Chapter 46
Time Remaining Until the First Class: 7 Days.
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About 30 minutes later, the Red Tower Wizard entered only after giving three polite knocks and twice repeating a warning to refrain from any excessive displays of affection if they were still happening.
And the moment she stepped in, the first thing she did was drop a thick Academy Rule Book onto the table with a Thud.
“Such things are prohibited in the Academy!”
“Prohibited, huh?”
“Yes, it’s prohibited. There have been three instances of regional wars caused by reckless ‘this and that’. The number of minor disputes is too many to count.”
“Why would someone who knows that engage in— such things?!”
BANG BANG BANG! The Red Tower Wizard pounded the table in anger. I responded with a genuinely puzzled expression. Beside me, Pink-Haired Lesbian raised her glasses with a neutral look.
“What did you think we were doing?”
At that, the Red Tower Wizard’s voice shrank to a crawling ant level, and her stuttering rate shot up to the ‘Tower Master talking to strangers’ level.
“S-S-So… I-I mean, w-what is SM… play?”
“What exactly does SM play entail?”
“Well, uh, hitting with a whip or…”
“Sorry to let you down, but we weren’t exactly engaging in SM play. We were simply, in a purely innocent sense, hurting each other’s dignity.”
“I wasn’t expecting it in the first place, and isn’t that even worse than SM?!”
It’s customary among friends to take the chance to tease each other. You see a window, you take it, you know? Does the Red Tower Wizard not understand this obvious fact? Maybe she just doesn’t have any friends.
“Your perception is weird!”
“Then what do you consider a friend?”
“Relying on and leading each other. If I stagger, they catch me; if I’m sad, they comfort me; they help me find meaning in life, and eventually, we promise to leave the village together—”
The Red Tower Wizard’s expression turned dreamy. I couldn’t tell who she was reminiscing about, but it was definitely the face of a princess waiting for her prince charming. It felt less like a fantasy and more like a personal story.
I left an honest review.
“Sounds like you’re looking for a lover, not a friend.”
“…I’m talking about friends?!”
Looking into her eyes, I could swear she was 120% head over heels for someone. Whoever it was, he must’ve been some fairy-tale protagonist.
“By the way, how did you get into the Academy? They don’t usually let outsiders in…”
“Don’t you know? I’m a professor, that’s why.”
“Please, make your lies more believable. What kind of skills do you even have?”
The Red Tower Wizard snorted in laughter. I felt a bit unfairly treated. She was right there when I was bickering with the Pink-Haired Lesbian. She saw me achieve the 3-Star level, and now she was throwing shade at me?
“If you entered as a student, that would make sense. But the professors in this Academy, except for the support courses like herbal studies, have all reached the Metamorphosis Realm. Plus, they must have a specialty or reputation significant enough to win a tenure position.”
“Hmm.”
“For example, Professor Alexon, who teaches All Things About Close Combat, has roamed the harsh battlefields of the continent for 40 years, authored five military strategy books, and was seen as the next Mercenary King before retirement.”
I see. Had it not been for a battle of words, I might’ve been cut in half.
“And what about Professor Alejandro? His Alejandro Spiral Stone Tower is the first spell mentioned when the strongest defensive magic is debated. Outsiders might underestimate it as just maintaining the training grounds, but the fact that so many Academy personnel can practice and duel without the training grounds losing shape is—”
I see. Had it not been for a surprise attack, I would’ve been in danger.
As I listened to the Red Tower Wizard drone on with unsolicited trivia, I remembered a famous saying: You’re really garbage.
What did it matter whether it was an ambush, a verbal duel, a game of Go, or Othello? I won! Regardless of how strong or powerful they were, as long as they didn’t challenge me again, it was all good. I could maintain a perfect record of 1 win and 0 losses forever.
I casually cut through the Red Tower Wizard’s monologue and asked, “Isn’t there still some time left until school starts?”
“I came early. How could someone arrive right on time? If I run into bandits on the way, I could be delayed by a day or two. Typically, everyone starts showing up around now.”
“Then you’ve got nothing to do?”
“Huh?”
“Give me a tour of the Academy.”
