With a rustle, the moment the tentacle sliced, the realization hit. The gap between Robert and myself was considerable.
I had never even thought about how strong he might be, but still… I didn’t expect him to be stronger than the Dead Dragon’s power.
The pain accumulated in my body kept growing. The pain that surged with the memories was quite significant.
My heart felt like it was being gouged out, my insides seemed to be pulled out, and with that sharp pain choking my throat, I couldn’t focus on this fight.
This was the pain Robert had experienced.
I had no idea why I was enduring this. If I had to explain it, I suppose the word “karma” might fit best.
As Teresa recalled that word, she couldn’t help but chuckle.
The distance between her and Robert was gradually closing.
Every time Robert swung his sword, the Magic Power that blossomed cut through more tentacles,
The power that had seemed never-ending was gradually fading away.
There was no hesitation in that swing. Perhaps it was because of what I had said.
“I’ve never loved even once,” those words that meant nothing to me erased any hesitation.
For a moment, I caught a glimpse of his eyes and chuckled softly.
I couldn’t understand why, in such a situation, old memories were surfacing.
Was it something that stood out in my memory, or was it just nostalgia for that time?
What I couldn’t deny was that Robert had genuinely loved me.
Thus, the thought that blossomed was from a letter I had read long ago.
A letter that was bound to be the same, no matter what life I lived, which Robert sent after we first met.
It must have been written before his reincarnation began.
Since I had also received a letter for the first time, it might have stuck in my memory unusually well.
[I am writing this letter for the first time to someone, and I’m a little nervous. To be honest, I feel embarrassed about our last meeting. I didn’t want to show you that I was crying.]
With a rustle, Robert’s eyes narrowed as he sliced through another tentacle rising from the ground.
Teresa’s momentum weakened a bit. Why? I didn’t know the reason.
But it was certain that an opportunity to penetrate would soon appear.
The Magic Power dwelling in my body began to swirl and rise.
Like flames, the ignited Magic Power slowly started to consume the surrounding space.
Teresa’s ability gained from absorbing the Dead Dragon’s power was similar to that of demons.
I’d have to figure out how she absorbed the Dead Dragon’s power, but for now, shouldn’t I get closer first?
[To be honest, you were the first person to empathize with my situation. Or perhaps it would be more accurate to say you understood me. You smiled for me and approached me warmly. I want to express my gratitude first.]
There was no hesitation.
As for ending this connection, Robert held no distracting thoughts.
Even if he understood all the pain that I had endured, in the end, Teresa would die at my hands.
He didn’t seek repentance or regret. It would be better to simply disappear cleanly.
Now, I even thought it would be better if she just vanished.
Even if it was just me suffering, Teresa was a being that made me recall the past.
The time when I foolishly repeated my mistakes, the period when I searched for problems within myself in every situation.
With a crunch, I cut through the tentacles that were digging into my arm and ran.
The wounds began to heal slowly as the Magic Power seeped in.
Though it wasn’t as powerful as Divine Power, there was no issue with hemostasis.
I ran. Forgetting about the pain, I bit and severed the tentacles that tried to stop me.
I swung my sword, barely calming my thundering heart, and kicked the ground to move forward.
[You might be smiling while reading my letter by now. To be honest, I’m not quite sure what I should write, so I’m rambling on and jotting down whatever comes to mind. I’ve learned a lot about such manners for a long time, but it seems practice is indeed different.]
Suddenly, a chuckle escaped.
Teresa slowly drew the corners of her mouth down and reached out her hand toward Robert again.
A tendril extending from thin air forcefully struck Robert away.
It was impressive to block it with a sword and continue charging, but Teresa also knew well that this was merely stalling for time.
But why was she stopping it?
The emptiness that bloomed in her chest was a truly mysterious emotion.
Just yesterday, she was burning with a desire for revenge.
She had been so unhesitant in killing a child to offer as a sacrifice, declaring she would definitely kill Robert.
With a crunch, a hollow laugh escaped from the bones that would break from merely standing still.
“…Ahaha.”
The pain of facing Robert’s memories did not end.
The pain that flowed through her for an entire day was only intensifying and growing more agonizing.
The teeth that touched began to crack with a crunch.
Isn’t it true that people are so sly? Teresa was well aware that she was just an ordinary person.
That’s why she tried to use others, borrowing the name Taylor to restore her family.
But could it really be possible to love that person, even knowing all these facts?
She thought it was impossible unless she were a fool or an idiot.
That said, if Robert were to fall under that category, then that’s not the case.
