I’m too reliant on the Status Window, aren’t I?
…Well, that’s actually obvious.
Before distributing my stats, I had no talent in dance or singing whatsoever.
That I, who was hopeless, managed to win in Na Ah Ah and become an idol was all thanks to the Status Window.
So, it’s only natural that I tend to rely on it… but still…
Does that mean I’m nothing without the Status Window?
Haa…
I want to say no, but it felt like the truth.
With a complicated heart, I opened my Status Window for the first time in a while.
[Ha Ye-rin]
[Age: 19]
[Trait: Sky Demon (천마), Extreme Demon (극마)(Locked)]
[Physical Detailed Stats]
[Intelligence Detailed Stats]
[Artistic Detailed Stats]
“…Sky Demon.”
My trait, Sky Demon, stood out.
Sky Demon. The leader of the dark sect from martial arts novels.
Those from the dark sect in martial arts novels rapidly grow their power through evil methods known as demonic arts.
However, that abnormally gained power has side effects, and those who use demonic arts eventually crumble.
The Sky Demon also became powerful using demonic arts, but in the end, couldn’t overcome the protagonist and faced defeat.
Could the trait of Sky Demon… predict such a fate for me?
Relying on the Status Window as if it were demonic arts, growing quickly but ultimately facing defeat…
Could that be the future that awaits me?
Anxiety chain-reacts, giving birth to more anxiety.
Only when I imagined failing my quest and receiving the penalty of ‘Void’ did I…
“Ugh…! What the heck am I thinking…”
I pulled the blanket over my head and forced my eyes shut.
‘As Seo Yoo-jin said, everything will be fine…’
When I checked again not long ago, my MBTI was INFP.
How ridiculous it was to lose sleep over unimportant things as an INFP!
‘Let’s just sleep…, quickly….’
Looking at my phone, it was already past 2 AM.
Surprised at how time had flown, I tried to sleep early for tomorrow’s schedule, but… forcing myself to sleep only made it harder.
Swish-.
“…Uhm, unnie?”
“Sorry, I woke you up. Go back to sleep, Yoo-jin.”
Squish.
So I went over to Seo Yoo-jin’s bed and hugged her tightly like every night.
Thank goodness, cuddling her soft, plushy, teddy bear-like presence made me fall asleep quickly.
‘Forget it, don’t think negatively about starting activities.’
Thus, I fell asleep, making a resolution not to entertain bad thoughts.
Our worries were gradually becoming reality.
Last time, before 24 hours had even passed, Secret Girl ranked 1st on the Top 100 chart, but this time, we hadn’t even ranked 1st a week later.
Naturally, we weren’t ranked 1st in the first week’s music show either.
No, during the first week, we didn’t even make it to the top 3 candidates.
In reality, this was expected, and last time’s achievement was extraordinary, yet the atmosphere wasn’t great.
“Everyone, let’s cheer up, okay? The fans are supporting us a lot too.”
“Yes, we’ll do our best!”
Even though our results weren’t good, we didn’t just sulk and despair.
The more challenging the situation, the more we united to uplift each other’s spirits.
And then, during the second week of the music show.
“Whoa…! We ranked 1st!”
“Huh? Really?”
“Yes! Breaking Bad! ranked 1st!”
After 16 days since the release of Breaking Bad!, we finally achieved the number one spot in music charts.
This time, we might face difficulties with overlapping schedules with other popular groups, but we managed to achieve it.
“Phew…”
“Wow, thank goodness…”
The members, who had worried we might not rank 1st during this activity, finally let out a sigh of relief.
At that moment, Seo Yoo-jin, who had been observing, threw out the topic.
“So, can we rank 1st on this week’s music show?”
“……!”
Right, just ranking 1st on the music chart wasn’t the end.
To truly claim the top, we had to rank 1st on the music show too.
During our last activity, the Rookies ranked 1st from week 1 onwards across cable and terrestrial channels for several weeks, establishing a reign.
‘We can do it again!’
I secretly clenched my fists, believing that we could achieve that once more.
But….
“It might be tough.”
“…What?”
“We aren’t going to rank 1st on the music show this time.”
Unexpected negativity came from Yoo Seol.
She who had always uplifted our spirits when the members were down shook her head, leaving us no choice but to ask her.
“……Why?”
“Why can’t we rank 1st on the music show when we’ve already ranked 1st on the music chart?”
Yoo Seol answered firmly despite our desperate questions.
“And… we can’t help it. This activity is a single, not an album.”
“…Ah.”
The moment I heard her words, I flinched.
‘Come to think of it, Breaking Bad! is a digital single….’
The ranking on music shows incorporates various metrics.
While music performance is indeed a crucial indicator, album sales also weigh significantly.
Since digital singles have zero album sales, it was akin to carrying a huge penalty compared to other groups preparing albums.
“Of course, there are rare cases where a digital single ranks 1st on music shows… but it can be seen as extremely tough. So let’s not have overly high expectations.”
“…Okay.”
“There are advantages to digital singles too, so don’t be too disheartened.”
The advantage of a digital single is that the preparation period is short, allowing for quicker activities.
The reason we opted for our second activity as a digital single instead of an album was due to our group’s nature.
The Rookies are a temporary one-year group.
From NAS’s perspective, they needed to quickly promote us and make money within that short time frame, so it would be regrettable to waste time preparing another album.
