As Kyle and I strolled around the festival grounds, I realized something.
Actually, I had known it before, but this time it hit me hard.
Even in such a joyous atmosphere, Kyle seemed oddly unresponsive.
I always knew he wasn’t the type to express himself much, but seeing him like this at the festival made it even more apparent.
“Kyle, did you have fun?”
“Yes.”
And there it was, his bland reply even when I asked him now.
If it were Louise or Elin, they would have been chattering away in excitement. But of course, that’s just classic Kyle for you.
Personally, I thought it would be nicer if Kyle would get a bit more animated and share his thoughts. Listening to him give such quiet replies made me wonder if he truly enjoyed it or if it was just me having fun.
Was it just me who enjoyed this?
“I’m glad to hear you had fun.”
Before we knew it, the festival had reached its final day.
Perhaps that’s why the streets and plazas were livelier than the other days, except for the first.
It was my first time at this festival, and I had an absolute blast.
Kyle might have replied in a tedious way, but he must have found some enjoyment too. He wasn’t the type to lie to me.
“The fireworks are tonight, right?”
“Yes, it’s the finale. It’s better suited for the evening than during the day.”
“True.”
Kyle and I were sitting together at a food stall, chatting casually.
We had thoroughly enjoyed the festival by this point, and simply sitting with him felt like more than enough.
“This turned out to be more fun than I expected. If I’d known, I should have come last year too.”
“You were probably too busy to come back then.”
“That’s true. I barely got to leave the castle, except for the first and last days.”
It must have been one of the busiest seasons of the year.
Of course, it wasn’t the only festival in Eristirol, but a week-long celebration had its challenges.
At this moment, I could only imagine how the duke was managing back then.
“…”
As we chatted ordinarily, thoughts of Kyle resurfaced.
I couldn’t stop thinking about him even yesterday, but sitting here made those thoughts come flooding back.
“Kyle, what would you have done if I’d said I wasn’t coming to the festival?”
Reflecting on it, it was Kyle who asked me to join him in the first place, which made this whole experience possible.
If he hadn’t asked me, I wondered what I would have done instead.
“Maybe I would have been helping my father at the castle.”
“Is that so?”
“Yeah, without Sophia around, there was no point in going down by myself.”
“I see….”
If it had been me…. No, I likely would have felt the same way.
There wouldn’t have been a reason to go down by myself and waste a week if Kyle weren’t here.
I probably would have stayed at the castle helping Kyle or spent the time in my room.
Or maybe just hanging out with Louise.
“….”
It felt… strange.
Why was I thinking that I wouldn’t have had a reason to come to the festival if it weren’t for Kyle?
It was a thought that slipped out so naturally, almost unconsciously.
Could it be… I was starting to value Kyle more than I realized?
“Sophia?”
“Ah, yes.”
“Where are you looking? You’ve been staring off into space.”
“I just remembered something I saw while I was coming over.”
Not true at all, but I answered that way.
It was tough to say exactly what was on my mind.
Kyle might occupy a bigger space in my heart than I thought.
I had told him before that there had to be some kind of event for me to develop feelings.
It was a passing comment made from the carriage, but I genuinely believed that.
Yet, that might not hold true.
Maybe my feelings had been slowly seeping in, just like water soaking into fabric.
“…”
It wasn’t as if I fell for him at first sight like he mentioned.
In fact, when I first met him, he was merely a twelve-year-old boy.
Such a thing was impossible.
For a moment, I almost blurted out Kyle’s name.
But then I quickly closed my mouth.
After saying his name, I had nothing else to say or think of.
“Kyle, let’s get up. Just sitting here is boring for you too, right?”
I decided to stand up to clear my thoughts, and maybe doing something with Kyle would buy me some time.
Otherwise, he might ask me what I was just pondering, and I wouldn’t have any time to think it through.
*
Afterward, I continued to wander around with Kyle, keeping those thoughts in mind.
Today, his hand felt warmer in mine, but there was something more important to think about.
What did I really think of Kyle?
To be honest, it was a tough topic.
Perhaps I stumbled upon it while getting lost in the ordinary thoughts of the day.
To sum it up, I couldn’t really give a definitive answer to whether I liked him or loved him.
It was philosophical and definitely a complicated question.
At least it was for me.
Despite the fact that I used to be a guy in my past life, developing feelings for someone I had treated like a little brother or student for years felt incredibly difficult.
Typically, it would be ethically tricky for a teacher and student to date or form such relationships.
