Morphine was discovered in the early 1800s.
Well, since morphine is a type of opium, you can vaguely think it came out around that time without having to research historical backgrounds. Moreover, morphine frequently appeared as a painkiller for soldiers in works set during World War I.
As the strongest painkiller extracted from natural plants, morphine’s effect is powerful, and it acts on the brain very quickly. That’s why it was sprayed like crazy on soldiers until World War II.
However, it also became a cause for the soldiers who survived World War I and II to suffer tremendously. After all, it’s a famous type of “opium.”
Its addictive nature is very strong, even in modern times, where it’s used as a narcotic painkiller when no other pain relief works.
Back in the day, they focused only on the drug’s effects with relatively little research on side effects. Plus, there weren’t really any substitutes available.
And I had that morphine stashed away in my room.
“……What is this?”
“……”
That’s right. Just because it was the past doesn’t mean they weren’t aware of the harmful effects of opium. I mean, didn’t the British fervently sell opium to China, which led to the famous Opium War when China opposed it thinking it was ruining their country?
In this world, it wasn’t used without understanding its effects. They used it knowing what it was.
And now, I was revealing the whereabouts of the morphine I’d hoarded away, all because of Alice rummaging around my room.
“Crown Princess.”
“……No way, right?”
Alice asked, looking at the morphine on the bed.
It wasn’t a lot. I didn’t even need much—a quantity enough for just one or two uses was sufficient. Maybe three small vials as a backup.
But it was enough to raise Alice’s suspicions.
“Hmm? It’s not an addiction or anything, right?”
“……Crown Princess.”
I calmly called out to Alice, who looked extremely anxious.
“Have I ever shown symptoms of opium addiction?”
“……”
One of the clear physical symptoms of morphine use is small pupils. I’d seen that several times before—years ago in the Count’s Territory.
And if I were really addicted to morphine, it would have been impossible to hide it. When you’re high on opium, you can’t think straight and you’re practically out of your mind, not to mention the withdrawal symptoms like visible vomiting, fever, and diarrhea.
But my body was perfectly fine. When busy, it’s natural to experience withdrawal symptoms, but I had never shown such signs. Strangely, I hadn’t even caught a mild cold.
“Then why do you have this?”
Alice glared at me while asking.
“For emergencies.”
“……But there are wizards in the castle.”
That’s right. This world exists where magic is real. There are magicians who can heal injuries almost without leaving a scar and have even succeeded in reattaching severed limbs recently.
“It takes too long for magic to heal the body.”
“Then what if…”
“And unhealed bodies feel pain, making you dull.”
No matter how trained a person is, it’s impossible to move exactly the same pre-injury and post-injury. So in case of urgent need, it was essential to trick the brain to mask the pain allowing faster movements.
…Honestly, I felt a bit wronged. I had never truly used it yet.
But when the time comes, I planned to use it, experience the situation, and then rewind time to apply that knowledge for a new attempt.
Dependence on drugs does have psychological reasons, but the biggest reason is the physical effects. The damage to the brain and nervous system is particularly severe. When addicted to drugs, seeking them out is vastly different from simply “looking for food” due to boredom. It’s more like a desperate search for food by a starving person, as the brain believes it’s hungry.
But I could override that addiction of my brain and nervous system.
So if there’s a dangerous possibility that I won’t know even after suffering a serious injury, I can endure as much as possible, see into the future, and then apply that idea for a new challenge—of course, without drugs in the final state.
“……”
Alice bit her lip.
“Is it because of me?”
“……”
Um….
It’s not just “because of Alice.” To be exact, it was just my preparation after thinking through all situations. You never know when you might really have to assassinate the Emperor.
The Emperor is among the strongest beings in this world. Even Lucas can’t win him in a sword fight, so he’s likely much more powerful than anyone known as the “Sword Saint” in this world.
Yet, as a human, there might still be a tiny gap.
But that gap could be so small that you might need thousands of repeated actions in a matter of seconds to find and exploit it.
So, these vials of morphine were meant to add a bit of efficiency to that process.
Seeing me silent, Alice seemed to think something, then reached for my collar.
Alice… actually had a significant edge in talent over me. Simply put, she’s “that” Emperor’s daughter. Her physical abilities are top-notch, and she’s incredibly intelligent. Honestly, if I hadn’t rewinded time, I could never defeat Alice in a one-on-one confrontation.
Additionally, there’s her study habits. Even if she’d read the same books dozens or hundreds of times and attended private tutor lectures for hundreds of hours, she could invest the same amount of time as others… No, if she set her mind to it, she could wipe the slate clean and just absorb knowledge. If I hadn’t been able to turn back time, I wouldn’t even have gotten into the academy.
To begin with, I likely wouldn’t have survived this long.
So, um.
If she suddenly grabbed me like this, there’s no escaping. My face would inevitably end up just an arm’s length away from Alice’s.
…Should I rewind time?
I thought about it briefly but decided to postpone it. Let’s see how the situation plays out first.
After all, Alice is one of my favorite characters.
If possible, I didn’t want to rewind the time we spent together.
“Hey.”
Oh.
This is bad.
Alice looked genuinely angry.
“From now on, I’m going to ask you questions, so answer me honestly.”
“……”
The fact that my expression didn’t crumble was truly fortunate. It seems my daily practice really paid off.
“What do you think of me, and what do you think about yourself?”
“The Crown Princess is someone destined to become the Emperor of the Empire. My role is to assist with that.”
