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Chapter 146

“Why did you do that?”

Eliya spoke in a short, dry voice.

“Miss, I can explain. First…”

“Why… why on earth?”

Eliya didn’t seem to hear her words.

She mumbled weakly and hollowly.

The one who was approaching halted mid-step.

Eliya turned to look at him.

A face without expression.

Different from the fabricated blankness he knew.

A face devoid of expression because she couldn’t show any.

A dead visage.

Shining golden, looking at him with empty eyes.

Big eyes continually shedding tears as if they were leaking.

“Did it really have to be this way? With me…”

Eliya, who was about to say something, bit her tongue.

“Miss, please calm down…”

Judas approached but froze in place.

[‘Discovery of Revelation’ activated. Immune to all magic for 3 seconds.]

‘What…’

For three seconds, he stood still, confused by the incomprehensible notification.

[Next use in 24 hours.]

“Impressive.”

Eliya laughed weakly.

“And you’ve got the perfect countermeasures for the ban.”

Only then did Judas realize.

Eliya had just tried to confirm her own memories.

But her progress was blocked by the Discovery of Revelation.

“Come to think of it, there was a moment in the past when I wanted to see your memories too.”

The day he almost choked Judas to death.

“At that time, I thought I mishandled magic because I was flustered…”

Eliya burst into laughter, her shoulders shaking.

“That wasn’t it. It was because you were someone who was perfected to kill me.”

Once again, Judas recalled those cruel words in his head.

Fate is completed through actions that attempt to avoid that very fate.

Judas clenched his teeth and hurriedly denied it.

“That’s not true! If you check again…”

“Why did you do that?”

But Eliya wasn’t listening to Judas.

She was buried under her own certainty.

“If you’re going to make me this miserable, just kill me. Why did you treat me so well?”

Eliya knew the answer.

It was so she would let her guard down and kill her in the most certain and safe manner.

Knowing this, she still had to ask.

It wasn’t a question seeking an answer.

No explanation would suffice no matter what words she received.

“Did I do something so wrong to you…? Or did you have lust for me as a man?”

“Miss, no, that’s not…”

“You said you liked me. When you said that, how did you feel?”

“……”

“What about when you said you liked me in front of my mom’s grave? What did you feel then?”

Judas found himself unable to voice his thoughts.

It felt like something was choking his throat.

He had to say something, but he had no idea where to start.

How did it feel?

Separating that moment from the context, it might sound a bit childish, but he was overjoyed beyond measure.

It felt the same when he turned his heart around.

Individuals are eternally unreachable other, making it frightening to lay bare one’s heart.

But he had received that heart from Eliya.

What’s more joyful was that Eliya had also received the heart he conveyed.

That was a miracle.

At the same time, it was terrifying.

Why did they have to meet in this form?

Judas resolved to tell the truth first.

“I really do, as I said back then, sincerely care for you.”

He looked directly into Eliya’s hollow eyes.

He couldn’t tell if she was truly seeing him, but he had to say what needed to be said.

“And I know that this is difficult for you to accept. However, I truly… I have no memories prior to meeting you. I was trained and don’t remember the past where I committed those wrongdoings. I only recently found out that my past was like that. I know it’s hard to believe…”

“……”

“In fact, I’m not originally the person named Judas; I came from another world…”

“…Cough!”

Eliya covered her mouth, laughing.

“Keheh! Hahaha! Ahahahah-!”

Even while shedding tears, Eliya burst into merry laughter.

She bent over with laughter.

She looked like someone who was laughing so hard they were crying.

“Judas, what are you trying to do right now?”

Judas bit his lip.

He had somewhat expected this reaction.

He spoke, knowing it would be futile.

For him, there was no more certain truth than that.

The truth that he had possessed the memories of a stranger, completely unaware of the past.

Naturally, that sounded like a ridiculous excuse to Eliya.

“Are you telling me to believe that? Judas.”

Suddenly stopping her laughter, she looked straight at him with narrowed eyes.

“Don’t overdo it.”

“……”

“If you’re going to kill me, just do it quickly. Don’t toy with me.”

“Miss, I…”

“Just kill me already—!”

Eliya screamed as if her throat was tearing apart.

Her shriek froze Judas’s body.

“If you’re going to kill me, do it now! Please…! Just don’t make it more miserable, just kill me—!”

Screaming, she collapsed onto the floor.

She slammed the ground with her little hands.

With her hair all disheveled, she started to beg.

“Please… Judas. Just kill me… I’m begging you….”

“……”

Judas brushed his bangs back in frustration.

How could he persuade her?

Feeling lost in front of her, who was exhausted from yelling and instead begging for death, he felt utterly lost.

He knelt in front of Eliya.

A bit late, but he had to speak only the truth and persuade her.

