Chapter 215
For a moment, it felt like time had stopped. If I couldn’t even hear the sniffling, I might have thought it actually did.
‘What in the world…’
This is insane! Am I also drunk? Did I suddenly go deaf from booze? I just couldn’t believe what I was hearing.
The Second Manager. Of all people, it was the Second Manager confessing to me! I didn’t even know how to process it. I had already lost my mind after the previous three confessions, but the Second Manager was on a whole different level.
After two years of dealing with all kinds of events, I’d developed a bond with the Second Manager, one that felt more like family than anything romantic. At least, that’s what I thought.
‘Only I thought that, huh?’
I guess I considered us something like family. No, the Second Manager probably saw me as family too. The problem is that instead of siblings, we’re looking at a married couple (planned).
I instinctively wanted to sigh but quickly bit my lip. Sighing now would tear the Second Manager’s mental state to shreds.
‘I’m already shredded, though.’
Suddenly, I felt a wave of injustice wash over me. Honestly, I felt like I was losing my mind too. Do I really need to take care of someone else’s psyche in this state?
Of course, I do. No matter how absurd or temperamental they might be, the Second Manager is still my subordinate. When I first became the Executive Manager and the Inspection Department was in chaos, they were one of the few who supported me right from the start.
Suppressing my confusing emotions, I looked at the Second Manager. She was silently shedding tears, trying to hold back her sobs. Just looking up at me with those tear-filled eyes was pitiful.
Not saying anything was even scarier. I almost hoped she’d yell like she did earlier.
“Um, I’m Erich… I’m Erich! Not Second Manager, just Erich!”
Hearing her voice filled with so much longing made me feel bittersweet, yet I could finally understand the longing she harbored.
Yeah, names matter. How sad and heartbreaking must it be for the man she loves not to call her by her name?
I never imagined I’d be that loving guy, but I suppose I am the source of this situation.
‘Didn’t see this coming.’
A small habit turned into a major disaster. At least I should have used names in private spaces.
Letting out a sigh—this has happened so many times now—I whipped out a handkerchief from my pocket. Her makeup was all smudged up; it was a huge mess.
I gently reached out to wipe her face, and for a moment, a flicker of hope appeared in her eyes.
“I’m sorry.”
For the heart she must have held onto for two years just because of a name, I apologized for not knowing until the drink caused her to burst.
But it seemed the Second Manager took my apology the wrong way because that flicker of hope quickly transformed into despair.
“Ah… ahh…”
The moment I cleaned her up, the tears began to flow once again.
“B-boss!”
“Hey, don’t move suddenly!”
The Second Manager, trembling, quickly stood up but stumbled and fell. She’d lost her strength from sitting too long and was likely drunk, making it hard to balance.
Plus, it was too abrupt for me to catch her in time.
“…You okay?”
Seeing the Second Manager sprawled out on the ground groaning made me sigh. Why does she keep showing such pitiful sides?
But the Second Manager paid no mind to my concerns, still clutching at my clothes with trembling hands, gazing at me earnestly.
“I-I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry, I’m so sorry… I was wrong…”
The Second Manager kept repeating apologies, gripping my clothes tighter as if afraid I’d leave her forever.
She was definitely misunderstanding something. She seemed to have taken my apologies the wrong way.
Yet, her repeated apologies rendered me momentarily speechless. I needed to clarify things, but I missed the timing.
“I’m sorry for messing around, sorry for not listening, I’m sorry for acting strange… I’m sorry…!”
In the silence, the Second Manager, increasingly panicked, began to ramble incoherently, making it impossible to catch her meaning.
“I-I messed up! I thought you’d like me more for acting like family, so I did all that just to catch your attention…!”
Even as she spoke amid growing emotions, she mixed in cries and sniffs.
Certainly, her antics made her more eye-catching, whether she intended them to be or not.
At least right now, it felt like I wasn’t providing the connection that the Second Manager expected.
“I promise I’ll listen from now on. I won’t mess around, won’t overstep my bounds…!”
As the Second Manager went on, my mouth stubbornly refused to open.
This was a first. Seeing her so desperate and heartbreaking was a shock. Even when she was tense, the Second Manager usually managed to keep a casual grin—the type that made her seem untouchable at times.
“So please, just once, just this once, give me a chance…”
One hand that had been clutching my clothes reached up in hope. Then, her trembling finger extended as she smiled a grin that looked like it might shatter if touched.
“I-I swear, just once more! I’ll listen! I’ll follow all your orders, if you say be quiet, I’ll be quiet…”
“Second Manager.”
Finally, my mouth had to open, but I ended up calling her the title I had used for two years.
“Really! I promise! I’ll impress you so much, you’ll be shocked! Just… just…”
As a result, the Second Manager’s previously strained smile crumbled in an instant. The expression that now crossed her face was oddly familiar. Where had I seen that before?
Ah, it was the face of a child searching for their mother in the orphanage. The realization of being abandoned, knowing they’d never be seen again, yet desperately seeking her out.
‘Damn.’
Why am I seeing that expression here again?
“Whatever number it is, just don’t tell me you’re sorry or that you don’t like me…”
The Second Manager mumbled, burying her head low, shoulders trembling.