“Just as my father commanded?”
“……”
No, this was my will.
If Alice weren’t here, I would have run away as soon as possible. Ideally, I would have sought help near Claire… or somewhere with the heroine or the male protagonist, and maybe even, despite reluctance, some male character would help me hide. Except the Papal State.
I wasn’t sure what Alice thought about my silence, but she stared at me with fiery eyes and spoke.
“Let me rephrase. What would you do if my father named you Crown Princess instead of me?”
“Such a thing would never—”
“If you think father wouldn’t do something like that, then you’re making a huge mistake.”
…Hmm.
I thought Alice was the one mistaken, but this wasn’t the right situation to say that.
“If that happens, I would do my best to ensure that the imperial authority transitions to the rightful position.”
“……Even if it’s your father’s order?”
“Yes. Because it is the right thing to do.”
This was sincere.
I had no intention of becoming Emperor at all. Honestly, considering the story so far, there’s a question of whether the Emperor can continue the imperial authority. Because… doesn’t that seem right? The Emperor is the head of the evil empire.
In the end, the one who wins in the end would be the protagonist, along with the heroine who helps them and other male comrades. And many other supporters as well.
Although the conclusion is not yet determined, most players speculate that the ending might be a people’s revolution.
Even if Alice can’t continue as Emperor, she could become a hero of the masses. And that would likely be much better for Alice’s future. No matter how much it draws from reality, in the end, it’s still a game. Considering the developers, it’s unlikely that the royal family would all face execution.
“Would you risk destroying your own body for that?”
Alice’s gaze shifted to the morphine vial on the bed.
I nodded.
“Yes, that’s right.”
Of course, I didn’t plan to use it till the end, but if I answered plainly, there wouldn’t be a reason for gathering morphine in the first place, so I used it as an excuse.
“……”
Alice glared at me for a while before releasing her grip on my collar. I tried my best not to stumble. I can’t believe nearly a decade of effort paid off, managing not to look ridiculous.
“I’ll take this with me.”
“……”
Alice picked up the morphine from the bed.
Then she looked at me and said,
“Don’t worry. I won’t have any use for it. A ‘Crown Princess’ can’t be addicted to morphine, can she?”
And that comment about being a ‘Crown Princess’ also felt directed at me.
“……”
“And I will make sure no one can obtain such substances within the Imperial Palace. From now on, only those who can determine the necessity of these items will have access. Not someone as dignified as a Crown Princess. Got it?”
“……Understood.”
It was only after I said that did Alice nod with a stiff expression. Then she turned and left my room.
“……”
After about thirty seconds of silence,
“Phew……”
I let out a long breath.
No wonder she’s the Emperor’s daughter; her vigor is no joke. I thought I was going to crumble under her grip.
Fortunately, I succeeded in managing my expression, so I didn’t need to rewind time.
Just a moment ago, when I followed Alice, the Emperor was already gone. Even if I had met him directly, I wasn’t sure if the situation would be resolved, but it seemed I had genuinely aggravated Alice’s temper.
With a huff, Alice returned to my room, having been unable to hold back her emotions, and threw my bag open.
In an instant, I wondered what she was doing when she started pulling everything out of the bag.
Of course, she wasn’t throwing my stuff around, but it looked like she wanted to leave it in the state “before the bag was packed.”
I was so baffled watching her that when Alice discovered a bottle of morphine in the bag, all hell broke loose.
“……Hmm.”
To be honest, even if Alice was determined to expose me for having morphine, I could easily acquire it if I wished. There are opium dens in the corners of this world. Of course, it’s illegal, but the Empire doesn’t care much about the hardships of the lower classes.
Thanks to that, opium is somewhat popular among the nobility too. Naturally, nobles are far harder to catch than commoners. Counts lived their debauchery openly until they were assassinated.
……Still, bringing morphine back into the palace would be risky.
If Alice catches me again, this time I might truly be suspected of being an addict and forced into a sanctuary for rehabilitation. Mental hospitals in this era are, um… rather barbaric, aren’t they? I really don’t want to end up in one.
“Hmm…”
If not morphine…
Let’s see, there are a few medicinal items that come to mind. Even if they aren’t painkillers, there could be substances that could drastically increase my odds in assassination.
For example, yes, in this era, there are some substances recently released whose harmful effects and side effects haven’t been fully unearthed yet.
Drugs that, when consumed, exponentially heighten concentration, allowing normal tasks to be completed at double speed and with much greater accuracy. It’s no magical potion. It was a drug that exists even in our reality.
Methamphetamine.
In reality, it was sometimes distributed openly as a general medicine.
The product’s pharmaceutical company was a Japanese company, and they sometimes referred to it by its Japanese phonetic, “Hiropon.”
Of course, like any drug, it can seriously deteriorate the human body. They say it permanently damages dopamine receptors, and dopamine is what creates positive feelings in humans. So, once taken, it means you can never feel regular joy again, unless you stop using drugs.
But I could rewind time and fix it, though.
“……Should I just give up?”
While morphine might be usable for ‘exploration of potential’, methamphetamine is thoroughly a ‘result-oriented’ drug. The outcomes I gain from that drug would be unusable.
Even if I succeeded in an assassination while on that drug, I’d end up living as a lifelong drug addict, unable to feel pleasure except through drugs, or ultimately have to rewind time to derive results again anyway.
There really isn’t an easy choice.
I let out another long sigh.
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