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Chapter 160

“…Lady? Are you alright?”

The first thing Eliya saw when she opened her eyes was a pair of purple eyes.

Yurideke, who had come closer, was calling her with concern.

“Why are you suddenly like this? Are you feeling unwell?”

“…How much time has passed?”

“Huh? Time?”

Eliya blinked and looked around.

The scenery looked almost unchanged from before she had sneaked a peek into Judas’s memories.

‘Hasn’t it been long?’

Yurideke spoke.

“I don’t know what kind of time you’re talking about, but suddenly your eyes turned golden and you seemed lost in thought. That’s why I was calling you…”

It seemed to mean only a few seconds had passed.

Eliya clenched and unclenched her hands to regain her sense of reality.

Although she had only caught glimpses, she had just peered into decades of someone else’s memories.

Her head felt dizzy.

‘I’m glad I came back quickly….’

But then she felt a sense of unease.

It was like an overwhelming fear that came from the conviction that she couldn’t understand this world.

‘This place is… fake….’

Even she, who was born and raised in this world, was not a real being.

She was a created virtual entity.

Yet, the sensations were so vivid.

The time she shared with him, and the feelings from those days.

Even her feelings of guilt and deep regret were as clear as cold ice and hot fire.

She didn’t know how to accept it.

She just grew vague and fearful.
If life itself had no meaning beyond this world, then, what on earth…

“Do you feel unwell? Why are you….”

At the moment Yurideke was speaking.

Eliya flinched.

Judas’s fingertips moved.

“…!”

The three people in the room looked at him simultaneously.

Hermis quickly shouted.

“It seems consciousness is returning! I’ll get a physician!”

In the commotion, Yurideke remained calm as she watched Judas.

Meanwhile, Eliya hesitated as she tried to hold his hand.

‘Is it alright for me to be here…?’

She had done such terrible things to Judas.

She felt as if she had to escape this place.

She was a sinner.

A sinner had no right to be next to him.

Moreover, she wasn’t a real person.

She was a virtual character.

Not just herself, but Yurideke in front of her, and the entire world were not real.

Judas had encountered her as such an entity.

Looking at him was terrifying.

Just as she was about to run away.

With a swift motion!

Judas grabbed Eliya’s wrist.

Still with his eyes closed, he spoke in a muffled voice.

“Having seen someone else’s memories, where do you think you’re going….”

“…!”

While Eliya had been viewing Judas’s memories, he had also been watching her.

Thanks to that, he had learned about the past of the original body he possessed.

He chuckled inwardly.

Why did it have to be this character that he was inserted into, making him go through all this hardship?

Yet, the situation felt oddly familiar.

He recalled the future he saw on the day of the Installation Ceremony.

How he had collapsed.

The scene that was referred to as Eliya’s comedy.

Now he understood why that was comedic.

It was because of this very moment.

Eliya, hesitating, finally took his hand.

She was cautious, as if handling cracked glass.

With a voice more precarious, she asked.

“Judas… am I… not unwanted…?”

Judas slowly opened his eyes.

His golden irises looked up.

His face was slightly different from the figure known as Judas Defecit.

But he was undoubtedly the Judas she knew.

Judas smiled weakly.

“If you’ve seen it all, then you should know….”

“…….”

It was exactly as he said.

There was no way she wouldn’t know.

Until the end, how much he cherished her.

“Why, why would you hold me so dear… I’ve done terrible things to you….”

“It’s nobody’s fault.”

“……”

“It’s absurd how this all came to be, but it’s not your fault, nor mine.”

Eliya took all the blame.

Judas’s current state, and her mother’s condition—basically dead despite being alive—were all her fault in her eyes.

Only in that way could her heart find peace.

If it wasn’t anyone’s fault, she didn’t know where to direct her resentment.

Thus, Eliya chose self-loathing.

But Judas corrected her, claiming it was nobody’s fault.

There was no one to blame.

“This is just a cursed fate and a tragedy….”

Desiring someone to blame, she blamed herself, but Judas took away that responsibility.

However.

Fear still lingered in Eliya’s heart.

“Judas. What am I to you? Am I a real person, or…?”

She couldn’t forget the scene she saw in the memories.

How did Judas see her?

She half-knew the answer.

But she wanted confirmation.

Turning his thinly opened eyes toward her, Judas stared as if time had stopped, then said.

“I see you.”

He pulled her hand.

Eliya was drawn toward him.

As she fell into his chest, Judas took a deep breath against her head.

“I can smell you.”

Eliya stifled her rising sobs.

Her breaths became ragged.

After a brief pause, Judas continued.

“I can hear your breathing.”

Holding her tighter against him, he said.

“I can feel your warmth by touching you.”

“……”

“What else could you possibly be if not real?”

She knew.

Having peeked into Judas’s memories, of course, she couldn’t help but know.

He treated her as a real person.

If it were before possessing him, perhaps it wouldn’t have been clear.

But since possessing him, he had never ignored her reality or himself as virtual.

Not even once.

Knowing that, she still sought confirmation.

And she was acknowledged.

That admission felt like salvation.

Who am I?

What constitutes the existence of Eliya?

How do we define what’s real?

She decided to set aside the complex questions.

Judas called her the real Eliya.

Then she could be the real Eliya.

That was enough.

More than enough.

Feeling his warmth, looking at his face, hearing his voice, smelling the scent coming from his embrace.

Every sensation lived and breathed.

She, the one receiving his love, was the real Eliya.

Eliya became certain.

She entrusted her existence to him. She decided to rely on him.

“What am I to you, then?”

Judas asked.

He knew Eliya had peeked into his memories, but he didn’t know her thoughts or feelings.

He was also curious.

Judas Defecit.

A character who had confronted this world like a game.

How did Eliya think of him?