Then, the sound of her sobbing filled the air. A child’s cry echoed; perhaps it was more than she could bear.
“…Erich.”
I said, draping my coat over her back.
This time, thankfully, I could say her name. If I had called her the Second Manager again, one of us would be dead.
At my call, she quickly lifted her head.
“Can we talk for a bit?”
Let’s clear up this weird misunderstanding first.
It had been a habit to address bureaucrats by their titles. I had a jinx about it that I couldn’t shake.
After sending those guys from the Northern Region and dealing with Hecate leaving my side, I started to hesitate to call bureaucrats by their names. Especially since everyone I had gotten close to was gone.
So since then, I would refer to everyone by their titles. In public or private, whether I was familiar or meeting someone new, titles were the way to go.
Yeah, that had to be it. But now—
“Not anymore.”
Now, it could be confidently said that the jinx was effectively over. It’s just a habit at this point.
And the fear of calling them by name? I’m not a grim reaper or anything; it’s an exhausting jinx to keep up!
‘If I really was dead, I’d be calling the Crown Prince’s name all the time.’
Gilbert, Gilbert, Gilbert, Gilbert. Our little bastard, Gilbert. I could shout that name thirty times a day.
“But, Boss, calling everyone by their title…”
“That’s just a habit now.”
Despite how unexpectedly resistant my mental state was feeling, the jinx seemed to fade quickly.
Especially after dropping my guard with Marghetta; I could easily say it was practically gone. It’s said some habits last a lifetime, but two years isn’t a whole lot.
Still, I stubbornly used titles because it felt comfortable and easy.
“You never had anyone to call by name anyway.”
Right after the war, when I first became the Executive Manager, there were no bureaucrats nearby that I could name.
The Minister? Who’s going to address their supervisor, who’s likely older than their own father, by their name?
What about other department heads? Those folks were all way older than me. We were never close enough to call each other by name.
Other bureaucrats? No way. If I, the Executive Manager, called them by name, they’d be like, “Why’s that jerk calling me by name?” Just like a kid caught by parents on report card day.
“Then, why are we…”
Looking at the Second Manager whose eyes were still glistening with unshed tears, I scratched my head. No deep reason behind it, just the familiarity of using titles felt right.
Erich has five letters, Lafayette has four. On the other hand, Second and First Managers are just three letters. Plus, isn’t it a bit awkward for a superior to call someone by their name?
I mean, I get uneasy when the minister casually says, “Hey, you little punk Gilbert.”
“I’m sorry. I should have called you by name earlier.”
“…”
My heartfelt apology was met with silence from the Second Manager.
Since I understood her feelings, I waited in stillness. Imagining her mistaking my apology as rejection, she must have felt like fleeing.
But after a few half-hearted nods, she finally turned her gaze back to me.
“So, um, I’m not rejected just yet, right…?”
“Right.”
At those words, the Second Manager burst into tears again.
I could lose my mind.
*
I awoke, head pounding.
Then the glorious memories of last night washed over me like a storm.
“I-I’m Erich… I’m Erich! Not just Second Manager!”
Ah.
“Do you know how heartbreaking it is not to be called by name by the man I love?”
Ahh…
“J-just one more chance! I promise I’ll listen, do as you say. If you say to be quiet, I’ll be quiet…”
Aahhhh…
“Whatever number, just don’t say you’re sorry or that you hate me…”
Aahhhhh!
‘Crazy!’
I couldn’t handle the waves of memories shaking me to my core.
This is madness. I completely lost my mind because of alcohol, saying things I should never say and things I should keep bottled up forever.
“I can’t give you an answer right away; I haven’t even responded to the first confession!”
Then the memory of the Executive Manager’s words struck me, freezing me in place.
“Yeah, I was messing around, not listening, doing weird things, but—”
“Huh…”
“Still, we’ve developed quite the bond over these years. I’ll seriously consider it.”
That day, I felt the comforting pat of the Executive Manager on my shoulder.
‘Seriously…’
I felt a grin tug at my lips. The Executive Manager was actually considering our relationship seriously. They were taking my confession seriously.
Well, the outcome is obvious. The Executive Manager would never reject a perfect woman like me, would they?
“Whatever the number, please don’t tell me no or that you’re sorry…”
Just as I was about to brim with confidence, the memories of my antics flooded back, and I squirmed back into bed.
It’s over. My confidence and dignity as a woman shattered that day. From now on, I’d have to dwell in the shadows in front of the Executive Manager.
As I kicked off the covers, ready to start a bright day, my communicator lit up.
“…Who is it?”
Thinking for a moment it might be the Executive Manager, I picked up the call with trembling hands.
– It’s me.
Sadly, it turned out to be my senior instead of the Executive Manager.
Well, this is perfect timing. I need to tell my senior about my successful confession.
…Though the murderous look in their eyes is a bit scary, I owe them a lot, so it’s worth it.
“Senior! I just wanted to tell you something.”
– Your last words? Those should be said to your family, not me.
“I confessed to the Executive Manager!”
Upon that statement, my senior’s eyes widened.
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