What would it sound like to her when I say I did nothing?
Believing or not believing it was entirely up to Teresa.
If she were to break free from doubt and realize it was the truth, then the end would only mean her older brother dies, but if her doubts grew…
Well, it seems I wouldn’t be able to live a normal life.
She knew well how terrifying growing doubts could be.
No matter how seemingly fine a person might be, if they lose their mind, they won’t see things clearly.
After gazing for a moment at Teresa, who was sitting there blankly and sobbing, I let out a small sigh.
“Let’s go now. The sun is setting.”
The sky was gradually darkening.
Even the last beam of light was hidden behind clouds, illuminating the garden only with a murky red glow.
It was pitiful.
A woman sitting on the ground, collapsed, looked more pathetic than anything else.
Despite calling her several times, Teresa, who hadn’t responded, finally stood up unsteadily.
For a moment, the moon reflected in her eyes, but that light quickly faded, leaving only her hollow gaze.
Her face, looking at me, was full of resentment.
Isn’t it only natural? If I harbor any other emotion after everything I’ve done, it would be doubly suspicious.
“…I’m going to curse you.”
“Please do.”
“I hope you die more pitifully than anyone else, and beg desperately, while your family and loved ones come to hate you.”
Resentment flowed from her wide-open eyes and fell like rain.
It was a downpour only falling on her.
Under this moon, the rain continued to pour down on her.
“I will curse you, Robert Taylor.”
“Is that so?”
“…Do you really know how unlucky you are to the very end? I’ve never loved someone like you from the start.”
“I know. I met you knowing that.”
At first, I didn’t know, but now I understand.
She’d likely never grasp the meaning of those words in her lifetime.
Receiving such a curse was nothing new.
After hearing it dozens or hundreds of times, it no longer hurt.
Given that, my expression remained unfazed. It’d be better to just stab her directly with a knife.
Such words posed no threat to me.
Watching Teresa stagger away, I felt an overwhelming sense of relief.
She looked at me as if I were incomprehensible, yet mixed with resentment and hate.
It should be a look of discomfort, yet I found myself feeling elated seeing her face.
Truth be told, I had already broken long ago.
How many people could live with their mind intact after dying dozens of times?
When the day comes that the spring in my head finally unwinds, I too will probably collapse just like Teresa did moments ago.
I only hope that day marks my eternal rest.
If I repeat reincarnation one more time, I might just lose it and kill everyone I see.
It’s still a wobbly balance.
I aim to live this life well, holding tightly to the string, ensuring it doesn’t fray.
“…This means Teresa will be quiet for a while.”
Arthur’s death could be described as ‘soon’, but in that mental state, he would probably be going haywire for months afterwards.
Even if someone were aiming for my life, it wouldn’t be right away.
It wouldn’t matter if an assassin came to visit.
I wasn’t foolish enough not to prepare for such things, plus I had experienced enough assassinations to be tired of them.
Come at me once, it would be a fantastic opportunity to show what Taylor could do in response.
Before I knew it, the garden was completely engulfed in darkness, and as I turned my head, I realized I was standing there all alone.
Teresa had vanished at some point, and I seemed to have been standing there blankly for a while.
It had already been more than half a month since I started my 101st life through reincarnation.
During that time, the only person I had lost was Teresa, which felt rather slow.
However, this relief in my chest was genuine.
Just cutting the chain of connections I had been forcing was enough.
Even if I saw her face again, I was confident I wouldn’t recall the past.
Did I say I regretted loving you?
Honestly, I had never even loved her in the first place, and yet I had uttered such words so easily.
“Tsk.”
Suddenly, rising irritation made me look up, and to my surprise, there was a beautifully bright full moon.
That pale light sliced through the darkness and swallowed the starlight around me, emitting a cool glow.
The shadow cast by the moon barely outlined only me, and it felt strangely pathetic.
More than a hundred times I had repeated time, but that moon remained unchanged—a reality.
Just how much had I changed during that time? I shut my eyes for a moment and inhaled.
Contrary to the cold light, the air was surprisingly warm.
That warmth soothed my body and effectively erased my chaotic thoughts.
Even if I had changed, I was still me.
What was there to think so complicatedly about? I just needed to properly do what I had to do.
I slapped my cheek once and moved my feet.
On the night of the full moon, walking in the moonlight felt lighter than ever.
#
“Lately, you seem to be looking at the moon often. Do you have some worries?”
A man who appeared to be a lieutenant spoke to the woman gazing blankly at the night sky.
His tone was so playful that it felt as if he were teasing me.
Adele clicked her tongue for a moment, then spoke to her lieutenant, Lothos.
“Nonsense. Go to sleep instead of chatting.”
“If I sleep now, I won’t be able to arrive on time. Hmm, shouldn’t we leave a little later to make it for the full moon festival?”
Lothos seemed puzzled by the reason for attending the full moon festival.
Why was she participating in a festival she always deemed bothersome this year?
It didn’t seem likely that she had any pressing business with someone.
The rise in barbarian invasions hadn’t increased, and even the Emperor wouldn’t care about something like this.
Not knowing why she had suddenly decided to attend the full moon festival, Lothos simply widened his eyes and waited for Adele’s response.
Adele had a pretty good idea of what Lothos was curious about.
Surely, he was asking why she was going to the full moon festival.
However, the answer was so simple that she found it amusing herself.
Because she simply wanted to go. That’s all.
I just wanted to go, that’s all.
The reason I didn’t go before was simply that I didn’t want to, and the reason I’m going this time is that I suddenly want to go.
