73. The first few seconds of what would later be called
Violette was so immersed in her thoughts that she didn’t realize someone was approaching. It was only when the the crunching sound of stepping on fallen leaves reached her ears did she realized that someone was approaching.
Violette turned around in a hurry at the sound in surprise. She thought to herself, “I can’t believe someone would come to a place like this”.
The only thing that surprised her after she recognized the person wasn’t that someone was here, but the fact that she was here.
Today, as always, she appeared with her lovely and dainty appearance. Her beautiful pink hair was flowing beautifully down her elongated back. Her straight, undistorted hair was enviable to Violette. Her large purple eyes were round and open in surprise, giving a different impression from the one she usually gives standing in the center of the crowd with a smile on her face.
She was smiling, but not smiling at the same time. The face of a person who has put on a smile but doesn’t know what to do with the current situation. Impatience, confusion, and all kinds of complex emotions could be seen in her face. Violette could feel it because she also had moments like this, where she wanted to hide but got caught by someone unexpected.
Rosette was holding something to her chest. Seeing Violette, she pushed the thing deeper in her chest, as if afraid she(Violette) would see it. Her gaze wandering and she mumbled while looking sideways.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t know you were here. I’m leaving then.”
“No, it’s okay. You can use this place if you want.”
Violette was already used to people not interacting with her. It never hurt her, neither did it make her sad or want to fight against it. Because she had experienced of being neglected and unnoticed beforehand.
Violette stood up and tried to walk past Rosette, her feet stepping on the fallen leaves.
She was about to pass by Rosette when suddenly her foot landed on a stone and she lost her balance.
Rosette stretched her arms to catch Violette. It was done totally on instincts. As soon as she caught Violette, the book she was holding fell on the ground with a thud.
“Oh no ……!”(Violette)
“It’s okay. ……”(Rosette)
They immediately tried to pick it up, their hands colliding in mid-air. Violette stopped her action while Rosette also did the same. Both of them looked down, and in their line of sight, the pages of the open book was swaying a little in the gentle breeze.
When Rosette was holding the book, Violette couldn’t tell what it was about because of the book cover. She thought it was a novel or something, but there were many colorful pictures on the opened pages. But it was not a picture book of any kind.
Rosette’s shoulders flinched as she was sorting through the information that she had been caught. The fact that her fingertips seem to be trembling slightly as she remained frozen in a position with her hands stretched out on the ground was probably not due to the difficulty of the position she was in but because she knew she had been caught doing something she shouldn’t have.
On the opened page, there were many pictures and detailed words. Violette thought it was similar like the books that were prepared for her when she was a child. When Violette was not yet Violette, a girl, but was growing up as a boy.
That was why it was so unexpected that Rosette had something like that. It was not only the fact that she had a picture book, but above all, its contents.
The impression many people would surely have of her would be the sight of her turning pages among a brightly decorated place with beautiful flowers. Violette had a similar impression when she was looking at Rosette from afar.
Instead of Rosette, who had hardened like a statue, it was Violette who picked up the fallen book and dusted off the sand on it. The book cover was stained, but not particularly scratched. She checked the book a little but there were no tears on the pages.
“Here you go.”
“Ah ……, yes …….”
Rosette took the book offered to her with awkward movements and held it to her chest just as she had done when she first came here.
“Well, this …….”
Rosette wanted to make an excuse, but she couldn’t find the right words. She couldn’t tell Violette why she was carrying such a book. So she could only keep her mouth shut.
The reason why Violette could understand her(Rosette) inner feelings so clearly is not only because Rosette is so easy to understand.
Violette herself had experienced a similar situation. That was why it was easy to imagine what kind of state Rosette was in, what she wanted to say, and what she was worried about.
“If you don’t want to explain, that’s fine. I won’t ask you or tell anyone anything.”
“If you want me to forget about it, I will. You didn’t want …… me to know, did you?”
The reason why Rosette looked so uncomfortable when she was confronted was not because Violette was there. The very fact that there was a person, made her surprised and awkward. And since the other party was Violette, who she has few good things to say about,……, it may well be that Violette was the cause of her awkwardness.
(You stopped me when you realized I had misunderstood you.)(Rosette)
Rosette just wanted a quiet place to read but she never thought this would result her secret being exposed. It was no one’s fault, not Rosette’s, not even Violette’s. It was just an accident, and there was no one to blame.
But that doesn’t comfort Rosette’s heart, though.
“Thank you, Violette,” she said. I’m sorry, if I made you feel uncomfortable.”
Whatever the case may be, Violette has no interest in blowing the whistle on other people’s secrets. To put it roughly, she was not interested in it. It is not proper to have no trust in a relationship, be it friends or mere acquaintances. But she couldn’t also give her(Rosette) a tangible guarantee, so she(Violette) had to ask her(Rosette) to trust her(Violette) on this one.
“Are you disgusted……?
“Why would I……?”
“Because I’m ……”
“It’s true that what you are reading…… may be unusual, but…”
The book that Rosette was carrying was an encyclopedia book of reptiles, which was not considered a favorite species in this school. There were many people who love flowers and nature, but the insects and reptiles that always accompany them are not accepted. So, even though this school has a lot of nature, such creatures are rarely seen. They may be introduced to the students, but it is unlikely that someone will breed them on the school grounds.
It is a fact that they are assumed to be harmful, and everyone also believe it, regardless of gender or age.
“Whatever you are attracted to, it is your choice.”
Someone’s liking could be someone’s disliking, and someone’s disliking could be someone’s liking. There is no rule anywhere that says you can only like what is acceptable to all. Only you have the right to choose, and whatever you like or dislike, you can make it unique by choosing to like it.
If someone doesn’t want anyone to know about their liking, they can hide it, but they don’t have to convert their liking to disliking just for people’s acceptance.
Well, if you don’t like something, you really don’t like it, you just have to be careful where and with whom you choose to be.
Freedom of taste and concern for those around you are two different things.
Forcing likes and forcing dislikes are both annoying if they cross the line. It is no longer freedom, but an infringement.
Violette did not understand this in the past. Therefore, she forced and coerced everyone to like her, and in the end, Violette herself was disliked by everyone.
It felt like a long time ago, but she could still remember the feeling of the murderous intent that she held that day, the day she tried to kill her half-sister in her previous life.
“Then, have a nice day.”
Violette bowed lightly and walked past Rosette, without ever looking back. The mere passing encounter was quickly relegated to the corner of her mind, and there was no surprise anymore that she had to clear from her mind.
It was just a little bit of a chance encounter, just a little bit of a darkening of her name.
T/N: Hello everyone! Sorry for the late update. I’ve been very busy lately and because of this, from now on, I will post only one chapter per week. But I may post extra chapters if my mood suffice. I’m sorry for changing the schedule so suddenly but my busy schedule left me no choice.
73. The first few seconds of what would later be called inevitable
73. The first few seconds of what would later be called