At least, that’s how I felt.
Isn’t it strange for a person who met their crush back in elementary school to love them now?
Sure, a lot of time has passed since then, and Kyle is now an adult.
“Hah….”
“Sophia, are you okay? Should we head inside?”
“No, it’s almost time for the festival to end anyway, so why should we go in?”
The night had fully set in.
People were gathering in the square near the hill they had built on the first day, while we stood quietly just outside the crowd.
As always, the wind blew cold, but I didn’t feel cold at all.
One hand was held by Kyle, while the other was tucked in the pocket of the coat he had bought me, so I felt pleasantly warm instead.
“Hu….”
Even as I exhaled, my breath misted in the chilly air, but I still didn’t feel cold.
Not in body, not in spirit.
“Kyle.”
I called out his name, and as I did, he slowly turned his head from the doll perched atop the hill to look at me.
Was it the darkness that made it seem so?
Kyle’s eyes sparkled brighter than usual.
“Yes.”
“Remember when I jokingly suggested we date?”
“Yes.”
It was a strangely awkward start.
Actually, the real beginning might’ve been that day in the Grand Shrine when Kyle suddenly confessed to me.
Naturally, I didn’t think that was a normal start either.
He had suddenly taken me there and confessed without any kind of signal.
It was truly baffling.
I never even guessed Kyle had such feelings for me throughout those years.
He had casually shown up with a ruby ring and confessed. What kind of response did he expect?
Of course, I would reject him.
Even if Kyle was good-looking, it was out of my league.
“Back then, it was just ridiculous, wasn’t it?”
“Haha….”
“Logically speaking, I didn’t expect you to suddenly confess. You completely surprised me.”
“If I hadn’t confessed to Sophia back then, I wouldn’t be here with you at the festival now.”
“That’s true.”
As Kyle said, without his confession that day, we wouldn’t be here now.
I probably would’ve been helping him at his job in the castle.
After all, I was his private tutor and direct servant.
“I’m really grateful that I could spend time with Sophia like this. I’m glad I confessed to you that day.”
“…Yeah.”
I felt the same way.
I was fortunate that we could share this awesome time together.
I would’ve dismissed it as nonsense if someone had told me that I’d be enjoying the festival with Kyle just a few months ago.
“Kyle, do you still like me?”
I asked, knowing full well he would answer positively.
I just wanted to hear it.
That his response would carry the meaning that he loved me.
“Yes, I love you. Always.”
“Right.”
Those words always made my heart flutter.
How could he say something like that so easily?
For me, it felt so difficult to articulate.
The square was becoming more crowded.
The vendors were packing away their stalls, and people had come to witness the festival’s finale.
“It’s about to explode, right?”
“Yes, it should be.”
Soon, the fireworks would begin, marking the end of this spring festival, and the crowd in the square would gradually head home.
Kyle and I would return to the castle like always.
For now… we waited in silence for the fireworks.
We didn’t have anything immediate to say; just being here together felt lovely.
Not saying much was perfectly okay.
Just being here with Kyle amidst the pleasant atmosphere was enough for me.
“O!!!”
People had started a countdown, signaling the imminent fireworks display.
“Five!!”
“Four!!”
“Three!!!”
“Two!!!”
And with the sound of fireworks being launched, small bursts of light ascended into the sky.
It was a sight I’d only seen while being in Kyle’s library over the past few years.
Maybe that was why the little sparks heading towards the heavens were so beautiful.
Then the little sparks blossomed into full blooms in the sky.
The first pop of the firework was followed by more, launching one by one into the sky.
I shifted my gaze from the fireworks to Kyle.
He stood there, fixated on the exploding fireworks above, completely still.
The people gathered in the square cheered joyously, but my focus was entirely on Kyle.
Looking at his face made my heart race.
“Ah.”
Finally, I understood.
Why hadn’t I realized it before?
Was it because the atmosphere was so incredibly delightful?
Perhaps that was it.
The mood greatly affects how people feel.
“Sophia.”
“Kyle.”
I intended to call him first, but he called my name first.
No, to say he called it first was a minor difference; it was practically simultaneous.
“…Shall you say it first?”
“No, it’s fine for you to go first, Sophia.”
“No, you can say it first.”
I hesitated to speak because the next words would be too embarrassing.
I wasn’t as composed as Kyle in expressing such feelings.
I didn’t know what Kyle wanted to say, but I wished he would go first.
“I really don’t mind waiting my turn.”
“…You say it first.”
“No, you go first.”
