Not long ago, I thought I was living a pretty unhappy life.
Isn’t that right? Whether it was friends I had known for a long time or friends I had just made, I had to eventually part ways with them. I also had to escape my beloved neighborhood as if I were being chased away, and there was one crazy group after me.
But if I think about it, there were always people helping me.
Kagami was one of them. As my mom, Kagami had done everything she could for me. If there was something Kagami couldn’t do for me, it wasn’t because she didn’t want to, but simply because she couldn’t.
I never took it for granted, but I had always lived seeing Kagami sacrifice for me. And in a way, I had grown somewhat accustomed to that.
Dad was the same. Even though there was no blood relationship, he was always someone who tried to protect me.
…No matter whether they were blood-related or not, the people around me had always willingly helped me.
But the scene before my eyes now was different.
“Father…?”
Sota’s eyes shook in shock.
Sota was always a kind kid. He showed a slightly reserved side in front of me, but he was cheerful around his male friends.
Even among the girls, discussions about Sota often came up. It was only natural for him to be popular since he was the most ordinary-looking boy in the class.
To a little child’s eyes, Sota seemed rather grown-up.
But.
“Sota.”
Sota’s father frowned.
“Sota. Come here. That girl… Shii has a place she needs to return to.”
Shii burrowed deeper into Sota’s arms.
A smaller child snuggling into a slightly bigger one.
Children are beings that rely on adults. Even I once did so. Even if I knew there were cases where that wasn’t possible, seeing it right in front of me was a different matter.
A small child who has no adult to lean on—leans on another child who isn’t even a middle schooler yet. It was as if she was begging for protection.
Feeling an indescribable emotion upon seeing that was unavoidable.
“Hey.”
Dad opened the door.
“I don’t know what the situation is—”
“If you don’t know anything, wouldn’t it be polite not to interfere?”
Sota’s father interrupted Dad’s words.
I stared at him, dumbfounded.
He was an ordinary person. In his late thirties, perhaps? He looked like he got married in his mid to late twenties and had probably been married for about ten years. Considering Sota’s age, that makes sense.
It seemed he had divorced quite some time ago.
His angry expression wasn’t scary compared to Dad’s face. He truly was an average person. Unlike the strange woman I had previously seen who resembled Kagami, he was genuinely normal—but—
“No matter what, about the kids…”
Dad had a fake daughter in me, and there was a real daughter as well, so he seemed to find that attitude completely incomprehensible.
“Sota.”
Sota’s… father, or whatever I should call him, called Sota sternly.
If he were an elementary school student, he wouldn’t dare to oppose his parent’s instructions. Especially in 1999, which hadn’t even reached the 21st century yet; the reality was even stricter.
Sota’s trembling eyes gazed at the Shii in his arms.
Shii was trying not to leave Sota.
“Sota—”
Just then, the man claiming to be Sota’s father spoke again, but Kagami moved towards Sota and Shii.
And gently placed a hand on the shoulders of the two kids.
“Shii-chan.”
Kagami spoke softly.
“…”
Even at Kagami’s words, Shii wouldn’t raise her head, cuddling into her brother.
It was as if she was afraid of someone trying to take her away.
“Shii-chan, would you like to stay with us for a while?”
“Mom?”
I called out to Kagami a little surprised.
Kagami looked at me and smiled softly.
Various complicated thoughts surfaced. In particular, Shii isn’t our child. Regardless of blood ties, living together could itself become a crime.
Sota’s dad was glaring at Kagami. Dad briefly wiped his expression away, surveying the situation. Of course, he was ready to intervene if anyone tried to rush in.
“Sota-kun.”
“Yes?”
“We’ll take care of Shii-chan for a bit. Just a few days. You can come to see her whenever you want during that time.”
“You, is that really—”
Sota’s father’s words were cut off by Dad.
Dad didn’t do something extraordinary.
He just held his palm out toward Sota’s father, meaning to stay there without moving.
His expression was calm, but his temple said otherwise. A prominent vein was bulging, creating an uneasy feeling as if he might hit someone if things went wrong.
I didn’t expect Dad to do that, but to others, it might look a bit different.
‘Are you a Yakuza?’ was a thought that could have crossed anyone’s mind if it were the situation. However, Sota’s father kept glancing around. It wasn’t just fear but also an awareness of the surrounding eyes.
If he was someone who valued appearances, he could have just taken better care of his children from the beginning.
I’m sure there’s a story behind it. But in light of how these two children were treated, I thought he had lost any legitimacy in that story.
“…Mr. Sasaki.”
Kagami, who had previously listened to Sota’s story, turned towards Sota’s father.
Then, with her hands together, she bowed deeply and spoke.
“Is it okay for us to keep Shii-chan at our place for a few days?”
“…”
It seemed that Sota’s father had lost for words upon seeing Kagami go that far.
“Didn’t you plan to send her back to her mother from the start?”
Dad slowly opened his mouth. His expression wasn’t vastly different from usual, but the vein in his temple still bulged. His voice was low and grave.
Despite having moments of high-pitched excitement when talking to me, he was serious right now.
“I don’t think staying at a friend’s house for a few days would be too much of a problem.”
“…”
Hearing that explanation, it seemed Sota’s father thought it wouldn’t be a big loss for him either.
Calling her ‘that woman’ or ‘that woman’s daughter’ shows he didn’t even consider her his daughter. Did he think whatever trouble arose would fall onto us?
Or perhaps he just didn’t want to make a scene anymore. If Shii were with us, then our house would make a ruckus despite everything.
“…If a problem arises, it’s your fault.”
Sota’s father said that.
“Sota.”
And he called Sota.
“…”
Sota hugged Shii tightly once again.
In this situation, bringing Sota to our house would quite likely be a reckless move. Everyone here knew that.
Sota whispered in Shii’s ear.
“Shii, I’ll come to see you tomorrow too.”
“…”
Shii lifted her head. Those two eyes captured Sota entirely.
That expression pulled at my heartstrings.
I too have a younger sibling. We often fought and sometimes even threw real insults at each other, but we were family nonetheless.
We would give each other birthday gifts, go on trips together as a family, and if we heard someone was bullying the other, we would rush out of the house.
If they had to live completely torn apart with no one else to lean on, it would be even more so.
“I’ll come again tomorrow. It’s okay.”
Sota said that.
Shii stayed silent for a long time but eventually nodded as if she had given up.
*
“…Mom.”
“I’m sorry, Koto Ne.”
On the way home.
Shii refused to hold hands with Kagami and Dad. It seemed she wasn’t allowing any closeness to adults. Did she think getting closer would only lead to more wounds?
“But… it was hard to just watch.”
“…”
I know.
Kagami is my mom.
A person with children can empathize more with parents who have lost children in movies or dramas than someone without kids. If that isn’t an illusion created by the media, then even more so.
Most importantly, Kagami was the one who had run away with me.
She gave birth to me at an age when she could still be called a ‘child,’ and even at that age, she ran away with me.
No matter the circumstances, Kagami giving birth to me indicates she had been through horrible abuse.
Perhaps Kagami was not simply a mom but was seeing her own childhood reflected in me.
Someone who wished to be saved.
A little child who desperately wanted to be pulled out from that pain.
Kagami wrapped her arms around my shoulders.
I gripped Kagami’s hem more tightly and stood closely next to her.
I didn’t know what was going to happen next. For now, Shii had decided to stay for a few days.
…It wouldn’t be strange if her mother appeared right in front of our house at any moment.
Tonight felt like it might be a bit long.
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