Since it seemed she knew quite a bit about the place, I decided to hire her as my guide.
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Of course, touring the Academy facilities leisurely with the Pink-Haired Lesbian wouldn’t have made much difference. However, the reason I persuaded the Red Tower Wizard to be my guide was that I needed to understand things from a student’s perspective.
It was a demand survey.
I had deliberated a lot about what elective subject to teach. Honestly, I was still in the depths of thought. If Academy life was as rigid as military life and a mental break was necessary, I thought about creating a support course called “Healing in a Peaceful Otherworld.”
Or perhaps something like “Learning Social Etiquette While Cuddled by Handsome Butlers / Beautiful Maids.” Pink-Haired Lesbian was all on board, eagerly mentioning she had a preference for slender types.
Since she was sent by the Second Prince, it was likely that Pink-Haired Lesbian did see this as a matter of dimensional travel rather than illusion magic. That meant she was excited about the idea of mingling with girls from another dimension without any consequences. What a weirdo.
The Academy grounds were quite extensive. With teleportation magic circles installed in each section to facilitate movement, it wouldn’t be an exaggeration to call it a city.
The Red Tower Wizard made such a fuss asking, “Why do I have to be your guide?!” But as soon as the tour began, she was the one who eagerly led the way.
The first facility she introduced was the training ground.
“This is the training ground.”
“There are already quite a few folks swinging swords. Isn’t the semester supposed to start yet?”
A wide open area was filled with scarecrows and stones presumably for strength training. And there were students frantically swinging swords or doing squats, so much that I could almost smell the sweat from just looking at it.
“How on earth do they live so healthily?” I mused in awe as I watched them, just then the Red Tower Wizard added:
“Even if the semester hasn’t started, self-improvement is the foundation of an Academy student’s life! There are no lazy students or schemers here!”
“But don’t they need a break sometimes? Just running around has got to tire them out.”
“Don’t underestimate Academy students. Just looking at themselves getting stronger day by day is enough to lead a fulfilling life! I’m sure the other students think that way too!”
“Really…?”
Hearing a current Academy student say that made me feel like this was a gathering of individuals embracing solid life choices.
I scribbled out Otherworld Healing and Maid Café in the notebook I was holding. Above those, I added Otherworld Jungle Exploration: With Treasure Hunting.
The expression on Pink-Haired Lesbian’s face darkened when she caught a glimpse of my notebook.
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As our walking tired my legs, I asked Pink-Haired Lesbian for a princess carry. It allowed me to indirectly experience how the Second Prince Irid felt back then. I worried if I had subjected him to too harsh a trial. Thank you, Sexual Desire Suppression Magic!
The Red Tower Wizard, insisting “I’m not one of them!” asserted her distance while walking around 3 meters away, but eventually, she settled into a proper distance as if she had gotten accustomed to us.
The second place she introduced was the library.
“Half books, half students here, huh.”
Students with such dark circles under their eyes that they looked weeks overdue were frantically reading books and scribbling on parchment. Were students always this proactive and passionate?
“I can’t believe how impressive this is considering the semester hasn’t even started yet.”
“Hmph, I told you! The Academy is a place that nurtures talents who are the backbone of the Empire!”
“But they don’t look happy. More like they have knives at their throats forcing them to study.”
Some were even gulping potions while working on various tasks. There couldn’t be a mad professor assigning homework before the semester has even started, right? Was that all genuinely voluntary… study?
Seeing my puzzled expression, Pink-Haired Lesbian peered at my notebook and cautiously added, “I think those are teaching assistants. They’re likely already being ground down by the professors’ schemes.”
Ah, I see.
The struggles of TAs seem to mirror life in both the modern world and this realm. Poor beings who have forsaken their humanity for a beastlike existence. In that case, shouldn’t we at least create something like Otherworld Sleeping Chambers: Plush Dreamland Retreat to ensure comfortable and efficient rest?
“Helping other students grow while being a student themselves is truly rewarding, isn’t it? They must be so thrilled they can’t sleep at night, because of the excitement!”
