Chapter: 149
The Regretful Saintess Runs Through Time (12)
It was a lonely life.
That cursed thing.
A situation where isolation was inevitable.
I had tried to resist. When I was eight years old, I broke my father’s advice and befriended a maid, sharing all my secrets with her.
But… the result was horrific.
My first friend betrayed me.
She sold information about me and nearly got me killed. Because of that sin, she was caught by my father and turned into a mere handful of blood before my eyes.
Since then, I’ve locked my heart away.
Instead, I drowned myself in alcohol and entertainment, avoiding all the troubles of the world.
I didn’t want to think.
Thinking only brought up painful memories.
I didn’t want to be sane.
Because facing the fact that nobody loves me in this world would make me feel worse.
So I got drunk.
Filled my head with gambling and revelry.
Then I thought I wouldn’t get hurt at all. That’s what I was convinced of.
“Did you hear? That punk beat someone up for a trivial reason and left them crippled!”
Sure, I just handled a weird guy who tried to drag me to some strange place, saying he wanted to party.
But who cares.
“They say he beat up the poor First Prince and left him bedridden!”
I only asked my older brother if he was crazy for trying to grind people up to fill his own talent. I never laid a finger on him.
But that didn’t matter either.
“Anyway, you all will hate me no matter what I do, right?”
I no longer want to be loved.
I’ve given up all expectations from you people, so you should give up all expectations for me.
So, I just get drunk to forget everything.
Forget the world and live happily, ignoring all my suffering.
Just leave me be.
That’s how I thought while running away from everything.
…Even after Sion showed up.
I was so happy to finally have an ally. I was so joyous that I utterly refused to lose him.
That’s why I ignored all the suspicious circumstances.
Even when it was time to talk, I dodged the conversation.
Back at that tavern, I ran away without listening to Sion’s explanation.
And this is the result.
Fire and blood, corpses piled high like a mountain.
The stench of death brushing against my nostrils.
A dying knight. My only ally. The one person who stood with me in this world.
All my escapes led to this worst outcome.
If only… just a little bit had changed.
If I had listened to Sion even a little, if I had given him time to explain, if I had just believed in him.
Everything would have been different.
But no matter how much I regret, I can’t turn back time. In the end, the brutal reality unfolded before my eyes once more.
“Run away. Survive so we can meet again. There’s still so much we need to do.”
Sion spoke like that.
He was telling me to just let him die, to leave him behind and find a safe place.
There was no way I could accept such nonsense.
“N-No! Let’s run away together! We’ll hide somewhere safe! I’ll find a way to heal you… somehow!”
So I said, but Sion shook his head.
He just left one simple word behind.
“Princess….”
His trembling hand. Skin as pale as a corpse. Blood spilling from his mouth. With a quaking voice fighting through the pain, he conveyed that message to me.
There was no way I wouldn’t understand its meaning.
After all, that kid was the genius known as the youngest Sword Master. He knew better than anyone what state his body was in.
That’s why he said it.
That he was going to die soon anyway.
He didn’t want me to see him like this. So please, just run away, survive.
I wanted to say no.
Life without you carries no meaning, so if you’re going to die, I want to die alongside you. But my mouth wouldn’t budge.
Sion’s last will.
There was no way I could ignore that.
So I just nodded and promised to survive. I had to promise him, and I had no choice but to run away, leaving the dying knight behind.
Breath growing ragged. My legs felt like they were tearing apart. My shoes had long disappeared, and blood was gushing from my soles.
Yet, I still ran.
It was the last request of the only one who stood by my side.
I didn’t know where to run to.
I had no clue what to do. I didn’t know anything but…
I couldn’t betray Sion again.
I absolutely couldn’t betray that trust. So no matter what happened, I must survive…
“Found you! That witch is over here!”
It was at that moment.
I was caught by the citizens around the palace.
A spear aimed at my nape.
I had been caught.
Stumbling upon my identity just by sheer bad luck while trying to escape.
I couldn’t help but chuckle.
Wasn’t this just a repeat of the same thing?
It was the same when I was a maid. No matter how much I resisted, the outcome was always the same. Despite my efforts, I always ended up in this pathetic state.
Whatever I did ended in failure.
Only unfortunate things kept happening.
So maybe I should just give up…
‘No, I can’t.’
I grit my teeth.
Forcefully shaking off the habitual weakness that had embedded itself in me. I couldn’t ignore the painful things any longer.
No matter how painful it was, I absolutely couldn’t give up.
“Stop! I said stop!”
Biting, swinging my fists, using every means possible, I somehow managed to shake off his grip and took off running.
Did I get cut by a spear during the scuffle?
Blood spurted out from my stomach. I was dizzy, and my mind was barely working.
But still…
I didn’t stop running.
If I couldn’t walk, I’d crawl on my hands and knees.
If my feet wouldn’t move, I’d use my hands.
Somehow, someway…
‘I need to repay that trust…’
My sight blurred.
My body had long exceeded its limits and stopped moving. And such a defenseless sight wouldn’t just be left alone by the people.
A man stabbed my heart with a spear.
That man yelled he had saved the world while cheering… before looking back up at the sky again.
The black sun.
The still-red sky.
The landscape unchanged.
“Uhh…?”
A dazed voice escaped from the man’s lips. He looked up at the sky, doubting his eyes, but there was no change.
The sky remained red,
And the world was still on the brink of destruction.
After staring blankly for a while, the man looked back at me. His face twisted with hatred.
He had no one else to take his anger out on since he couldn’t lash out at the sky.
So he poured all his fear and suffering onto me.
“It’s your fault! What did you do? It’s all your fault! So die! Die, you witch!”
The spear pierced through me.
Again and again, again and again.
But I felt no pain.
The sensation had long since faded, and I had grown accustomed to accusations like those.
But if there was something bothering me…
It was just the regret of not being able to fulfill the boy’s request. Sion had given me so much for my sake.
Even at the last moment.
I had failed to repay Sion’s faith.
That very fact weighed heavily on my heart.
My consciousness gradually faded.
The last thing that appeared in my darkening vision… oddly enough, was a statue.
How ironic that, after running away, I ended up at the Holy Church. I chuckled despondently while gazing at the statue.
I had never once believed in a god throughout my life.
And why would I?
There was no reason for me to like a god who had ignored all my earnest prayers.
Prayers to lift my curse.
Prayers to give me friends.
Prayers to make my father love me.
All those desperate prayers were ignored by the god.
‘But.’
Still, if you really are watching over me, if you truly love and cherish everyone like they say in the scriptures.
‘Just once, please.’
A chance.
A chance to atone for my foolishness.
With that final prayer, Yuli completely closed her eyes.
*
Amid the panic of fleeing citizens, the dark temple remained, housing a single horrifically mutilated corpse. The only sound echoing was the screams.
Yet… in that place devoid of light, a glimmer began to shine. Waves of light flowed from the statue.
Darkness slowly vanished from the black markings etched on the girl’s back, replaced only by radiant light.
Signs of a saint.
Proof of being loved by the divine.
A power that could shake the laws of the world at will.
The saint who had rejected the god finally achieved a miracle in her last moments.
Soon, pure white light enveloped the world.
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