Why would she have been harmed by a fool or an idiot?
However, Robert believed it was right.
She couldn’t understand.
Even still, amidst this increasing pain, it was the same that she couldn’t fully grasp Robert’s thoughts.
If it were her, she would have killed long ago.
Before reaching this situation, she would have likely killed everyone.
“I’m not the type to fit the name Taylor. I’m a bit weak and somewhat clumsy compared to others. I don’t have a strong backbone like my sister, nor am I perfect in every aspect like my father. Even if you asked me to point out what I’m good at, I wouldn’t easily find something. I’m that kind of person. With so many shortcomings, I might be someone who could disappoint you a lot if you got too close.”
Robert knew full well that he had many shortcomings.
Even when he first reincarnated, it was the same. He could endure the repeated deaths because he wanted to fill those lacking points, and to improve where he felt insufficient.
Perhaps his strength lay in this mental aspect.
Enduring dozens of deaths and having all those memories become one person’s was a lonely and miserable thing. That’s why he had moments of madness several times.
It isn’t easy to directly cut into one’s own arm.
He had also been so drained that he couldn’t even manage to die.
He endured it and came this far.
It would be a lie to say he hadn’t thought about the next iteration.
As his connection with Adrian deepened, as he met Adele again, as he became somewhat closer to Miragen.
He finally resolved to make this life the last one.
This was it.
If he killed Teresa this time, they would never meet again.
If they were to meet again, it would probably be in hell.
With a bitter smile, Robert swung his sword toward the air again.
Not just air. As the tendrils losing their vigor were severed, the gap between him and Teresa closed significantly.
Not long now. Until he thrust the sword into that heart.
“Yet the reason I send this letter to you is that I wish to continue our meeting. You may have been surprised by my blunt words. However, I hope you understand that this is not just a momentary impulse.”
Ha—
Robert’s breathing became rough, but it was the same for Teresa; she had certainly run low on strength.
Surely, in another two strikes, if that attack failed, her chest would be pierced by that sword.
But why was she hesitating?
In this situation, where reaching out to block the attack wouldn’t be insufficient, why was she hesitating, even if just for a moment?
Why hesitate for even a moment in this situation?
As the contents of a letter I had once seen flashed through my mind, there was an emotion slowly filling my chest.
I was loved. That heart held not a shred of falsehood or deceit.
There were times I was purely loved.
Is this why I harbor such feelings? Now, when the moment comes to say I’m sorry, when this pain has been felt and my whole body is crumbling away.
Is this when I finally embrace the feeling of regret?
“Ha.”
[I heard tomorrow’s weather will be nice. When I asked the mage tower directly, they said it’s the only day that won’t rain, no matter what. So I’m sending this invitation. It’s the garden my mother and I have tended since I was a child. I specifically planted violets, so I wanted to show you in person.]
Even I thought it was absurd, so Teresia let out a helpless chuckle, her hand slipping away.
The tendrils that had been reaching for Robert also crumbled powerless.
Tap-tap, the sound of footsteps dashing towards me without hesitation echoed.
The mansion, born from the influence of my power, gradually disappeared, revealing the sky above through the completely opened ceiling.
[If you come to my garden tomorrow, I hope we can meet with expressions different from last time. Back then, I was crying, and you looked at me with pity. But this time…]
Flame.
The fire wrapped around Robert’s sword.
The moonlight hidden by the clouds cast only dark shadows beneath the mansion.
The magic cutting through the shadows ignited and flew straight towards my heart.
Teresia’s gaze fell upon the tip of the sword. What would Robert’s expression be like, thrusting the sword towards her?
Would she cry like when they first met, or laugh like when they met again in the garden?
[All I wish is that we can smile at each other.]
But her expression remained entirely blank, and her lips twisted in the emptiness wrapping around her body.
Blood gushed from her mouth as the sword pierced her heart.
The tendrils squirming on the ground disintegrated, leaving only her limp body helplessly falling towards the earth.
A smile hung on Teresia’s lips.
It was an unmistakably vivid smile, one that surely flowed forth from memories.
[To Teresia Violet, from Robert Taylor.]
#
Teresia’s body slowly began to crumble.
The sword lodged in her heart also fell apart, yet she had already prepared another one just in case.
She would probably die soon. It felt refreshing, but at the same time, bittersweet.
The emotional rift with Teresia wasn’t deep enough to call it revenge,
this was merely for killing her in preparation for any potential variables that might arise later.
I wished for her to die painfully.
However, it seemed she had already endured enough pain.