“Neither!”
At this rate, it seemed like we’d never conclude.
“Let’s just say it simultaneously.”
It was embarrassing, but this was probably for the best.
Rather than stammering and risking not saying anything before the fireworks ended, it would simply be easier to blurt it out together.
“Alright.”
“Hu….” Saying it felt too humiliating.
How could Kyle say such words so casually every time?
“Then I’ll say it…?”
I directed my gaze toward Kyle as I spoke, and he nodded in agreement.
I took a deep breath one last time.
Then I squeezed my eyes shut and said the words I had never properly spoken until now.
“I like you.”
Compared to what Kyle said, it felt like such a feeble expression. I couldn’t muster up anything more passionate.
Expressing something like that would take me years, I feared.
But this was the best I could do right now.
A mere three-letter word, but it was the utmost I could offer.
Thinking about how, at my mid-twenties, I could only articulate my feelings in such a minimal way felt slightly pathetic.
I had thought I needed some kind of event to fall in love.
Yet, looking back, there had been quite a few “events” already.
Not counting balls or dates with Kyle, there had been surprisingly many.
When Kyle rescued me, when he helped me through difficult times, and when he gently wished me goodnight before I fell asleep.
Though I hadn’t noticed at that time, now I saw those as fluttering moments in my heart.
Maybe realizing this now was a bit late.
Or perhaps it was a blessing that I understood it just then.
“…”
Either I was shy for saying those words, or my brain had just frozen.
All I could hear was the sound of fireworks and the loud cheers around us.
Kyle’s voice was completely absent, drowned out by everything else.
“Kyle?”
When I opened my eyes, I saw Kyle covering his mouth.
We had agreed to speak at the same time, didn’t we?
“N-no way…!”
“Sophia, do I like you?”
“N-no!!”
Kyle was laughing behind his closed lips.
He had clearly never intended to speak simultaneously in the first place.
“M-moron! Do you know what kind of feelings I just shared with you?!”
My face burned, and my heart raced rapidly.
It wasn’t just because I confessed something similar to Kyle, but he had turned it into a joke by going off-script like that, which was all the more embarrassing.
Just when I’d finally understood my heart, I had awkwardly admitted something mushy.
If I had known this would happen, I would have forced him to talk first!
“Sophia.”
“O-okay…”
Kyle suddenly pushed me against the wall.
“Please say it again.”
“What?!”
I pretended not to understand, but it was hard to hide how incredibly embarrassed I felt.
Having just mustered the courage to say what I did, I didn’t want to flinch now.
“Shall I say it first, then?”
“If you try to get out of this again, I’m going to be angry with you.”
We had just agreed to speak at the same time, and yet he was attempting to dodge using the same trick again.
Even though I was wedged between the wall and Kyle, I was not going to let this go easily.
“This time, I really will go first.”
“….Just do it.”
With one hand pinned against the wall, my escape options were limited.
I felt deeply embarrassed, but besides that, I had no choice but to quietly listen to what Kyle had to say.
“I like you too.”
“….”
“Please answer me, Sophia. Do you like me?”
“I… yes.”
I mumbled a half-hearted response.
I wasn’t strong enough to say such bold words with calmness like Kyle did.
My heart felt like it might burst from the pressure of everything.
“Please say it properly.”
“I can’t believe you! I already said it!”
It felt so unfair.
Having already confessed, demanding me to repeat it was crossing the line.
The mere fact that I wanted to escape was bad enough, and now he was adding to the burden by insisting on this too!
“Just say it once more, and I won’t ask again.”
“…Really?”
“Yes, really.”
“….”
Fine, it’d only be once.
No more, no less!
Say it once and bolt back to the castle.
We might share a room, but I could sleep in my room for tonight, even if it was just for today.
Probably, hopefully.
“I like you. Is that enough?! Now can we please move on?!”
Even as I got the words out, Kyle didn’t loosen his grip.
After confessing something like that twice, the embarrassment had escalated to a whole new level.
And now I only wanted to flee this place.
“K-Kyle? I really want to go back now…?”
“Sophia, thank you.”
“W-hat!?”
And suddenly, his lips pressed against mine.
It was so unexpected.
But at the same time, the kiss felt unusually sweet today.
I usually disliked sweet things, yet this sugary taste was surprisingly delightful.
“Ugh… uh… ha… um….”
My head felt hazy, but one thing was crystal clear.
Even while my lips were intertwined with Kyle’s, I felt so good.
It was almost suspiciously lovely.
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