I won’t give you my feelings.
That’s the mantra I’ve repeated over and over in my mind.
It’s an important attitude for someone who regresses.
This world is a game.
Everyone except me is an NPC or an extra.
When I regress, they all disappear.
Every incident becomes a non-event.
The experiences of laughter and chatter fade away.
They all turn into different people and reappear before my eyes.
That’s why I thought there’s nothing more foolish than giving them my feelings.
The more I develop feelings, the harder it becomes to deceive them.
It becomes harder to face them.
And it makes me dread the regression…
But just because I make up my mind doesn’t mean it goes my way.
As long as they’re people and not machines, feelings will inevitably arise, even if I don’t want them to.
I can’t help but feel attracted to good people.
Even if I’ve built up so much animosity, it eventually turns into love-hate.
Even if I try to forget, I keep thinking about it.
It’s something I can’t help.
But I didn’t cross the last line.
No, I couldn’t.
Because it’s systemically blocked.
If I were to cross the line and develop a relationship with the main heroines beyond a certain point, the completion rate would hit 100%, and the ending would trigger immediately.
That’s why maintaining that line became second nature; I trained myself in it.
Always hitting a psychological resistance to never cross that line, no matter what.
I’ve been misunderstood as a coward countless times.
But today…
“You seem very blunt. But that’s not true, right? You’re just pretending to be blunt. You deliberately don’t share your feelings with people. Why is that?”
“……”
“Is it because they’re people you’ll eventually part ways with?”
“I won’t deny that.”
“Every encounter is followed by a parting. It’s just a matter of whether it’s short or long. They’re all the same. So, Yoo Jin… don’t suppress your feelings too much. If you do, your heart will probably suffer. Recognize that partings make encounters precious, and try to be honest…”
I can feel it.
I feel like I’m being persuaded by Cornelia.
She hasn’t mentioned anything about regression or the system.
Yet, it feels like she sees right through me and is systematically refuting my arguments.
It’s almost as if she’s calling me a coward and a spineless man.
But those words feel right, and I don’t know how to respond.
I am indeed a coward.
A coward afraid of parting, who can’t even try to meet.
But listening to Cornelia’s words makes me realize.
Up until now, I haven’t been cautious.
In trying to prepare for the next round, I haven’t been putting my all into this one.
I haven’t been sincere.
So it’s no wonder I keep failing in every round.
How can I expect to earn the heroines’ feelings while being afraid to give my own?
There’s no way in hell that a coward who procrastinates for the next time would yield the best results.
‘Should I have been honest from the start?’
I shouldn’t have hidden my feelings.
If I had faced things with an honest heart from the beginning, I might have cleared the game by now.
Out of fear of parting, I’ve been prolonging my pain.
‘Encounters are precious because there are partings…’
There’s no encounter without parting.
Every bond inevitably has an end.
And even after parting, the memories of that bond don’t disappear.
Their value still remains in my heart.
I have to acknowledge that.
I’ve been forcing myself to delay partings, taking advantage of the fact that I’m a regressor.
I’ve tried to achieve encounters without parting.
Perhaps the blockage in my regressions is also a result of that pathetic attitude of mine.
I must seem frustrating, thinking I can keep fleeing indefinitely.
So maybe that’s why I feel like I’m being compelled to confront things head-on.
‘This is the final round. From now on, I won’t hide my feelings.’
Cornelia’s small piece of advice led to a big realization.
I won’t suppress my feelings any longer.
And at this moment, I came to a clear understanding.
Of the romantic feelings approaching me from Cornelia.
And I don’t dislike Cornelia.
No, I definitely like her.
I finally recognize the feelings I’ve been denying.
After all, Cornelia isn’t a main heroine, so I can cross that line without triggering an ending.
So there’s no reason to hesitate anymore.
“Ha-um…”
It was a light kiss.
It had been so long that I trembled as if it were my first time.
The pleasure I hadn’t tasted in 12 years shook my mind.
Cornelia seemed the same, unable to collect her thoughts.
Her gaze looking up at me mixed with a hint of fear.
Yet still, the arms wrapped around my neck tightened more and more.
While we held each other tightly, our lips moved awkwardly, like two virgins sharing a kiss.
In reality, neither of us were virgins…
“Ugh…”
An uncontrollable impulse drove my body.
Without thinking, I pushed Cornelia against the door.
With a thump sound, as our lips met again…
“Cornelia?”
A familiar voice came from beyond the door.
My eyes widened.
A shiver ran down my spine, and as I tried to lift my head, Cornelia held onto my neck and wouldn’t let go.
Maybe this is the right answer.
If I broke the kiss, I might have made a sound without realizing it.
“Cornelia, are you in there?”
“……”
Knock, knock, knock.
The door vibrated as someone knocked it.
Nevertheless, we pressed our lips together, sharing breath and calming our heartbeats.
Finally, when we managed to calm down, I loosened the grip of Cornelia’s hands around my neck.
Carefully, I pulled back my lips to avoid making a sound.
I thought our saliva didn’t mix, but a strand of it stretched between our lips and snapped.
“Haah. Yes. I’m in here.”
“Can I open the door?”
“Ah! No! I’m currently changing clothes!”
“Are you changing right in front of the door…?”
“I forgot to lock the door and just came to lock it now.”
“Ah, I see…”
A conversation continued across the door.
