I realized on a winter day at the age of 27 that life rarely goes as planned.
I chose the elementary school close to the apartment I lived in since childhood, and on the way back, our family car crashed into a taxi driven by a drunk driver.
My father and I were unharmed, but my mother was left with complications in one leg for life.
In middle school, my first friend revealed the pocket change I had to the school’s bully during our walk in the alley, and our friendship fell apart right there.
Looking back, it was trivial, but I was such a naïve soul that I locked myself in the library, graduating middle school without a single friend.
In high school, I had decent scores on the mock exams and dreamt of entering a prestigious university, finally seeing my father and mother’s smiles after a long time.
The next day, I learned that my father had a serious illness inside him.
After a trip to the hospital, it was my father who encouraged our family who sat in silence for a while.
“It’s okay. Everything will be fine.”
My mother and I believed his words and stood back up. Just like that, happiness seemed to return to our family.
“The surgery was successful, and the CT results are clean. We’ll keep an eye on things moving forward.”
“Thank you, Doctor!”
My father successfully underwent surgery.
“Hey, Hyeonwoo, do you remember that senior from our club? He started a company and needed someone for admin work, so I recommended you.”
“Really? Thank you!”
I somehow juggled a cram school and part-time jobs, graduated from a decent university, and scheduled an interview at an office through a senior who graduated earlier.
Then, the next month, my father passed away.
The disease had been discovered too late, so after multiple long surgeries, the treatment barely succeeded, but it turned out my father’s heart was not healthy enough to endure the lengthy operations and harsh medications.
“…….”
My mother’s weeping silhouette at the funeral home was pitifully heartbreaking.
The rough texture of the black suit pants I borrowed from the funeral home.
The smell of oil flowing from the kitchen’s spicy beef soup pot.
The sound of a message from my senior confirming my decision to give up on the interview.
Tears wouldn’t come anymore, leaving my vision dry and blurry.
All the sensations felt unreal, like a dream.
Overwhelming despair made everything feel disconnected.
“Father…”
And a few months after my father’s funeral.
Creeeak—!
A flash encountered on the alleyway.
Pain coursing through my entire body.
Gradual paralysis enveloping me.
Lying cold on the pavement, barely exhaling.
The driver’s breath confirming my presence.
The faint scent of alcohol wafting from that breath.
As I heard the fading sound of the car, my consciousness slowly faded to black.
All I could think about was my mother.
“Mom…”
My first life came to an end on that cold winter day.
Then, on a hot summer day filled with rain.
I woke up in a shabby room, transformed into a silver-haired girl from the light novels I cherished as a child.
Ah, life really… never goes as planned.
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