The wounds visible on her body, repeatedly regenerated and injured, were familiar.
I had recognized long ago that she was suffering the pains I had endured in a previous cycle.
What exactly is the moonstone I possess?
I never thought it would do more than bring about reincarnation, affecting others and awakening their memories.
Teresia’s eyes, spitting blood, turned towards me.
They were different from before.
Her once dull gaze now held a slightly clearer light, reminiscent of the moment I first met her.
“I… hope you kill me quickly, but that must be difficult for you.”
“You’ve crossed the line too many times.”
The bones regrew and shattered again, my insides bursting out and tearing me apart.
It was horrendous just to look at, yet Teresia’s expression remained calm.
I could feel her twitching occasionally, but her gaze still remained fixed on me.
After spitting blood repeatedly, she briefly paused and slowly parted her lips.
“I think you know this, but you are really a foolish person. If you had killed me earlier, none of this would have happened. You know that, right?”
“I know.”
“If it were me, I wouldn’t have died a hundred times over. There’s a limit to being stupid—why a hundred times?”
“Why the hell did I do that a hundred times?”
Cough. Blood poured from everywhere, creating puddles on the ground.
As her power faded, the mansion disappeared, leaving only an empty estate behind.
Raindrops began to fall one by one from the overcast sky.
Tap. Tap-
It looked like it was about to rain as I gazed at the sky, and then I heard Teresa’s voice in my ear.
“Do you think I’ll regret what I did to you?”
“Not at all.”
“Then do you think I’ll feel sorry?”
“…Not at all.”
Then, Teresa burst into a soft laugh and smiled slightly.
After laughing for a while while looking at the sky, she wiped her face and turned her gaze toward me.
The light in her eyes had dimmed. It seemed transparent, unable to hold even a hint of light.
“I’m sorry.”
I turned my head at the sudden voice.
It was words I never expected to hear—something I never thought would come from Teresa.
I stared at her in silence for a while.
“I just… felt like I had to say this.”
Her lips, gradually paling, struggled to part.
It felt like she was squeezing out her last strength.
As her body began to scatter like dust, the healing process that had been continuously occurring came to a halt, leaving only her cold, rigid frame.
Her lips, which had trembled countless times, finally stopped moving.
Even her breaths, which echoed in this space for a brief moment, ceased. Eventually, only her empty eyes reached out into the void.
“Teresa.”
Even when I called her name, there was no reply.
Spouting words I never expected, I closed my mouth again.
There was no way an answer would return. She was dead.
The sword lodged in her heart simply stuck out of the ground.
The lips that had just moved and the eyes that had gazed into the void now scattered like dust, vanishing toward the sky.
She was dead. Teresa was, undeniably, dead.
I had plunged a sword into her heart myself, so it was surely confirmed.
The woman who had thought of reincarnation was dead. I had killed the woman I loved in my first life.
That was reality. Suddenly, laughter leaked out, and I quietly stared at the sky with a twisted smile.
Swish—
I became completely soaked in the pouring rain.
The blood that had pooled on the ground flowed away with the rainwater, making it impossible to distinguish where Teresa had been lying.
Water dripped from my drenched hair and fell onto my chest.
It touched my chest, then my arms. The stream of water flowed down, dripping from my fingers.
The dark sky revealed no moon.
Only the thick clouds pouring rain filled the space, leaving behind a stillness that couldn’t find a single ray of light.
I thought killing Teresa would bring relief.
I had never sent her off like this in all my past.
I believed that everything would be fine now, and that killing her would be my way of celebrating.
Strangely, my chest felt tight.
No matter how many times I pounded my chest, that tightness would not go away.
“Today’s weather is nice. I saw it in a letter, but did you really go all the way to the magic tower to ask about the weather?”
“If we were to meet, I thought that day should be the best weather day.”
A memory surfaced for a moment, and I snickered.
It was different from that day. It was different from the day when violets bloomed, marking the start of summer.
This was the rainy season at the end of winter.
A season where the once-purplish-blooming violets withered and disappeared.
As I looked at the stillness felt in the coolness of the rain soaking my body, I closed my eyes and quietly held my breath.
I hated rainy days.
Whenever I recalled the days I died, it was always a day when the rain poured sorrowfully.
In the damp, humid, and suffocating space, the sound of rain often revived feelings I had forgotten.
So I hated it.
Because being caught in the rain felt like I was crying too.
Support me by donating at least $10, and you'll have the right to request any novel from Novelpia (excluding 19+ content) using a newly developed tool.