“But they look incredibly tired…”
The credibility of the Red Tower Wizard wavered a little. Could it be that she was a model student so out of touch with the reality of regular students?
I patted a depressed-looking student’s shoulder in the library.
“Who are you?”
“Is a professor making you work like this?”
“No! I am so happy! Professor Alejandro is the best! I am voluntarily helping with his research!”
Seeing this, the Red Tower Wizard proudly lifted her chin.
“I told you I was right!”
“Definitely…”
If all students exhibited this level of enthusiasm, mere soft plush healing wouldn’t even come close.
I crossed out what I had written in my notebook and added: Thrilling Otherworld Dungeon Exploration of Nightmares.
Pink-Haired Lesbian’s pupils trembled as she glanced at my notebook.
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The third place she brought us to was the Academy’s North Gate.
Along the way, the Red Tower Wizard passionately listed eleven reasons why the Academy students were superhuman.
Initially, I wondered if, since a commoner accepting their place at the Academy felt like winning a lifetime victory, it might have led to an excessive, fantastical view of the Academy. However, after exploring, I came to understand her excitement had merit.
How could they be so diligently preparing even before school started?
Beyond the North Gate lay a vast forest managed by the Academy, where monsters suited to the students’ levels were intentionally released for training. Practical experience was essential, after all.
Apparently, some students had occasionally slipped up and met their end in that forest. The Second Prince must have dispatched me to prevent such losses. With illusion magic, one wouldn’t die unless it was from something like a heart attack.
Students with expressions that seemed to say they’ve seen it all walked beyond the North Gate into the woods. They looked utterly exhausted. But based on my experiences so far, I knew there was positive driving force and a sense of accomplishment behind those appearances.
“Kill me… please.”
That muttering from a student likely meant, “If I don’t break through this barrier and reach Metamorphosis immediately, I’d rather just die here.” Or perhaps, “A young man died here. That was my weak self from yesterday.” Wasn’t that the way it is?
“Uh, Mr. Crazy Wizard, Selvier— I mean, Red Tower Wizard— is a newly admitted student. It’s not a good attitude to believe someone who hasn’t even experienced the Academy yet.”
“Yet we saw the evidence with our own eyes.”
“Yes. We did see it, but there must have been unavoidable circumstances. Isn’t that correct? For their sake, we should consider opening Maid Café…”
I ignored Pink-Haired Lesbian’s malicious request filled with hidden, wicked desires.
To conclude our tour, I asked the Red Tower Wizard:
Q. If we need to provide experiences for Academy students, what kind of experiences would you say are necessary?
“Trials!”
“U-Um… maybe you should hold back on speaking any further.”
“We need trials, monumental struggles that can lead to Metamorphosis! If there’s anything Academy students lack, it’s just that!”
“Any more would— no, um, excuse me…”
“We need to traverse the boundaries between life and death countless times and face difficulties and adversities that can only be overcome by surpassing our limits!”
“…”
Understood. That fiery enthusiasm was definitely conveyed to me.
If the Academy was a gathering of students chanting a human anthem, then I must provide as many trials and adversities as possible. I tore a page out of my notebook and, with unwavering resolve, wrote down:
Otherworld Cthulhu: Centered Around Great Despair and Great Pain.
After seeing my notebook, Pink-Haired Lesbian looked like she had witnessed something horrific. It was as if she’d seen a professor announce a 100-fold exam difficulty increase.
Suddenly, Pink-Haired Lesbian grabbed the Red Tower Wizard by the collar.
“KYAH?!”
“Do you realize what you just did?!”
“W-Why are you being so sudden?!”
“…You’ve just taken away the students’ sanctuary!”
“So, what are you trying to say?!”
While I listened to them bicker, I quietly contemplated how to realistically convey the terror of cosmic octopuses. What kind of challenges could I provide that would make the Academy’s top players say, “This is pleasantly lukewarm, and we love it!”
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Inside the Academy, rumors began to circulate about sightings of the Red Tower Wizard being carried around by a female butler.
According to the testimony from an Academy student who went to the North Gate for material collection, he witnessed a catfight between a female butler and a female student over the Red Tower Wizard.
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