“You are….”

Eliya raised her head.

With a tearful smile, she answered.

“You are the person I know and have experienced.”

Colors. Weaknesses. Worlds. Universes.

Judas Defecit.

She could explain him in countless words, yet no words could confine him.

To her, he was not merely an entity defined by language.

Essence wasn’t important.

Whether he was Judas Defecit or just Judas.

Experiences surpassed essence.

He was the one who protected her.

The one who loved her, and whom she loved too.

A name was merely a means of address.

But that name always somehow defined who he was.

“You are, my Judas.”

It was a sentence that encapsulated the years they shared together.

Even if the world was fake, the experiences and feelings they shared were all real.

He had also recognized her as real.

Then, this world became real.

Breathing a sigh of relief, Judas embraced her shoulders.

That was enough.

If Eliya thought of him that way, then he didn’t need to dwell on it.

It was a rather dependent and weak way of thinking.

She was confining her existence to someone else’s judgment.

But if they both desired that,

Then there was no reason to blame.

If they both acknowledged each other, the essence of it all didn’t matter.

“…I’m sorry I didn’t speak honestly earlier.”

When he realized he was an assassin to Eliya.

If he had spoken of it right away, perhaps things wouldn’t have developed to this extent.

That had weighed heavy on Judas’s heart.

“Ugh…!”

Eliya inhaled, biting her lip tightly.

It was her fault, so why was he apologizing?

Even amidst all this, his kindness made her feel so grateful and lovable, yet her heart ached with guilt.

“Ugh…!”

As Eliya sobbed, Judas gently patted and held her.

As they quietly embraced mid-sob….

“…Cough, cough! Ahem!”

Yurideke cleared her throat to announce her presence.

“Eek?!”

Judas startled and flailed.

“Ah, oh! Uh, Yurideke? A-ah, you’ve been here… since when? S-sorry….”

While he half-rises in panic, Eliya is nestled against his chest like a cicada.

It was quite comfortable.

“Um… I’ve been here for a while…. N-no need to apologize. Um, you young folks are quite enthusiastic, it seems. It’s a nice sight, haha….”

Yurideke blushed, fanning herself with her hand.

They must have had quite the heated exchange, but the specifics eluded her.

And now she was witnessing it all, feeling awkward and embarrassed.

“I came to clear up what seems to be a misunderstanding between you two, but, well… it looks like you’ve figured it out well enough…. Hmm….”

“Yeah, um… oh, cough….”

Just then, the door swung open abruptly with a bang.

“Judas! Are you alright….”

Hermis rushed in, then froze.

He looked at Judas sitting up and Eliya clinging to him.

“…Well then.”

“Rather than worrying, it’s probably more like….”

Feeling awkward, Judas scratched the back of his neck.

Still, the physician, Mei, and Gale did their jobs.

They examined his injuries and checked if there were any others.

While being checked, Judas looked ahead.

A large crystal leaned against the wall opposite the bed.

Inside the translucent sky blue ice was a figure trapped.

Maria.

Her chest had Judas’s dagger stuck in it.

He swallowed a sigh inwardly.

‘I hope she can be saved… she must be.’

The two physicians finished their examination.

Although Eliya’s close presence was somewhat bothersome, it wasn’t the time to tell her to move.

Fortunately, his condition seemed fine.

“There are no visible abnormalities. However, it was quite a deep wound, and since you just woke up, don’t overdo it…”

While Mei was explaining, Eliya glanced at her palm.

‘What’s this…?’

The brilliant gold that had stained her skin before was now spreading even more.

It was also the hand she held onto Judas with.

“A lady? Why are you like that?”

As Judas moved closer to see, Eliya hastily hid her hand.

“Uh, it’s nothing.”

She didn’t want to worry someone who had just awakened.

Nothing major would be happening.

Then Judas spoke carefully.

“Is Yuel… alright?”

At that, Eliya looked at Hermis.

Hermis nodded, then explained in place of Eliya.

“Rest assured. The injured parts are completely healed. However….”

“Don’t tell me he has a disability….”

“No. There’s no hindrance to movement. However, the injury on his butt has resulted in no hair growing back there. It’s like a pink hole exposing the skin.”

“That’s….”

Judas thought it was a somewhat cute scar, even if he felt a bit sorry about it.

“Anyway, so he’s fine.”

“Yes, indeed. There hasn’t been any hindrance to movement.”

“Thank goodness….”

“The reason we found you, Judas, was thanks to Yuel.”

The five knights—Hermis, Shylock, Richard, Lindell, and Dike—were drawing attention elsewhere to assist Judas.

During that time, limping Yuel found them.

“After following Yuel, I found Lord Judas who had collapsed and was injured.”

Thanks to Yuel, they were able to quickly move Judas back to the mansion.

“What a good lad…. And I must express my gratitude to the five of you for your help.”

“It was nothing.”

“What will happen to the Imperial Army?”

This time, Eliya answered.

“They retreated after taking the Sun Symbol. After that, I’ve been with you, so I’m not really aware…”

At that moment, Yurideke interjected.

“I have some information regarding the Imperial Army’s movements. Recently, thousands of residents from the Royal Capital Yggdrasil have disappeared all of a sudden.”

“Thousands?”

“Yes. I didn’t get to learn more due to the travel restrictions….”

While she was finishing her statement, someone banged on the door loudly.

When Hermis opened it, Dillon appeared.

He gestured to Judas and said to Eliya.

“There are guests asking for you, Lord Duke.”

“For me?”

“Yes. They claimed to be the Magic Tower Master.”

“…Epona?”

Eliya instructed to bring her in.

Soon Epona appeared.

In a hurry, her green hair was a mess.

“Eliya! There’s been trouble!”

“…?”

“The Emperor right now…!”


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