“I like you a lot, very much. I’m not used to feelings and experiences like these, so I couldn’t handle them maturely. I’m sorry. I should have told you sooner when I realized…”

If he had said it earlier, would things have genuinely changed?

He didn’t know.

It could have, or it could not.

Speculating that things would have been different is meaningless for what has already passed.

It’s easy to judge after confirming the wrong answer that things might have been better had he chosen rightly then.

It’s like pointing fingers at someone else’s affair.

Until one sees the results, one cannot know.

“I know it’s hard to believe. I know this, but I truly didn’t come to kill you….”

Suddenly caught up in his thoughts, Judas’s mind went blank.

It’s one thing to say he didn’t come to kill Eliya.

But what about the truth that he killed Maria?

Would this apology and confession change the past?

Does forgetting the incident mean it never happened?

Will the dead Maria come back to life?

Will the wounds in Eliya’s heart heal?

What on earth should he do?

“Why aren’t you killing me….”

While Judas was in a state of confusion, Eliya mumbled to herself.

“Why isn’t he killing me… It’s the perfect time to do it…”

A brief moment of silence.

She soon realized.

“…Ah. I see. You’re trying to capture me without killing me. You want to use my powers. Right? You plan to use the Sun’s Power.”

“No, Miss, please listen to me….”

Eliya staggered to her feet.

Only her face hidden in shadows glimmered with a crazed fire in her eyes.

Judas also gazed up at her and cautiously stood up.

At that moment, his instincts sent shivers down his spine.

Eliya, who had been hanging her head lifelessly, suddenly lifted it.

Her burning golden eyes glared at Judas, flames erupting from her.

A golden fireball rained down on Judas.

At that moment, he witnessed.

The second tragedy.

Eliya, with tears streaming down her angry face, pouring magic at him.

The scene unfolded before him exactly as it did back then.

Judas reflexively raised his arms.

In a heartbeat, the memories of the last day he died in his previous life flashed before him.

Dimming briefly shortly after arriving here, but resurfacing as he lived.

The day he was stabbed in the stomach and died.

He had lived burying it as a life that didn’t hold much meaning.

When he squeezed his eyes shut and opened them again, his body was intact.

He suddenly recalled.

Due to the complete moon, he was immune to the fire.

However, the complete moon didn’t activate.

Eliya’s golden flames completely missed him.

No fire ignited around, nor was there an explosion.

They vanished entirely.

“Ah… ahahaha….”

Eliya, laughing weakly, sat down in defeat.

Even amidst this, the thought that he might get hurt made her heart drop.

Yes. She worried about him.

It was a terrible emotion.

So, instinctively, just before the flames could touch him, she diverted them and made them disappear.

It was a reflex.

Disgusting.

Disgusting was the feeling of being her.

Disgusting was the assassin who deceived her and stayed by her side, building feelings.

Everything in this world felt repulsive and tiresome.

“Miss…?”

Judas realized she had intentionally missed him and canceled the magic.

He cautiously knelt before her, one knee on the ground.

“Judas….”

Eliya looked at him.

Her glowing eyes locked with Judas’s.

Golden eyes shining differently.

Eliya intertwined her fingers with Judas’s.

Amidst the confusion, Judas quietly let his hand be taken.

Even now, when their skin touched, a warm, sunny-like energy seeped into him.

The same went for Eliya.

A pleasant breeze, like a cool late summer night after the rain, flowed into their bodies.

If it weren’t for this, he would never have been so obsessed with her.

It was both disgusting and lovely.

His mind was in chaos.

His reason couldn’t think straight.

“I hate you so much.”

“……”

“But more than that, I… I like you so much.”

“……”

“I wished for your death, but if you were to die, I feel like I might die again just like before.”

“……”

“For you, if what you desire is my life, I might just willingly die. Beyond just liking you… I deeply, profoundly love you.”

“……”

“But then, what happens to my mom? Hmm…? And what about me, who has achieved nothing nor protected anything, what am I supposed to do in this situation?”

Unable to say anything while watching her weep, Judas merely tugged their joined hands.

He carefully held Eliya close.

Eliya didn’t refuse and nestled against him like before.

Soon, she began to cry like a child.

Holding that small, precious warmth, he said.

“I also… love you very much….”

Somehow, that confession felt like it didn’t quite reach her.

*

“…Eli?”

Ria, having finished cleaning the bedroom, saw a flash of light.

Golden light.

It burst forth from Eliya’s office.

As far as Ria knew, Judas and Eliya were together there.

But golden flames? Wasn’t that supposed to be a spell meant to harm the other?

‘What’s going on…?’

Instinctively, she felt something was about to unfold between Eliya and Judas.

She needed to intervene before it was too late.

Ria hurried towards the office.


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