Chapter 209. Xenia’s Side Story
– Clink
Baroness Sauer’s mansion. The meeting of distinguished guests was taking place.
Brian Sauer, the baron, had taken special care, so the maidservants were well-mannered. These carefully selected maids spoke softly and walked gently with their hands folded.
However, the actual participants of the meeting could not find a decent topic after exchanging a few words. They were busy picking at the food placed before them, not so much because they lacked topics to discuss but because they lacked the will to continue the conversation.
Perfectly cooked chuck flap tail of a young lamb.
It was a precious part that yielded only a palm-sized portion even from a whole lamb, but Xenia, bored, soon put down her utensils. She meticulously wiped the lipstick from the corners of her mouth with a napkin and turned her head.
The man who had come as her meeting partner did the same. In silence, Thorton Tatian and Xenia looked around the splendid (yet somewhat vulgar) mansion of Baron Sauer. They shared tea and snacks, and Xenia accepted the escort Thorton ceremoniously offered and stepped outside.
“I had a great time today.”
“I did too.”
Such insincerely brazen goodbyes. Xenia bitterly smiled. Oddly enough, she felt envious, watching Thorton Tatian depart with a lady knight seated beside him in his carriage.
Men have it easy.
If she were to seat her bodyguard knight beside her in the carriage, rumors would spread. Not that anyone appealed to her enough to engage in such irrational actions.
Xenia returned home. When asked by her father how the meeting went, she answered that she would never meet him again.
“How many times has it been? You said no to Gilbert Forte too. Do you think there are better suitors than Thorton Tatian or Gilbert?”
“What can I do if I don’t like them?”
Though she was the one who wanted to sigh, her father sighed. Then, glaring at her, he spoke.
“This time, you cannot refuse. I will set up another meeting. I’ve already spoken with Marquis Benard Tatian.”
“…Who decided that?”
Xenia Peter crossed her arms and argued back. It was not easy for a typical noble lady to contradict the head of the family, but Xenia, who resembled her mother ‘Edlyn Peter,’ was free-spirited.
Speaking of her mother, Edlyn Peter loved the arts. She painted and sang herself.
Her skills were mediocre, but she had an eye for discovering unknown artists with potential. She also sponsored theater groups and provided shelter for minstrels who were now extinct.
Edlyn could indulge in her hobbies because she was the sole heir of the Peter count family. Her husband, Count Gustav Peter, who entered the family as a son-in-law, had no right to criticize her extravagant spending.
Xenia grew up watching such a mother. And she, too, was destined to be like her.
Xenia knew her worth well. As the only daughter of Count Gustav Peter, unless he adopted a son, she would inherit the count title. Additionally, she would inherit her maternal family’s assets, the Monarch barony, in the Conrad Kingdom.
However, her father had no intention of adopting a son. This was closely related to his past, and Xenia was well-aware of it too. Her father was obsessed with pure bloodlines.
So, he wants to tie me to heirs of prestigious families like the Forte and Tatian houses.
Ha!
I understand his intentions.
I heard about how he grew up feeling insecure, born from the estranged relationship between my great-aunt and grandfather (they were half-siblings). Grandfather was an illegitimate child who was beaten and thrown out of the family, so my father, who was barely adopted, developed an obsessive inferiority complex about his bloodline.
However, Xenia found it difficult to empathize with her father’s inferiority complex. She was noble from birth, and her then-young mother had declared that she would not have any more children.
The only daughter and destined lady of the Peter count family. As soon as she was born, she was cleaned with refined milk. The touch of the maids who handled the child was nothing short of meticulous.
Xenia spoke firmly.
“I will choose the man who takes me. And I don’t care if I don’t get married.”
“Here we go again. I cannot allow it. What is a grown lady going to do without getting married? Do you think idling around aimlessly is what a noblewoman does? You need to marry a good family’s man, support him, and contribute to the family.”
“There’s no need to marry. I will become the countess. Even though I am a woman, I am fully capable of leading our family.”
“Then what about an heir?”
“….”
If I say we can adopt, it’ll be a disaster.
