Since some point, I’ve felt like I’m being whittled away. The endless cycle of regressions and unnamed malice directed at me seemed to gnaw at my sanity all by itself.
It wasn’t until I gave up counting the number of times I’ve regressed that I finally became numb to the malice.
Or at least, I thought so.
“..Hah.”
But that wasn’t the case.
I believed I was laughing off the malice nonchalantly, but just now, I could feel it clearly: all of that was just a facade.
Perhaps I had grown dull because I got too comfortable with the peace that Duke Hardenberg had given me.
When I turned my head, I could see him sleeping with his eyes closed. His face was still unrealistically handsome. A single scar was a bit bothersome, but even that seemed to give Abel a certain charm.
That’s why it felt strange. It was like proof that this world wasn’t the one I was supposed to be in, and it gnawed at my insides a bit.
The sensation I had felt during numerous tortures and deaths had hit me again, the feeling of being disconnected from this world.
‘..Get it together, Adele.’
Just because things seemed to be going well through negotiations with the duke, I shouldn’t let my guard down. My misfortunes always came right after I expected things to go well.
There was no reason this time would be different.
“You look deep in thought.”
“Huh? Ah…”
Abel was now awake, observing my breath. As he said, it was only natural for me to have many thoughts. The engagement ceremony was merely the beginning of my plans for survival.
I wondered how he felt about it; probably quite different from my perspective. In the end, Abel was just another member of the upper class in this world.
“I…”
“Are you worried about the noble lady’s fate?”
The noble lady, that must be Luna, the girl who tried to pour wine on me. In a situation where I should be worried about my own survival, I shouldn’t be concerned about such a girl, yet now that I heard the word ‘fate,’ it couldn’t help but stick in my mind.
“She will likely be socially dead, just like you once were in the past.”
“What?”
“No matter how infamous you are, that was the engagement ceremony of the House of Hardenberg. Most of the nobles present seemed to have no clue about your misdeeds.”
“That means…”
“You might even be expelled from your house. The House of Aite isn’t that merciful.”
With that, Abel ended his statement with a crooked smile. That grin, fitting for someone called a master manipulator, sent shivers down my spine. It felt strange to see him lightly discussing someone else’s miserable fate.
No, the image he showed me as my fiancé was probably the mask he wore. Being a duke in the Empire wouldn’t be an easy position.
He might have seen more hardship than even a regressor like me.
“Don’t you think that’s a good thing?”
“Huh? What do you mean…”
“If it were the usual case, I would have made my own moves, but with the House of Aite, the story is a bit different.”
The House of Aite had had deep ties to the House of Hardenberg for generations. Strategic marriages between the two families were rather common. The girl who introduced herself as Luna could have originally become Abel’s fiancée.
Of course, since Abel had already become a duke, that connection had been severed. I had heard rumors from Lily, but I didn’t think they were true.
“If that’s the case…”
Was that why she poured wine on me? She likely thought this place should have belonged to her in the first place. When I turned my head, Abel was nodding as if my thoughts were correct.
“Isn’t it ridiculous? The connection with the House of Aite must have been cut long ago.”
He said that and let out a chuckle.
“Of course, thanks to her, our contractual marriage will go much smoother, so it’s a good thing.”
That seemed odd. I thought I had been through a lot as a regressor, but no matter how long I lived, I could never get used to the noble mindset.
The cold aspect of treating people merely as commodities or disposable tools.
I had understood that their thinking was different long ago, but it was only now, in this situation, that I could truly feel how different I was from Abel, the duke, who belonged to the medieval world.
“Is that so.”
With those words, silence filled the carriage as I quietly closed my eyes.
It was a bit of a tiring night.
§
In the deep night, with the moon hanging in the middle of the sky, I stared blankly at the night sky from where the soft silver light fell through the window. The stars shone in positions different from the constellations I knew.
I found my gaze drawn to a cluster of stars that emitted a remarkably clear white light.
In this world, there’s a superstition. It is said that there are as many constellations in the night sky as there are people, and one of them is one’s own constellation.
Having read the original story, I know that this is true, but among the people, it remains just a superstition.
“Constellation, huh.”
Stars glowing especially brightly among many others. I also know well that they symbolize the fates of individuals. I understand that the moment one dies, the light of that star goes out.
So what fate does my star, flickering like a broken streetlamp, symbolize? Is it attempting to warn me as I approach death?
“What do you think? Count Aite?”
“I… I don’t know.”
Count Aite replied with a trembling voice. He didn’t seem interested in my constellation narrative; instead, he kept rolling his eyes as if his mind was in a frenzy.
The absurdity of his demeanor made me unintentionally chuckle.
“Right, you wouldn’t know. After all, you can’t even take care of your own daughter.”
“I’m sorry.”
Count Aite knelt down quite simply. Of course, even a count wouldn’t kneel so easily in front of a duke. Regardless of the differences in status, there are basic courtesies among nobles.
However, he once led the plot to assassinate me alongside his father. That’s probably why he’s being unusually humble now. Innocent Lady Luna might think her father cherishes her, which makes her act so brazenly.
‘The issue was picking the wrong opponent.’
Unfortunately, Count Aite is also a noble. There’s little chance he would dare to think of shielding his child with the prospect of death. More than anything, the fact that he’s still alive and well is merely due to my mercy.
As if reading my thoughts, the sound of him swallowing hard reached my ears.
“Your life and your daughter’s reputation, it’s a simple calculation, isn’t it?”
“Yes.”
I could feel his trembling hands even from here. Under the blatant threat, Count Aite couldn’t say anything more and merely squeezed his eyes shut.
From his perspective, it must be quite a nightmare; his poor parenting of his child could easily cost him his life.
“Get out.”
“Yes.”
With those words, Count Aite closed the door and hurriedly left. As soon as his figure disappeared, a dark silhouette emerged from beside the door. Sheathing the dagger in his hand, he quickly knelt before me.
“Will you spare me?”
“Sure. It seems like you’re not entangled with the imperial family.”
Indeed, he was quick to get his head back in the political game. He clearly bore the marks of someone who had made a deal with the imperial family, and if I had any sign of that, I would have killed him on the spot to silence him.
Well, considering he had a bomb collar around his neck from the start, it was only reasonable.
It was rather expected that many would die foolishly without being able to do something as fundamental as that, but Count Aite was quite a useful card. More importantly, he was someone who knew a bit about the imperial family’s secrets, so there was no need to be overly wary of betrayal.
“Where are the royal nests?”
“I found a total of five nests in the local areas. We succeeded in destroying three of them, but it seems the other two fled long ago.”
“How about the capital?”
“..I couldn’t locate it. It seems some form of cognitive distortion was at play.”
Well, that’s to be expected. The fact that the crows managed to raid three nests already was quite impressive. It seems the imperial family doesn’t have that heavy of a hand in the provinces as I thought.
Considering the size of the Arye Empire’s territory, it makes sense. It’s an empire that takes up 70% of the world’s territory. It’s more surprising that they missed two nests.
‘The emperor…’
The cards I’ve been dealt are Adele, the crows, and the Black Raven Knights. It seems sorely insufficient to contend with the emperor, but with Adele’s regression ability, I should be able to handle it.
For that purpose, I need to build a relationship of trust with her.
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