“Yeah, it can’t be helped.”
“Still, we ranked 1st in music streams!”
The members nodded as if they understood the current reality and the company’s situation.
“Rookies, it’s time to go to the stage~”
At that moment, a staff member entered the waiting room announcing that it was time for the 1st place announcement.
“Let’s go, everyone. We still need to see who ranks 1st.”
“Yeeesss.”
Thus, we headed to the stage, though giving up on the dream of ranking 1st in the music show due to Yoo Seol’s words.
And….
[Alright, now let’s find out today’s 1st place candidate for Music Run!]
[Breaking Bad! – Rookies]
“……!”
“Huh, us!”
Perhaps due to the influence of topping the music chart, Rookies were nominated for 1st place, making all of us members, including myself, excited for a moment, but…
Zing!
[Album Sales: 0]
“Ahhh…!”
As expected, since we had zero album sales, Rookies’ rise stopped abruptly.
[Congratulations! Wise’s ‘Look into My Eyes’ is the 1st place for this week!]
In the end, the music show’s 1st place was handed over to the boy group from JJ Entertainment.
‘Well, it’s what I expected…’
Even though I had anticipated this, I felt a pang of disappointment since we had even reached the candidate stage.
On top of that, the frustration I had harbored since the release of the song mixed with it….
I felt as if a rock had been placed on my chest, and this discomfort wouldn’t easily fade away.
I desperately wished for someone to relieve this suffocating feeling.
After the music show, we headed to NAS headquarters.
We were puzzled by the sudden request for additional filming as we arrived at the company, but what awaited us was…
Surprise!
“Congratulations on your 150 days since debut, Rookies!”
“Congratulations on topping the music charts!”
“Waaaaah-!”
It was a surprise party, complete with party hats and a pretty cake thrown by the administrative staff.
“Waaah-! I’m really surprised!”
“Oh my goodness… my heart….”
150 days since debut.
Having received no hint from our manager oppa about this unexpected event, we were shocked.
And our expressions were….
Click.
Captured on camera.
I later learned they were filming for our self-contained content.
“150 days means we’ve passed the halfway point. Congratulations.”
“Now, you’re well-established idols.”
“Huh, Han Si-woo!”
Surprisingly, even the busy Han Si-woo was present for the surprise party.
For the next two hours, we engaged in a Q&A and 150-day celebration event, filling our self-contained content.
After filming ended, we enjoyed a relaxing break.
“Here, take a piece of cake each.”
“Waaaah-!”
Even Director Jeong, who usually tightly controlled snacking, gave each member a piece of cake today.
“It’s delicious….”
After not having sweets for a while, my mood seemed to lighten just a bit.
We discussed our upcoming schedule with Director Jeong while eating cake.
“This week, we’ll only be participating in music shows until now.”
“…What? Why? It’s only the second week!”
“Well, these days, music shows don’t have as much influence as before, and Breaking Bad! is a single, so there’s not much incentive for us to be on them.”
It seemed the company recognized that it was nearly impossible to rank 1st on a music show with a digital single.
Director Jeong declared that instead, we would fill our activity period through entertainment shows and various other filming.
“So just put in some effort this week for music shows. Oh, we’ll have collaborations with other idols for shorts, so we’ll notify you later.”
“Yes!”
As we listened to Director Jeong, munching on our cake, it was then…
“I’ll step out for a bit.”
As Director Jeong was finishing up, Han Si-woo got up and stepped outside.
I briefly watched Han Si-woo’s back and…
“I also need to go to the bathroom.”
I followed behind him.
Having been a mentor often since his Na Ah Ah days, I believed he could help me with my worries again this time.
But….
“…Where did he go?”
No matter how much I looked around outside, I couldn’t spot Han Si-woo.
Thinking he might be in the bathroom, I waited in front of the men’s restroom, but he didn’t come out.
Flustered, I roamed around the floors until I found Han Si-woo…
“Han Si-woo, Producer?”
“Ye-rin?”
It was a small terrace leading outside.
“What are you doing here…? Ah…”
Han Si-woo was smoking there.
And the sight of him smoking was eerily reminiscent of Shin Si-woo from Black Night smoking marijuana.
Given that the YW that Han Si-woo belonged to had been embroiled in a drug incident, I couldn’t help but flinch.
But….
“Ye-rin, just a moment. Don’t come over, it stinks of smoke.”
As Han Si-woo hurriedly extinguished the cigarette and sprayed some air freshener, I managed to see that the cigarette he smoked was a domestically produced one easily available at convenience stores.
Relieved, I patted my chest and asked Han Si-woo.
“I see you smoke too, Producer Han Si-woo.”
“Yeah, when things get tough and I have a lot on my mind, sometimes…”
Han Si-woo replied, briefly looking up at the sky with sad eyes before breaking into a wry smile.
“Even if it seems like entertainers live comfortably, what’s seen is not all there is… You know it now, right Ye-rin?”
“……”
I nodded slowly.
Seeing my reaction, Han Si-woo smiled softly and gestured.
“I don’t think you followed me out for no reason… You look like you have something on your mind. Go ahead and speak; as a 15-year veteran idol, I’ll answer whatever you ask.”
Noticing my troubled expression, he took the initiative to offer me advice.
I stepped closer to him…
“Actually…”
And began to voice the suffocating feelings I had bottled up inside, one by one.
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