Xenia hesitated to provoke her father’s sore spot, and Count Gustav Peter frowned. Soon he announced, “I will reschedule the meeting,” cornering Xenia into a tight spot.
Even if I tell my mother, she can’t do anything about this.
In fact, there was nothing unreasonable about Count Peter’s suggestion. It was natural for a noble lady to marry for the family’s sake, and Xenia’s value was higher because of her unique position as the only daughter.
If the only noble daughter married and bore (usually two) children, those children inherited both the father’s and mother’s families.
However, noble families, which could rise or fall rapidly depending on their conduct, always sought strong alliances, and none were stronger than this. Brothers with the same parents inheriting different families ensured that the bond between the families extended to their grandsons and great-grandsons.
This was the value of a woman like Xenia. Gritting her teeth, she muttered, “I’m so sick of it.”
So what am I?
Is my existence merely for marrying into a family that pleases my father and bearing children (two sons) for a man I don’t love?
No. I can’t do it.
Returning to her room, Xenia made a decision. She told her maid:
“I’ll move to the annex.”
And as soon as the move was complete, she hung a marigold at the door.
Hanging marigolds with contrasting meanings of “sad story” and “inevitable happiness” on the door was a polite way of saying, “Give me time to think, I’ll be out soon.”
Standing in front of the dressing table, Xenia first took off her earrings. Oh, I almost forgot. She instructed the maid to bring water for washing her face, then removed her makeup and looked at herself in the mirror again.
Her upper eyebrows formed a pronounced curve, gradually creating a sharp look in her eyes. Between her eyes, there was a small mole slightly tilted to the left on the bridge of her nose.
Xenia’s heart pounded.
Her bare face, revealed without adornments, seemed unfamiliar, so she moved closer to the mirror. She twitched her soft philtrum, chewed her finely curved lips, and wrinkled her nose. Ah- she tried opening her mouth roughly and then frowning tightly enough to create wrinkles.
This is me.
Taking the opportunity, Xenia took off her long dress. She calmly traced her naked reflection in the mirror, recognizing herself clearly.
Soon, Xenia, who found and wore the cheapest casual clothes, was ready to start her adventure. She climbed over the window of the annex’s first floor, looked around, and hung on the high wall.
– Rustle
Ptu, ptu.
Though sand poured out from the wrongly gripped wall, Xenia laughed. After a couple of tumbles, she got the hang of it and soon stood on top of the wall. A gust of wind blew.
Goodbye.
Looking back at the mansion, she snorted and boldly jumped down… only to change her mind. She clung to the wall, flailed, and fell with a thud, then brushed off the dirt from her clothes, realizing there was no point in doing so.
As she emerged from the alley behind the mansion, a shabby commoners’ world unfolded before Xenia.
People in plain clothes walked by haphazardly, unpaved dirt roads, faces so grimy it was unclear when they last washed… It was completely different from looking down from a carriage.
At eye level, she saw things she hadn’t noticed before, and more importantly, no one paid attention to her.
People passed by nonchalantly.
Xenia felt a strange sense of liberation in their indifference. Without needing to maintain the dignified walk of a noble lady, she lifted her legs high, walked recklessly, and fluttered her skirt.
Wow. I must be a little crazy, she thought, but no one was watching her. Xenia burst into laughter in the middle of the street.
She could be anything. The nobility she was born into was neither something she built nor something she particularly wanted.
Freedom.
At seventeen, a noble young lady blended into the bustling crowd of commoners. She left behind everything given to her, but Xenia didn’t regret it at all.
* * *
“Sorry, but please look elsewhere. Our shop can’t afford to hire someone who’s never worked before.”
But the world wasn’t that accommodating. On the second day of searching for a job, Xenia was in trouble.
She didn’t know how to do anything.
The handful of silver coins she had taken from home was all she had, and she had already spent it all on lodging. If she had found cheaper accommodation, she could have lasted a few more days, but her high standards led her to seek a pretty good place, thinking she’d manage somehow.
What should I do?
But still, Xenia’s actions were filled with composure.
Baseless confidence.
Even though she had no intention of returning to the count’s estate, she laughed off the immediate reality. Despite the dire situation that might force her into homelessness, it all felt quite amusing.