In the meantime, Cornelia hurriedly slipped off her skirt and changed into the pants that had been on the sofa, pointing towards the window with her finger.
I nodded and quietly made my way toward the window without making a sound.
‘I’ve gathered all the information I need. I’ve confirmed that Cornelia is safe.’
The white smoke Jill claimed to have seen.
To be honest, I didn’t trust it much during the first round.
That’s because there was no such setting in the story…
However, the reason I followed Jill’s words absolutely during the first round was merely because I pampered her then.
But considering the same story told to Cornelia, the chance of that being a lie is low.
Perhaps Jill is actually witnessing the white smoke.
Another threat lurks in Cologne.
Listening to Cornelia’s story, that’s the conclusion I tentatively reached.
‘This is…’
Just as I was about to leap out of the window…
Inside the exhibition room, I saw the mana stones I had gifted to Cornelia.
It wasn’t the high-grade mana stones I received from Elvenguard.
It was the cheap mid-grade mana stone I had initially gifted to Cornelia.
I had completed my first dungeon conquest with Cornelia’s support, including a letter as a memento.
But now, it was being displayed as if it were an extravagant mana stone.
‘What are you doing?! Hurry up and go!’
Now fully dressed, Cornelia was silently shouting at me with her mouth.
I grinned and leaped out the window.
“I’ve changed completely. So what’s the deal?”
“Umm, I have something to discuss. But was there someone else inside?”
“No? Why do you think that?”
“I just… had that feeling…”
I landed softly by stepping on the wall’s carvings to avoid making noise.
At that moment, I heard a drumroll as Cornelia closed the window and drew the curtains.
I gracefully slipped over the mansion’s wall.
As I did, I spotted Mi Jeong, who had been kicking stones by the roadside, quickly approaching me.
“Let’s go. I’m done with my business.”
“……Yoo Jin, something has changed.”
“What?”
“……I don’t know what it is. But it’s different.”
“Bad change?”
“……No. It’s good.”
It felt like Mi Jeong just faintly smiled.
Am I imagining things?
‘Now that I think about it, the one who started to share feelings was heavily influenced by this girl.’
If I think about why I was so easily persuaded by Cornelia’s words, Mi Jeong had a huge part in it.
I had intended to use her without giving any feelings but ended up giving her feelings instead.
Mi Jeong had also become someone precious to me.
But that doesn’t mean I’m weak.
People wield their greatest power when trying to protect something precious.
If I were to lose Mi Jeong, my heart would probably ache painfully.
But I’ll overcome it.
I’ll be much stronger than the cool jerk I was who treated Mi Jeong like a tool.
That much is for sure.
“From now on, I’ve decided to be honest with my feelings.”
“……Oh. What kind of feelings?”
“I’ve acknowledged it. I seem to love multiple women simultaneously.”
“……Trash.”
Mi Jeong’s sharp retort momentarily shakes my heart.
But this is an unavoidable truth.
What am I supposed to do about my true feelings?
It’s not like I have a choice disorder.
The three main heroines I’ve been conquering for 12 rounds.
And Cornelia; I love them all.
Even knowing that an end will come someday and I’ll part from them all.
I can boldly confess that.
“Alright. Now we’ll investigate the sewers. If there’s something suspicious in Cologne, it’s likely to be in the sewers.”
“……Trash.”
“Belphegor isn’t here, but another of the Four Heavenly Kings might show up. So be careful.”
“……Trash.”
It seems Mi Jeong has picked up a new habit after hanging out with me.
.
.
.
|Ugh. Hah. Huh…|
Drip. Droop droop.
Water droplets fell, filling the sewers with fresh sounds.
From within that darkness, eerie laughter began to echo.
It was a massive rainwater tunnel constructed beneath the cathedral to prevent Cologne from flooding, but it had been shut down due to aging and the risk of collapse.
From the walls of that tunnel, which had no entrances…
|Hehehehe!|
A figure, not a person but a spirit (靈), emerged.
The spirit, having broken through the wall, staggered towards the depths of the tunnel.
Inside, countless people stood in neat rows.
Their faces expressionless, as stiff as mannequins.
The spirit passed by each one, selecting them with keen interest.
Then, it cheerfully stood in front of one woman.
|Heheh, I’ve chosen you today!|
Swoosh.
The spirit entered the woman’s mouth.
Color returned to her pale face, and life sparkled in her eyes.
Soon, the woman wore the same droopy expression as the spirit and began to stagger with the same awkwardness.
|Finally, you’ve come!|
At that moment, a long object drifted into the small channel.
Seeing this, the woman rushed over, retrieved it, and tore the tape that wrapped it.
Out came the corpse of a person.
The woman tenderly caressed the corpse as if it were precious and infused it with demonic energy.
So that the corpse could no longer decay.
To make it look like it was always alive, even while dead.
And to make it her puppet.
|With this, I’ve collected my 665th material! Hehehe! It’s almost time!|
The woman lined up the newly created puppet next to the other corpses and staggered deeper into the ranks.
In the center of them lay the corpse of a gigantic spider.
Its body bore a deep stab wound in its abdomen.
|Kali. Just wait a bit, okay? Hehe. I’ll bring you back to life soon. No one will come here anyway, so there’s no need to worry about interruptions. Uhuh, heehee…|
