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Chapter 1

Chapter 1. What Are These Two Up To?

Unknown Continent, Qiankun Nation, Five-Colored City, Certain Inn.

On the second floor by a window at a wine table, a young man and a young woman sat.

The boy had neat short hair, handsome features, and a charming appearance.

The girl had long flowing hair, fair skin, and a cute demeanor.

The warm sunlight streamed in through the window, giving them a radiant glow.

In this setting, no matter who saw this young couple, a myriad of words would instantly come to mind to describe them: a golden boy and jade girl, a perfect match, talented and beautiful, a pair of gifted individuals…

Unfortunately, as people approached and saw the lifeless fish eyes of the two, all the beautiful fantasies were instantly shattered, and in everyone’s mind, three words came to mind unanimously: two lazy dogs!

“Lazy… ugh… no, no… it’s dear guests!”

The waiter, accompanied by a smile, quickly corrected his slip of the tongue: “This is a large plate of peanuts and drinks for two guests, served hot… Uh, I mean… sorry for the inconvenience!”

“Wow.”

The young man’s voice was indifferent: “Twice in five seconds, this little brother really has some skill. Don’t you agree?”

The girl couldn’t help but yawn: “Indeed!”

“Ah, this…”

The waiter was a bit at a loss, unsure how to proceed. Perhaps he should say: Thank you for the praise? But it felt like he would get slapped if he said it out loud!

Luckily, the shopkeeper came over in time to rescue the situation: “Sorry, sorry, Young Master Hei, Miss Hongli, this kid is new here and not familiar with your preferences…”

The shopkeeper turned his head, looking sternly at the waiter: “Remember, from now on, even if these two order drinks, change them to fruit juice. Got it?”

“Shopkeeper, keep it down.”

Hei Yang coughed softly: “No need to make a big deal out of this kind of thing…”

“Indeed.”

Hongli nodded: “Please also consider my feelings.”

“Ah, yes, my bad.”

The shopkeeper quickly apologized, then lowered his voice to instruct the waiter, “Hurry up and change it to fruit juice, show some insight. Just because you were introduced by that Hubbard guy doesn’t mean you can slack off here. Friendships are one thing, business is business!”

The waiter quickly complied and soon served fruit juice to the two.

Hongli took a big gulp, the sourness causing her face to wrinkle instantly. After a long while, she managed to say, “What’s the deal?”

“What do you mean?”

“About why the two of us are sitting here again!”

“I was kicked out of the house by my old lady.”

“What a coincidence, same here.”

The two suddenly fell silent. After some time passed, Hei Yang took the initiative to speak: “I feel like our moms are trying to set us up.”

“Be confident, no need to feel that way.”

Hongli glanced at Hei Yang: “They really want to do that. It’s said that last time my dad went out drinking with your dad, as they were drinking, they even thought of names for our future children.”

“How could this be!”

Hei Yang was shocked: “Isn’t the naming right of children supposed to be in the hands of the parents? Shouldn’t they leave us this bit of enjoyment?!”

“Is that the main point?”

“Not really.”

After a few seconds of silent eye contact, Hei Yang and Hongli sighed at the same time.

Hei Yang rubbed his temples: “Because being alone all the time makes me seem very unsociable and isolated.”

Hongli felt a bit of a headache: “But if I were to play with those inward spiraling kings, it would be too much trouble.”

“That’s why I spend all my time with you because at a glance, I see that you and I are the same type of lazy dogs. I feel like there won’t be so many troublesome matters. It’s really not about being a match made in heaven!”

“Well, the two of us are turning 16 soon, and we will indeed have to get married in a few years.”

Hei Yang fell into contemplation: “Instead of living with someone unfamiliar, we might as well be a pair.”

“That’s true. Life is like this after all. If you can’t resist, you have to learn to enjoy it, simply put, acting lazy…”

Hongli sighed: “But in my eyes, you have always been a good brother. Suddenly wanting to have a romantic relationship with your own brother feels too strange.”

“You think it’s strange, don’t you think I feel that way too?”

Hei Yang gave her a look: “But to distort the pure brotherly affection into a dirty romantic relationship, it definitely requires some dirty steps, right?”