Ha ha ha. How far do I intend to fall? How far can I fall?
Not that she was foolish enough to willingly plunge herself into the gutter. Xenia pondered and soon came up with something she could do.
Theater.
She had followed her mother to the ‘Arille Theatre’ frequently, and she thought she could manage that.
As a noble accustomed to donning the necessary masks per occasion, she did not consider acting particularly difficult, and being well-versed in etiquette, she held the potential to become a truly rare actress.
Etiquette is the domain of the nobility. However, there were a few commoners who also learned etiquette.
Notably, professions like butlers or stewards required mastery of etiquette, and maids attending to nobles received at least minimal training. Though slightly different, knights also maintained decorum that befitted their dignity.
These were all professions that involved contact with the nobility. Yet, there was one more profession where adopting etiquette was beneficial — acting.
This was because many characters appearing in plays were nobles or royalty. Therefore, actors who aspired to lead roles would invest extra time and money in learning etiquette.
In this sense, Xenia was a prepared lead actress. Etiquette was second nature to her, and playing a noble role would not require acting.
Okay!
Indeed, no one dies so easily. With this thought, Xenia headed straight to the Arille Theatre.
She wasn’t worried about being recognized because nobles seldom visited theaters meant for commoners. Maybe her mother, who sponsored the theater, might show up? It was fine if her mother caught her.
If her mother saw her as an actress, she would laugh her heart out. Her mother was completely different from her father, who, fearing rumors of a marriageable maiden leaving home, had refrained from putting out a wanted notice.
However, Xenia would soon realize how greatly she misunderstood her situation.
Although she managed to become an actress at the Arille Theatre right away, the roles she received were of inanimate objects like trees or rocks, or non-speaking roles like Maid 7. There was no room to showcase her talents, and acting proved not as simple as she had thought.
It was an art of carefully chosen actions to elicit audience reactions.
Gradually, Xenia became fascinated by the charm of acting. She poured her heart into even playing a minor minion of the Demon King, flailing under a black cape. After half a year of hard work, she got her break.
“Nice to meet you. I am Bretin. I came because…”
The theater owner of the newly established Orange Theatre, which had been around for less than a decade, approached her, enticing her with the promise of a good role.
It was not a bad offer at all.
The historic Arille Theatre had too many people coming to perform plays. With many already having snagged the lead roles, it was difficult for Xenia to avoid being cast as an extra, so she moved to the Orange Theatre. There, she blossomed with her talents.
However, the Orange Theatre was a peculiar place. It was once a brothel, and former prostitutes still lived on the third floor of the theatre.
Of course, this didn’t bother Xenia much.
They were all the same commoners.
Regardless of what they had done in the past, they were all lowly commoners. To Xenia, the person themselves was more important than their past or background, so she lived, laughed, and shared help with them.
Could I just live like this now?
Xenia, whose life was getting on track, no longer had any ambitions. She was an actress who could become anything and made a decent living from it. Feeling a certain emptiness, she still came out for her morning exercise like a diligent squirrel, simply wishing to continue living as she was.
Perhaps it was the rare cool weather of a hot summer that pleased her?
Xenia ran further than usual, all the way to the north gate. However, on her way back, she tripped, and down she went!
She had collided with a boy who was walking, seemingly oblivious, while staring intently at a small water cup. The water, filled to the brim, spilled all over Xenia.
The boy, upon realizing what had happened, said,
“I-I’m sorry.”
He reached out his hand and, as the victim raised her head, he stared blankly at her. Still holding her hand, he suddenly confessed.
“I think I love you.”
“What?”
“So please help me.”
Now that she looked at him, he was a complete mess. No, this boy-like young man was clearly a beggar.
But he looked at her with burning eyes, and Xenia, who was about to laugh, suppressed her laughter. This man was sincerely confessing his love to her.
Her heart pounded at his unwavering gaze and the beggar boy’s confidence. She liked him as a person, but even the fact that he was a beggar felt like destiny.
What would happen if I accept? How low can I fall?
Her rebellion against her father pushed her like a gust of wind. The small sprout of affection caught the wind and spread like wildfire, and Xenia replied that she would help him.
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