Sometimes that happens, right?
You get tired of the usual things you do and start wanting to try something you always disliked.
But considering Adele’s position as Grand Duchess, I thought her subordinates underneath would have their own plans sorted out.
Of course, being close enough to Lothos, I could somewhat guess her true intentions.
“Are you seriously just going because you want to go?”
“Yeah, I suddenly wanted to. There’s someone I need to find.”
“Someone to find? But there haven’t been any notorious criminals that fled to the capital recently.”
“…Do you think I’m someone who just goes around catching criminals? I’m just going to find a man. There’s something I need to say, but I couldn’t say it then.”
At the mention of a man, Lothos’s eyes widened.
The same went for the subordinates hiding nearby, as Zeek peeked his head out from the concealed spot.
“What? A man?”
“A man!”
“The Duke said a man!”
In an instant, the room became a ruckus, and Adele shook her head while pinching the space between her brows.
I thought they’d be hiding, but with more than ten of them showing up, could it really be called hiding?
I had pretended not to notice, but seeing them show up openly made my head throb.
“So now you all just hide in plain sight. Aren’t you scared of me?”
“We are scared. So, um, could you please put that sword away?”
Lothos subtly pushed the sword from his neck and awkwardly smiled in response.
Adele’s face was always expressionless.
There were rare moments when something piqued her interest enough to make her laugh, but with a sword pointed at her… it was still a bit intimidating.
Once Adele put the sword away, Lothos and his group huddled together, waiting for Adele to speak.
“A man, huh? Coming from someone who looks like he’d die wielding a sword his whole life, that’s quite an entertaining thing to say.”
With the dull conversation and the already scarce topics in the North, the eyes looking at Adele began to sparkle with curiosity.
“I think I made a mistake. Let’s just pretend I didn’t say that.”
“But I heard you say a man—”
“Don’t you see the Duke is embarrassed? Just stay quiet.”
“But doesn’t that implicitly mean you acknowledged it? It means there’s a man you’re meeting, right?”
Even though I replied flatly, everyone had something to say in response.
They were already noisy to begin with; somehow, I felt like I had messed up.
I should have been more careful with my words.
Adele’s eyes narrowed as she regretted not just thinking it over alone.
Sensing the change, quick-witted Lothos kicked Zeek’s shin.
“Yow!”
“Shut up. Can’t you see the Duke is glaring at you?”
“I’m glaring at you right now, Lothos.”
Boldly, Adele’s lieutenant continued to smile sweetly.
You can’t point a sword at a smiling face, can you?
Suppressing her anger for a moment and taking a deep breath, Adele finally opened her mouth with a more composed expression.
“…Previously, I had someone I wanted to call over to the North.”
Someone other than a man, emphasizing that, her subordinates nodded in agreement.
He nodded.
In fact, they had been together since Adele led the mercenary group before becoming a duke.
No one knew what she wanted to say better than those present.
“I also gave him my handkerchief.”
Hiiick—
As someone swallowed their breath, Lothos glared to find the culprit.
On one hand, it felt like an alarm was ringing in his head.
Adjusting his glasses, Lothos opened his mouth carefully, recalling various thoughts.
At least, there hadn’t been many “men” who visited the north recently. Especially not someone looking for Adele Igrit.
Then that meant he ultimately didn’t respond to that request.
That man was quite impressive. To have the courage to refuse a request from the Grand Duke of the North…
Was his family from a duke’s lineage or something? Lothos pondered and asked.
“Could it be that you’re looking for that person?”
“Sort of. Anyway, I need to get my handkerchief back.”
“…Are you saying you’re planning to go to the full moon ceremony?”
“That’s because I want to go. I suddenly felt the urge to go.”
In that case… it was still okay. Lothos sighed in relief and wiped his forehead.
If this trip to the capital was happening because of a man, the entire northern defense army should have been on high alert.
Catch the annoying man who borrowed a handkerchief but didn’t come—he could almost see the ridiculous alarms ringing.
Hadn’t that happened a few times before?
The existence of Grand Duke Adele was quite special in the north.
It wasn’t just that she rose to the position of grand duke as a woman; her unique character had many similarities to the customs of the people settled in the north.
Did they say she resembled a wolf?
As Lothos recalled something the elder of the Northern Immigrant Tribe once said, he furrowed his brow.
Rumors about the grand duke’s man being so favored?
He could almost feel cold sweat trickling down at the thought of what would happen immediately.
‘As long as that doesn’t happen, I can deal with the rest.’
Just when Lothos thought he could avoid that, Adele added.
“And I’ll bring someone along as well.”
“Did you say you’re going to bring someone?”
“I asked him to come, but he didn’t, so I have to bring him this time. I liked that man.”
Adele’s voice was quite serious. However, what surprised Lothos was that Adele had faintly smiled.
That meant her liking wasn’t a lie.
But he couldn’t even imagine where she met such a person.
Though Adele had only been in the capital for less than a day, to say she liked someone in that time?
…He’d have to meet him to find out.
Whether the person liked it or not, once Adele made up her mind, she would likely stay in the capital until they met.
The light of the full moon streamed through the office window, illuminating the surroundings. The moon radiated a mystical light without a single cloud in sight.
What kind of connections would the full moon bring? Lothos rubbed his wrinkled forehead and sighed.
He had to believe that she wouldn’t really try to bring that person by force.
What if she did? He would have to roll around. Like a bug, rolling over and over.
It was infuriating that while his grand duke was doing work, he had to deal with all the worries.
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