“So, does this count as a dirty date for us?”
Hongli posed a very valuable question, making Hei Yang seriously ponder for three seconds, somewhat uncertain: “It should be… right?”

“Let me think…”

With a slight frown, Hongli suddenly reached out her hand, arm resting on the table: “Since it’s a dirty date, I heard that we should do some dirty things, such as, dirty hand-holding!”

“Hiss!”

Hei Yang gasped: “This is too dirty! Morally corrupt!”

That being said, Hei Yang still reached out his hand and held Hongli’s hand.

To be honest, it felt a bit soft, a bit slippery, a bit delicate, a bit forceful…

“Hiss!”

“Smack!”

Hei Yang’s hand was suddenly slammed down on the table by Hongli!

The two of them arm-wrestled for the two thousand and sixth time, ending in Hei Yang’s defeat, with the record updated to one thousand and four wins, one thousand and two losses!

“Can’t you do it?”

Hongli sneered: “Folding after a single wrestle? What level of Body Tempering Realm are you now, have you been lazing around and not training properly recently?”
“Sneak attacks count as skills, right? I didn’t even try hard, otherwise I would have to compensate if this table broke.”

Hei Yang rolled his eyes: “Body Tempering Fifth Level, what’s wrong?”

“Heh, useless!”

“Ah? When did you reach the Sixth Level?”

“I’m also at the Fifth Level.”

“And you still have the nerve to scold me?”

“…”

“To be honest.”

Hongli sighed: “No matter how many levels of Body Tempering, without Qi Refining, we are still ordinary folks.”

“Well, there’s no way around it. This kind of cultivation technique is mostly controlled by the bigshots of those sects or nations.”

Shrugging, Hei Yang said: “Speaking of which, this year our Five-Colored City is having a stroke of luck. Both our Hei Family and your Hong Family were actually granted a disciple quota by the bigshots of the Five Elements Sect. Tsk tsk, the Qing Family, Bai Family, and even the Huang Family must be insanely jealous.”

“It’s all because the seniors of our two families performed well in the sect.”

Hongli said nonchalantly: “These kind of prestigious matters, lazy dogs like us shouldn’t count on them.”

“Indeed.”

Hei Yang agreed with a nod: “But in any case, this quota has nothing to do with me, my cousin from the Hei Family has already reserved it.”

“That’s a coincidence, the quota from our Hong Family has also been reserved by my cousin.”

“…”

“Hey, have you heard?”

Whispering suddenly, Hongli lowered her voice: “I heard that a grand immortal from the Huang Family is temporarily staying in the city, and intends to select a young talent from our five families to take under his wing and teach cultivation techniques!”

“Who doesn’t know about this?”

With an unfazed expression, Hei Yang said: “It’s a widely known matter, no need to be so secretive about it. I heard that this immortal likes to eat chicken. From children to the elderly in the Five-Colored City, everyone has been going out of the city to catch the so-called Spirit Chickens. As a result, the beasts outside the city in the mountains have been getting extra meals lately.”

“So, you’re not going?”

“Well, you’re not going either, right?”

“Because I’m lazy!”


           



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How Can You Become Immortal if You Keep Slacking Off?

How Can You Become Immortal if You Keep Slacking Off?

如此堕怠,怎能成仙
Status: Ongoing Author:
What happens when cultivation progress can be synchronized and bound together? - [Your bound partner breaks through to the Qi Refining Stage, your cultivation level automatically rises to the Qi Refining Stage.] - [Your bound partner achieves mastery in swordsmanship, your swordsmanship level rises to the mastery stage.] - [You complete three cycles of cultivation, your bound partner completes two cycles, and thus both of your cultivation progress increases by five cycles simultaneously.] - [Your bound partner ascends to immortality, and you also become immortal.] The above scenarios are all imaginary! What happens when two slackers are bound together, doubling their laziness? - "You should go and cultivate properly, for the sake of immortality!" - "Pah, why don't you go and cultivate properly!" - [You slacked off for a day, your bound partner slacked off for a day, you... both are utterly hopeless.] How can you become immortal if you keep slacking off!

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