarlet. My beige clothes were no exception—they were also splattered as if I had done some weird dye job.
“It looks like a murder scene.”
I’d heard that spilled blackberries could resemble blood. That’s exactly how the floor looked right now.
‘Time to clean this up quickly.’
The floor and table were made of hard tiles that didn’t soak up liquid and were easy to clean, but the chopping board was wood, and the knife’s handle was wooden too. They’d stain easily.
After quickly washing the bowl, chopping board, and knife, I wiped down the table first with a cloth. The cloth immediately stained crimson. Once I’d cleaned the table enough, I knelt down and began scrubbing the floor.
‘This cloth was pretty worn out already; it’s the perfect excuse to get rid of it.’
I soaked up the pooled juice with the cloth, then squeezed it out in the sink, getting rid of the liquid. I knelt again and continued scrubbing the floor. When most of the juice was gone,
“Lian, is our meal almost ready -…?”
“Oh, Noah. Sorry, I got caught up with something. I’ll finish this up and get it ready.”
I awkwardly smiled while mopping up the last of the spills as Noah stood at the kitchen entrance, looking stiff. Most of the mess was gone, leaving only a pale red streak.
‘Just a couple more wipes, and this will be sorted out.’
Thinking about it, I stood up and wrung out the crimson-soaked cloth over the sink.
Drip, plunk.
The deep red liquid splattered inside the sink.
‘Oh no, am I going to stain my hands?!’
I sighed as I looked at my juice-soaked hands, getting ready to kneel again when Noah approached me quickly.
“What the heck is this?”
“Huh?”
Noah grabbed my hand, which was holding the cloth, and lifted it. The swelling was going down slowly, but it was still noticeable.
“Uh, well…”
I felt way too embarrassed to admit I got into this mess by foolishly handling poison.
‘Should I just say I had a run-in with a bug? No, I’ll say a mosquito bit me instead.’
It wasn’t an absurd idea at all. This was the land of the Demon King, where terrifying monsters roamed! It wouldn’t be weird if a ridiculously huge mosquito had bitten me.
“I got bitten by a bug or something. It’ll go down soon. Don’t worry about it.”
Knowing Noah was quite the worrywart, I replied with a sheepish grin. Noah’s face twisted with concern as he continued,
“This is… the result of getting stung by a bug? So, where’s that bug?”
“Well…”
“And what’s with this bloodstain?”
With a shaky gaze, Noah pointed at the juice soaking my clothes, making it look like I was steeped in blood.
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